Tim. That's a lascivious apprehension.

Apem. So thou apprehend'st it. Take it for thy labor. Tim. How dost thou like this jewel, Apemantus? Apem. Not so well as plain-dealing,' which will not cost a man a doit.

Tim. What dost thou think 'tis worth?

Apem. Not worth my thinking.-How now, poet? Poet. How now, philosopher?

Apem. Thou liest.

Poet. Art not one?

Apem. Yes.

Poet. Then I lie not.

Apem. Art not a poet?
Poet. Yes.

Apem. Then thou liest: look in thy last work, where thou hast feigned him a worthy fellow.

Poet. That's not feigned; he is so.

Apem. Yes, he is worthy of thee, and to pay thee for thy labor. He that loves to be flattered, is worthy o'the flatterer. Heavens, that I were a lord!

Tim. What wouldst do then, Apemantus?

Apem. Even as Apemantus does now, hate a lord with my heart.

Tim. What, thyself?

Apem. Ay.

Tim. Wherefore?

Apem. That I had no angry wit to be a lord.2Art not thou a merchant?

Mer. Ay, Apemantus.

Apem. Traffic confound thee, if the gods will not!

1 Alluding to the proverb: Plain-dealing is a jewel, but they who use it die beggars.

2 This line is corrupt, undoubtedly, and none of the emendations or substitutions that have been proposed are satisfactory. Perhaps we should read, "That I had (now angry) wished to be a lord;" or, "That I had (so angry) will to be a lord." Malone proposed to point the passage thus, "That I had no angry wit. To be a lord!" and explains it, "That I had no wit [or discretion] in my anger, but was absurd enough to wish myself one of that set of men whom I despise." These are the best helps which have been afforded towards a solution of this enigmatical passage, and it must be confessed they are feeble.

Mer. If traffic do it, the gods do it.

Apem. Traffic's thy god, and thy god confound

thee.

Trumpets sound. Enter a Servant.

Tim. What trumpet's that?

Serv.

'Tis Alcibiades, and Some twenty horse, all of companionship.1 Tim. Pray, entertain them; give them guide to [Exeunt some Attendants. You must needs dine with me:-Go not you hence, Till I have thanked you;—and, when dinner's done, Show me this piece.-I am joyful of your sights.

us.

Enter ALCIBIADES, with his Company.

Most welcome, sir!

[They salute.

Apem.

So, so; there!—

Aches contract and starve your supple joints!—
That there should be small love 'mongst these sweet

knaves,

And all this court'sy! The strain of man's bred out Into baboon and monkey.2

Alcib. Sir, you have saved my longing, and I feed Most hungrily on your sight.

Tim.

3

Right welcome, sir:

[Exeunt all but Apemantus.

Ere we depart, we'll share a bounteous time
In different pleasures. Pray you, let us in.

Enter two Lords.

1 Lord. What time a day is't, Apemantus? Apem. Time to be honest.

1 i. e. Alcibiades' companions.

2 Man is degenerated; his strain or lineage is worn down into a monkey.

3 It has been before observed that to depart and to part were anciently

synonymous.

1 Lord. That time serves still.

Apem. The most accursed thou,' that still omit'st it. 2 Lord. Thou art going to lord Timon's feast? Apem. Ay; to see meat fill knaves, and wine heat fools.

2 Lord. Fare thee well, fare thee well.

Apem. Thou art a fool, to bid me farewell twice. 2 Lord. Why, Apemantus?

Apem. Should'st have kept one to thyself, for I mean to give thee none.

1 Lord. Hang thyself.

Apem. No, I will do nothing at thy bidding; make thy requests to thy friend.

2 Lord. Away, unpeaceable dog, or I'll spurn thee hence.

Apem. I will fly, like a dog, the heels of the ass.

[Exit. 1 Lord. He's opposite to humanity. Come, shall we in,

And taste lord Timon's bounty? he outgoes
The very heart of kindness.

2 Lord. He pours it out. Plutus, the god of gold, Is but his steward: no meed, but he repays

Sevenfold above itself; no gift to him,

But breeds the giver a return exceeding

All use of quittance.3

1 Lord.

The noblest mind he carries,

That ever governed man.

2 Lord. Long may he live in fortunes! Shall we in? 1 Lord. I'll keep you company.

1 Ritson says we should read:

"The more accursed thou."

2 Meed here means desert.

[Exeunt.

3 i. e. all the customary returns made in discharge of obligations.

SCENE II. The same. A Room of State in Timon's House. Hautboys playing loud music. A great banquet served in; FLAVIUS and others attending.

Then enter TIMON, ALCIBIADES, Lucius, Lucullus, SEMPRONIUS, and other Athenian Senators, with VENTIDIUS, and Attendants.-Then comes, dropping after all, APEMANTUS, discontentedly.

Ven. Most honored Timon, 't hath pleased the gods to remember

My father's age, and call him to long peace.
He is gone happy, and has left me rich:
Then, as in grateful virtue I am bound
To your free heart, I do return those talents,
Doubled, with thanks and service, from whose help
I derived liberty.

Tim.

O, by no means,

Honest Ventidius: you mistake my love:
I gave it freely ever; and there's none
Can truly say, he gives, if he receives:

If our betters play at that game, we must not dare
To imitate them. Faults that are rich, are fair.1
Ven. A noble spirit.

[They all stand, ceremoniously, looking on

TIMON.

Tim. Nay, my lords, ceremony

Was but devised at first to set a gloss

On faint deeds, hollow welcomes,

Recanting goodness, sorry ere 'tis shown;

But where there is true friendship, there needs none. Pray, sit; more welcome are ye to my fortunes,

Than my fortunes to me.

[They sit. 1 Lord. My lord, we always have confessed it. Apem. Ho, ho, confessed it? hanged it, have you not?

1 "The faults of rich persons wear a plausible appearance."

2 There seems to be some allusion to a common proverbial saying of Shakspeare's time, "Confess and be hanged."

Tim. O Apemantus! you are welcome.
Apem.

You shall not make me welcome.

I come to have thee thrust me out of doors.

No,

Tim. Fie! thou art a churl: you have got a humor

there

Does not become a man; 'tis much to blame :

They say, my lords, Ira furor brevis est;
But yond' man's ever angry.1

Go, let him have a table by himself;
For he does neither áffect company,
Nor is he fit for it, indeed.

Apem. Let me stay at thine apperil,2 Timon;
I come to observe; I give thee warning on't.

Tim. I take no heed of thee; thou art an Athenian; therefore welcome; I myself would have no power: pr'ythee, let my meat make thee silent.

Apem. I scorn thy meat; 'twould choke me, for 3

I should

Ne'er flatter thee.-O you gods! what a number
Of men eat Timon, and he sees them not!

It grieves me, to see so many dip their meat
In one man's blood; and all the madness is,

He cheers them up too.

I wonder men dare trust themselves with men.

Methinks they should invite them without knives;1
Good for their meat, and safer for their lives.
There's much example for't; the fellow that

Sits next him now, parts bread with him, and pledges
The breath of him in a divided draught,

Is the readiest man to kill him: it has been proved. If I

Were a huge man, I should fear to drink at meals,

1 The old copy reads, " Yond' man's very angry.

2 Steevens and Malone dismissed apperil from the text, and inserted own peril; but Mr. Gifford has shown that the word occurs several times in Ben Jonson :

"Sir, I will bail you at mine own apperil."

3 For in the sense of cause or because.

Devil is an Ass.

4 It was the custom, in old times, for every guest to bring his own knife.