Phang. If I but fift him once; 7 if he come but within my vice. Hoft. I am undone by his going; I warrant you, he is an infinitive thing upon my score. Good Mr. Phang, hold him fure; good Mr. Snare, let him not 'scape. He comes continually to Pie corner, faving your manhoods, to buy a faddle: and he is indited to dinner to the Lubbars-head in Lombard-street, to Mr. Smooth's the Silkman. I pray ye, fince my exion is enter'd, and my cafe fo openly known to the world, let him be brought in to his answer. 9 A hundred mark is a long Lone, for a poor lone woman to bear ; and I have borne, and borne, and borne, and have been fub'd off, and fub'd off, from this day to that day, that it is a fhame to be thought on. There is no honefty in fuch dealing, unless a woman fhould be made an Afs and a beaft, to bear every knave's wrong. Enter Falstaff, Bardolph, and the boy. Yonder he comes, and that arrant' malmsey-nose knave Bardolph with him. Do your offices, do your offices, Mr. Phang and Mr. Snare, do me, do me, do me your offices. Fal. How now? whose mare's dead? what's the matter? 7 If he come but within my vice.] Vice or grafp. A metaphor taken from a fmith's vice: There is another reading in the old Edition, view, which I think not fo good. POPE. 8 Lubbar's-head] This is, I fuppofe, a colloquial corruption of the Libbard's head. 9 A hundred mark is a long one,] A long one? A long What? It is almost needlefs to obferve, how familiar it is with our Poet to play the Chimes A hundred Marks is a long Lone Phang. Changes to the Boar's-head Tavern in Eaft-cheap. Enter two Drawers. 1 Draw. W Apple- Johns? thou know'ft, Sir John HAT the devil haft thou brought there? cannot endure an apple-John. 2 Draw. Mafs! thou fayeft true. The Prince once fet a dish of Apple-Johns before him, and told him there were five more Sir Johns, and, putting off his hat, faid, I will now take my leave of these fix dry, round, old, wither'd knights. It anger'd him to the heart; but he hath forgot That. 8 1 Draw. Why then, cover, and set them down; and fee if thou can't find out Sneak's Noife; Mrs. Tearfbeet would fain hear some musick. Difpatch!-The room where they fupt is too hot, they'll come in ftraight. 2 Draw. Sirrah, here will be the Prince, and Master Poins anon; and they will put on two of our jerkins and aprons, and Sir John must not know of it. Bardolph hath brought word. 1 Draw. Then 'here will be old Utis: it will be an excellent ftratagem. 2 Draw. I'll fee, if I can find out Sneak. [Exeunt. Hoft. I'faith, fweet heart, methinks, now you are in an excellent good temperality, your pulfidge beats as extraordinarily as heart would defire, and your colour, I warrant you, is as red as any rofe; but, i'faith, you have drank too much canaries, and that's a marvellous fearching wine; and it perfumes the blood, ere we can fay what's this. How do you now? Dol. Better than I was. Hem. Hoft. Why, that was well faid. A good heart's worth gold. Look, here comes Sir John. Enter Falstaff. Fal. When Arthur first in Court-empty the jourden -and was a worthy King: how now, Mrs. Dol. Hoft. Sick of a calm; yea, good footh. 2 Fal. So is all her fect; if they be once in a calm, they are fick. Dol. You muddy rafcal, is that all the comfort you give me? Fal. You make fat rafcals, Mrs. Dol. Dol. I make them! gluttony and diseases make them, I make them not. Fal. If the cook make the gluttony, you help to make the Diseafes, Dol; we catch of you, Dol, we catch of you; grant That, my poor Vertue, grant That. Dol. Ay, marry, our chains and our jewels. 2 ;So is all her feet;—] I know not why feet is printed in all the copies, I believe fex is meant. 3 You make fat rafcals,] Fal staff alludes to a phrafe of the foreft; lean deer are called raf cal deer. He tells her the calls him wrong, being fat he cannot be a rascal. Fal. Fal. Your brooches, pearls and owches. For to ferve bravely, is to come halting off, you know; to come off the breach with his pike bent bravely, and to furgery bravely; to venture upon the charg'd chambers bravely Dol. Hang your felf, you muddy Conger, hang your felf! Hoft. By my troth, this is the old fashion; you two never meet, but you fall to fome difcord; you are both, in good troth, as rheumatick as two dry toafts, you cannot one bear with another's confirmities. What the good-jer? one muft bear, and that must be you; you are the weaker veffel, as they fay, the emptier veffel. [To Dol. Dol. Can a weak empty veffel bear fuch a huge full hogfhead? there's a whole merchant's venture of Bourdeaux ftuff in him; you have not feen a hulk better stuft in the Hold. Come, I'll be friends with thee, Jack.Thou art going to the wars, and whether I shall ever fee thee again or no, there is no body cares. 6 Draw. Sir, ancient Pistel is below and would speak with you? Dol. Hang him, fwaggering rafcal, let him not come hither; it is the foul-mouth'dft rogue in England. Hoft. If he fwagger, let him not come here. No, by my faith, I muft live amongst my neighbours, I'll no fwaggerers. I am in good name and fame with the very beft. Shut the door, there comes no fwaggerers here, I have not liv'd all this while to have swaggering now. Shut the door, I pray you. Fal. Doft thou hear, Hoftefs?— Hoft. Pray you pacify your felf, Sir John; there comes no fwaggerers here. Fal. Do'st thou hear-it is mine Ancient. Hoft. Tilly-fally, Sir John, never tell me; your Ancient fwaggerer comes not in my doors. I was before mafter Tifick the deputy the other day; and, as he faid to me it was no longer ago than Wednesday laft— neighbour Quickly, fays he;-mafter Domb our minifter was by then-neighbour Quickly, fays he, receive those that are civil; for, faith he, you are in an ill name; (now he said fo, I can tell whereupon) for, fays he, you are an honest woman, and well thought on; therefore take heed, what guefts you receive. Receive, fays he, no fwaggering companions. There come none here. You would bless you to hear what he faid. No, I'll no fwaggerers. Fal. He's no fwaggerer, Hoftefs; a tame cheater, i'faith; you may ftroak him as gently as a puppey-greyhound; he will not fwagger with a Barbary hen, if her feathers turn back in any fhew of refiftance. Call him up, drawer. Hoft. Cheater, call you him? 7 I will bar no honest man my houfe, nor no cheater; but I do not love 7 I will bar no boneft man my houfe, nor no cheater;] The hu mour of this confifts in the woman's mistaking the title of Cheater (which our ancestors gave to him whom we now, with better manners, call a Gamefter) for that officer of the exchequer called an Efcheator, well known to the common people of that time; and named, either corruptly or fatirically, a Cheater. WARBURTON. fwagger |