Page images
PDF
EPUB

As some fair violet, loveliest of the glade,
Sheds its mild fragrance on the lonely shade,
Withdraws its modest head from public sight,
Nor courts the sun, nor seeks the glare of
light;
[trude,
Should some rude hand profanely dare in-
And bear its beauties from its native wood,
Expos'd abroad its languid colours fly,
Its form decays, and all its odours die;
So woman, born to dignify retreat,
Unknown to flourish, and unseen be great,
To give domestic life its sweetest charm,
With softness polish, and with virtue warm,
Fearful of Fame, unwilling to be known,
Should seek but Heav'n's applauses and her

own;

Hers be the task to seek the lonely cell Where modest Want and silent Anguish dwell;

Of human wit beware the fatal pride;
An useful follower, but a dang'rous guide:
On holy Faith's aspiring pinions rise;
Assert your birth-right, and assume the
skies.

Fountain of Being! teach us to devote To Thee each purpose, action, word and thought!

Thy grace our hope, thy love our only boast,
Be all distinctions in the Christian lost!
Be this in ev'ry state our wish alone,
Almighty, Wise and Good, Thy will be
done!

ODE TO CHARITY.

[knees, TO BE PERFORMED BY THE CHARACTERS OF

Raise the weak head, sustain the feeble Cheer the cold heart, and chase the dire disease.

The splendid deeds, which only seek a name, Are paid their just reward in present fame; But know, the awful all-disclosing day, The long arrear of secret worth shall pay; Applauding saints shall hear with fond regard. [reward.

THE PIECE.

I.

O CHARITY, divinely wise,

Thou meek-ey'd daughter of the skies! From the pure fountain of eternal light, Where fair, immutable and ever bright, The beatific vision shines,

Where angel with archangel joins
In choral songs to sing His praise,
Parent of Life, Ancient of Days,

And He, who witness'd here, shall there
Euph. With added grace she pleads Re-Who was ere Time existed, and shall be
Through the wide round of vast Eternity;
Oh come, thy warm celestial beams impart,
Enlarge my feelings, and expand my heart!

ligion's cause, [draws. Who from her life her virtuous lesson Ura. In vain, ye fair! from place to place

you roam,

For that true peace which must be found at home:

No change of fortune, nor of scene can give The bliss you seek, which in the soul must live. [breast Then look no more abroad; in your own Seek the true seat of happiness and rest. Nor small, my friends! the vigilance I ask, Watch well yourselves, this is the Christian's task.

[blocks in formation]
[blocks in formation]

STORIES

FOR PERSONS OF THE MIDDLE RANKS.

ADVERTISEMENT.

THESE Stories, which were first published, among a great number of others, in the Cheap Repository, under the signature Z, are here presented to the reader, much enlarged and improved. Such of them as are comprised in this volume being adapted to persons in a superior station to those which are contained in the fourth volume, [Earle's edition, and now published in this, it was thought better to separate and class them accordingly. A brief account of the institution here referred to, will be given in a subsequent place.

THE HISTORY OF MR. FANTOM,

THE NEW FASHIONED PHILOSOPHER,
AND HIS MAN WILLIAM.

MR. FANTOM was a retail trader in the little book written by the NEW PHILOSOcity of London. As he had no turn to any PHER, whose pestilent doctrines have gone expensive vices, he was reckoned a sober about seeking whom they may destroy; decent man, but he was covetous and proud, these doctrines found a ready entrance into selfish and conceited. As soon as he got Mr. Fantom's mind; a mind at once shallow forward in the world, his vanity began to dis- and inquisitive, speculative and vain, ambiplay itself, though not in the ordinary me- tious and dissatisfied. As almost every thod, that of making a figure and living book was new to him, he fell into the comaway; but still he was tormented with a mon error of those who begin to read late in longing desire to draw public notice, and to life-that of thinking that what he did not distinguish himself. He felt a general sense know himself, was equally new to others; of discontent at what he was, with a general and he was apt to fancy that he and the ambition to be something which he was not; author he was reading were the only two but this desire had not yet turned itself to people in the world who knew any thing, any particular object. It was not by his mo- This book led to the grand discovery; he ney he could hope to be distinguished, for had now found what his heart panted half his acquaintance had more, and a man after a way to distinguish himself. To must be rich indeed to be noted for his riches start out a full grown philosopher at once, to in London. Mr. Fantom's mind was a prey be wise without education, to dispute withto his vain imaginations. He despised all out learning, and to make proselytes withthose little acts of kindness and charity out argument, was a short cut to fame, which which every man is called to perform every well suited his vanity and his ignorance. He day; and while he was contriving grand rejoiced that he had been so clever as to ex-, schemes, which lay quite out of his reach, amine for himself, pitied his friends who he neglected the ordinary duties of life, took things upon trust, and was resolved to which lay directly before him. Selfishness assert the freedom of his own mind. To a was his governing principle. He fancied man fond of bold novelties and daring parahe was lost in the mass of general society: doxes, solid argument would be flat, and and the usual means of attaching importance truth would be dull, merely because it is not to insignificance occurred to him; that of new. Mr. Fantom believed, not in proporgetting into clubs and societies. To be con- tion to the strength of the evidence, but to the nected with a party would at least make impudence of the assertion. The trampling him known to that party, be it ever so low on holy ground with dirty shoes, the smearand contemptible; and this local importance ing the sanctuary with filth and mire, the it is which draws off vain minds from those calling prophets and apostles by the most Scenes of general usefulness, in which, though they are of more value, they are of less distinction.

About this time he got hold of a famous

scurrilous names was new, and dashing, and
dazzling. Mr. Fantom, now being set free
from the chains of slavery and superstition,
was resolved to show his zeal in the usual

[ocr errors]

way, by trying to free others; but it would duced peaceable subjects and good citizens; have hurt his vanity had he known that he while in Fantom, a boundless selfishness and was the convert of a man who had written inordinate vanity converted a discontented only for the vulgar, who had invented no- trader into a turbulent politician. thing, no, not even one idea of original wic- There was, however, one member of the kedness; but who had stooped to rake up Cat and Bagpipes whose society he could out of the kennel of infidelity, all the loath- not resolve to give up, though they seldom some dregs and offal dirt, which politer un-agreed, as indeed no two men in the same believers had thrown away as too gross and class and habits of life could less resemble offensive for their better bred readers. each other. Mr. Trueman was an honest,

Mr. Fantom, who considered that a philo-plain, simple-hearted tradesman of the good sopher must set up with a little sort of stock old cut, who feared God and followed his buin trade, now picked up all the common-siness; he went to church twice on Sundays, place notions against Christianity,, which and minded his shop all the week, spent fruhave been answered a hundred times over; gally, gave liberally, and saved moderately. these he kept by him ready cut and dried, He lost, however, some ground in Mr. Fanand brought out in all companies with a zeal tom's esteem, because he paid his taxes, which would have done honour to a better without disputing, and read his Bible withcause, but which the friends to a better cause ont doubting. are not so apt to discover. He soon got all Mr. Fantom now began to be tired of evethe cant of the new school. He prated about ry thing in trade except the profits of it; for narrowness, and ignorance, and bigotry, the more the word benevolence was in his and prejudice, and priestcraft on the one mouth, the more did selfishness gain domihand; and on the other, of public good, the nion in his heart. He, however, resolved to love of mankind, and liberality, and can- retire for a while into the country, and dedour, and toleration, and above all, benevo-vote his time to his new plans, schemes, thelence. Benevolence, he said, made up theories, and projects for the public good. A whole of religion, and all the other parts of life of talking, and reading, and writing, and it were nothing but cant, and jargon, and hy-disputing, and teaching, and proselyting, pocrisy. By benevolence he understood a now struck him as the only life; so he soon gloomy and indefinite anxiety about the hap-set out for the country with his family; for piness of people with whom he was utterly unhappily Mr. Fantom had been the husdisconnected, and whom Providence had put it out of his reach either to serve or injure. And by the happiness this benevolence was so anxious to promote, he meant an exemption from the power of the laws, and an emancipation from the restraints of religion, conscience, and moral obligation.

band of a very worthy woman many years before the new philosophy had discovered that marriage was a shameful infringement on human liberty, and an abridgment of the rights of man. To this family was now added his new footman, William Wilson, whom he had taken with a good character out of a Finding, however, that he made little im- sober family. Mr. Fantom was no sooner pression on his old club at the Cat and Bag-settied than he wrote to invite Mr. Truepipes, he grew tired of their company. This man to come and pay him a visit, for he club consisted of a few sober citizens, who would have burst if he could not have got met of an evening for a little harmless re- some one to whom he might display his new creation after business; their object was, not knowledge; he knew that if on the one hand to reform parliament, but their own shops; Trueman was no scholar, yet on the other not to correct the abuses of government, but he was no fool; and though he despised his of parish officers; not to cure the excesses prejudices, yet he thought he might be made of administration, but of their own porters a good decoy duck; for if he could once and apprentices; to talk over the news of bring Trueman over, the whole club at the the day without aspiring to direct the events Cat and Bagpipes might be brought to folof it. They read the papers with that anxie- low his example; and thus he might see ty which every honest man feels in the daily himself at the head of a society of his own history of his country. But as trade, which proselytes; the supreme object of a philosothey did understand, flourished, they were pher's ambition. Trueman came accordcareful not to reprobate those public mea-ingly. He soon found that however he might sures by which it was protected, and which be shocked at the impious doctrines his they did not understand. In such turbulent times it was a comfort to each to feel he was a tradesman, and not a statesman; that he was not called to responsibility for a trust for which he found he had no talents, while he was at full liberty to employ the talents he really possessed, in fairly amassing a fortune, of which the laws would be the best guardian, and government the best security. Thus a legitimate self-love, regulated by prudence, and restrained by principle, pro

friend maintained, yet that an important lesson might be learned even from the worst enemies of truth; namely, an ever wakeful attention to their grand object. If they set out with talking of trade or politics, of private news or public affairs, still Mr. Fantom was ever on the watch to hitch in his darling doctrines; whatever he began with, he was sure to end with a pert squib at the Bible, a vapid jest on the clergy, the miseries of superstition, and the blessings of philoso

phy. Oh!' said Trueman to himself, when man. What can be more delightful than to shall I see Christians half so much in ear- see a paper of one's own in print against tynest? Why is it that almost all zeal is on ranny and superstition, contrived with so the wrong side?'

much ingenuity, that, though the law is on 'Well, Mr. Fantom,' said Trueman one the look-out for treason and blasphemy, a day at breakfast, 'I am afraid you are lead- little change of name defeats its scrutiny. ing but an idle sort of life here.-Idle, sir!' For instance; you may stigmatize England said Fantom; 'I now first begin to live to under the name of Rome, and Christianity some purpose; I have indeed lost too much under that of Popery. The true way is to time, and wasted my talents on a little retail attack whatever you have a mind to injure, trade, in which one is of no note; one can't under another name, aud the best means to distinguish one's self.' 'So much the bet- destroy the use of a thing, is to produce a ter,' said Trueman; I had rather not dis- few incontrovertible facts against the abuses tinguish myself, unless it was by leading a of it. Our late travellers have inconceivabetter life than my neighbours. There is bly helped on the cause of the new philosonothing I should dread more than being phy, in their ludicrous narratives of creduljtalk'd about. I dare say now heaven is in a ty, miracles, indulgences, and processions, in good measure filled with people whose popish countries, all which they ridicule unnames were never heard out of their own der the broad and general name of Religion, street and village. So I beg leave not to dis- Christianity, and the Church.' And are not tinguish myself! Yes, but one may, if it you ashamed to defend such knavery?' is only by signing one's name to an essay or said Mr. Trueman. Those who have a paragraph in a newspaper,' said Fantom.- great object to accomplish,' replied Mr. Heaven keep John Trueman's name out of Fantom, must not be nice about the means, a newspaper,' interrupted he in a fright; But to return to yourself Trueman; in your for if it be there, it must either be found in little confined situation you can be of no the Old Bailey or the bankrupt list, unless, use.' That I deny,' interrupted Trueman; indeed, I were to remove shop, or sell off my I have filled all the parish offices with some old stock. Well, but Mr. Fantom, you, I credit. I never took a bribe at an election, suppose, are now as happy as the day is no not so much as a treat; I take care of my long? O yes,' replied Fantom, with a apprentices, and do not set them a bad exgloomy sigh, which gave the lie to his words, ample by running to plays and Sadler's perfectly happy! I wonder you do not give Wells, in the week, or jaunting about in a up all your sordid employments, and turn gig all day on Sundays; for I look upon it philosopher! Sordid indeed !' said True- that the country jaunt of the master on Sunman, do not call names, Mr. Fantom; I days exposes his servants to more danger shall never be ashamed of my trade. What than their whole week's temptation in trade is it has made this country so great? a coun- put together.' try whose merchants are princes? It is trade, Mr. Fantom, trade. I cannot say indeed, as well as I love business, but now and then, when I am overworked, I wish I had a little more time to look after my soul; but the fear that I should not devote the time, if I had it, to the best purpose, makes me work on; though often, when I am balancing my accounts, I tremble, lest I should neglect Trueman. I suppose you mean the works to balance the grand account. But still, of God: for I never read in the Bible that since, like you, I am a man of no education, Nature made any thing. I should rather I am more afraid of the temptations of lei- think that she herself was made by Him, sure, than of those of business. I never was who, when he said, thou shalt not murder,' bred to read more than a chapter in the Bi- said also, thou shalt keep holy the Sabbath ble, or some other good book, or the maga-day.' But now do you really think that all zine and newspaper; and all that I can do that multitude of coaches, chariots, chaises, now, after shop is shut, and take a walk with vis-a-vis, booby-hutches, sulkies, sociables, my children in the field besides. But if I had phaetons, gigs, curricles, cabrioles, chairs, nothing to do from morning to night, I might stages, pleasure carts, and horses, which be in danger of turning politician or philoso- crowd our roads; all those country houses pher. No, neighbour Fantom, depend upon within reach, to which the London friends it, that where there is no learning, next to pour in to the gorgeous Sunday feast, which God's grace, the best preservative of human the servants are kept from church to dress; virtue is business. As to our political socie-all those public houses under the signs of ties, like the armies in the cave of Adullam, which you read these alluring words, an or'every man that is in distress, and every dinary on Sundays; I say, do you really beman that is in debt, and every man that is lieve that all those houses and carriages are discontented, will always join themselves crammed with philosophers, who go on Sununto them.' day into the country to admire the works of Fantom. You have narrow views, True-nature, as you call it! Indeed, from the reel

Fantom. I once had the same vulgar prejudices about the church and the Sabbath, and ali that antiquated stuff. But even on your own narrow principles, how can a thinking being spend his Sunday better (if he must lose one day in seven by having any Sunday at all) than by going into the country to admire the works of nature.

ing gait of some of them when they go back at night, one might take them for a certain sect called the tippling philosophers. Then in answer to your charge, that a little tradesman can do no good, it is not true; I must tell you that I belong to the Sick Man's Friend, and to the Society for relieving prisoners for small debts.

Fantom. I have no attention to spare to that business, though I would pledge myself to produce a plan by which the national debt might be paid off in six months; but all yours are petty occupations.

Trueman. Then they are better suited to petty men of petty fortune. I had rather have an ounce of real good done with my own hands, and seen with my own eyes, than speculate about doing a ton in a wild way, which I know can never be brought about. Fantom. I despise a narrow field. O for the reign of universal benevolence! I want to make all mankind good and happy.

Trueman. Dear me! sure that must be a wholesale sort of a job; had you not better try your hand at a town or a parish first!

jects are in general the offspring of restlessness, vanity and idleness. I am too busy for projects, too contented for theories, and, I hope, have too much honesty and humility for a philosopher. The utmost extent of my ambition at present is, to redress the wrongs of a parish apprentice who has been cruelly used by his master: Indeed I have another little scheme, which is to prosecute a fellow in our street who has suffered a poor wretch in a workhouse, of which he had the care, to perish through neglect, and you must assist me.

Fantom. The parish must do that. You must not apply to me for the redress of such petty grievances. I own that the wrongs of the Poles and South Americans so fill my mind, as to leave me no time to attend to the petty sorrows of workhouses and parish apprentices. It is provinces, empires, continents, that the benevolence of the philosopher embraces; every one can do a little paltry good to his next neighbour.

Trueman. Every one can, but I do not see that every one does. If they would, inFantom. Sir, I have a plan in my head for deed, your business would be ready done at relieving the miseries of the whole world. your hands, and your grand ocean of benevoEvery thing is bad as it now stands. I would lence would be filled with the drops which alter all the laws; and do away all the reli- private charity would throw into it. I am gions, and put an end to all the wars in the glad, however, you are such a friend to the world. I would every where redress the in-prisoners, because I am just now getting a justice of fortune, or what the vulgar call little subscription from our club, to set free Providence. I would put an end to all pu- our poor old friend Tom Saunders, a very nishments; I would not leave a single prison- honest brother tradesman, who got first into er on the face of the globe. This is what I debt, and then into jail, through no fault of call doing things on a grand scale. A scale his own, but merely through the pressure of with a vengeance,' said Trueman. As to the times. We have each of us allowed a releasing the prisoners, however, I do not so trifle every week towards maintaining Tom's much like that, as it would be liberating a young family since he has been in prison; few rogues at the expense of all honest men; but we think we shall do much more service but as to the rest of your plans, if all Chris- to Saunders, and indeed in the end lighten tian countries would be so good as to turn our own expense, by paying down at once a Christians, it might be helped on a good deal. little sum to restore to him the comforts of There would be ssill misery enough left in- life, and put him in a way of maintaining deed; because God intended this world his family again. We have made up the should be earth and not heaven. But, sir, money all except five guineas: I am already among all your oblations, you must abolish promised four, and you have nothing to do human corruption before you can make the but give me the fifth. And so for a single world quite as perfect as you pretend. You guinea, without any of the trouble, the meephilosophers seem to me to be ignorant of tings, and the looking into his affairs, which the very first seed and principle of misery- we have had; which, let me tell you, is the sin, sir, sin: your system of reform is radi- best, and to a man of business, the dearest cally defective; for it does not comprehend part of charity, you will at once have the that sinful nature from which all misery pre-pleasure (and it is no small one) of helping ceeds. You accuse government of defects to save a worthy family from starving, of rewhich belong to man, to individual man, and deeming an old friend from gaol, and of putof course to man collectively.- Among all ting a little of your boasted benevolence into your reforms you must reform the human action. Realize! master Fantom: there is heart; you are only hacking at the branch- nothing like realizing. Why, hark ye, Mr. es, without striking at the root. Banishing Trueman,' said Fantom, stammering, and impiety out of the world, would be like stri-looking very black, do not think I value a king off all the pounds from an overcharged guinea; no sir, I despise money; it is trash; bill; and all the troubles which would be left, would be reduced to mere shillings, pence, and farthings, as one may say.' Fantom. Your project would rivet the chains which mine is design'd to break.

Trueman. Sir, I have no projects. Pro

[ocr errors]

it is dirt, and beneath the regard of a wise man. It is one of the unfeeling inventions of artificial society. Sir, I could talk to you for half a day on the abuse of riches, and on my own contempt of money.'

Trueman. O pray do not give yourself

« PreviousContinue »