A Description of the KINGDOM of LOVE.

An ALLEGORY.

Defcription of the and one Treyfac de Vergy is candidate to fucceed him, but it is thought he will lofe his election by a late publication called the Palinode, which is not quite to footy as his former productions. The falaries of the Profeffors, which are very genteel, are paid by the Board of Ordnance of the Kingdom of Love, whofe chief officers are ftiled Noble, Bell, Cabe, and Lowndes.

Travellers generally quit this town as foon as they have loaded themselves with its pretty bagatelles, and repair by a bye road to a little hamlet called Declaration of Love; here all the inhabitants fpeak fo very low, that when they earnestly defire to be understood, they are forced to fqueeze the hand of the perfon to whom they addrefs their difcourfe. One would imagine they were very virtuous, for their faces are always crimfoned over with the blufh of honeft bafhfulness, when they enter into converfation with one another. From this hamlet you enter a long, narrow lane, full of turnings and windings, in which there are a number of little altars by the way fide containing the images of a certain goddess called Proteftation, to whom all travellers pay their vows, if they mean to arrive fafe at their journey's end. There is a fmall ftep before each altar which will only hold two perfons to kneel at a time, and by command of the Empress no two of the fame fex are to pay their devotions together. Extraordinary devotion feems to agitate travellers when they facrifice at thefe fhrines, for they are obferved to ftrike their hands very often upon their breafts, and having afterwards joined them clofe together, hold them up with their eyes fixed towards Heaven, using the most horrible oaths to confirm what they fay-yet fuch is their misfortune that none but fools believe them.

From the altars of Proteftation you go on to an eminence ftiled by the geographers Mount Confidence, where you have a fine prospect of a little town called Attempt, the inhabitants of which are faid to be good fencers, but they have not the leaft judgment of the fword. There was formerly in this place a strong cattle known by the name of the Tower of Reffance, which was

VOL. VII.

Kingdom of Love..

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fcarce ever taken but by ftorm; it has long fince fallen to decay, and from its ruins the prefent inhabitants have built a little defenceless fort, which is called by way of derifion-Quickly furrender. From Attempt you will, with much toil and labour, gain the city of Poffeffion, the capital of the kingdom, exceedingly delightful at firft fight, and furrounded with mazes and labyrinths, in which many paffengers of the diffe rent fexes lofe themfelves for a time, and feem to forget that they can proceed any further; but when they.recover from this pleafing delirium, they generally fet out again on their travels, rather penfive and melancholy; after many weary fteps they find themfelves at a mean, pitiful market town, fome few leagues from the city of Poffeffion, called Satiety; provifions are very cheap here, but the air of the place is fo unwholefome, that it takes away the appetites of the inhabitants, and will not permit them to taste the most delicate viands, which on the contrary they confideras, the moft common, and of little or no value.

Annexed to fatiety is the province of Matrimony, which inclofes one third of the Kingdom of Love, but though the most populous is not fo pleasant as the reft of the country, the air partaking from its proximity, of the bad qualities complained of in fatiety, fo that it is a common practice with its inhabitants to crofs a river called Lethe," and fojourn for fome time in the county on the oppofite fhore, named Fresh Defire, from whence they have but a fmall day's journey to the groves of Afignation, where they foon recover their loft fpirits and appetite, by the cheering rays of alluring glances; and while they remain in this delightful retreat, they lofe all remembrance of what engaged their attention in the province of Matrimony, expreffing no defire to return to it; but there are certain laws and regulations, which the political ftate of the kingdom have made neceffary, obliging thefe wanderers to return home at itased feafons, yet all do not obey them, and thofe who are recufants fuffer the pains of outlawry, itiled in this countrydivorce from bed and board-a punish

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Anecdote of the celebrated La Fontaine.
You are therefore
regions of Love.
advised to weigh every advantage and
difadvantage maturely before you un-
dertake this difficult journey.
He that will the prize obtain
Muft undergo much toil and pain.

ment formerly deemed infamous, but now born with patience by the firft nobility, and daily introducing as a fashion rather than a punishment. Thus you fee there is but one grand circuit to be made throughout the

ANECDOTE of the Celebrated LA FONTAINE.

LA FONTAINE is as much and
justly admired for that beautiful
fimplicity which is remarkable through-
out all his works, as for the agreeable
Jeffons he gives us in his immortal
fables, which are univerfally admired
as the true ftandards of excellence in
that way of writing. He had many
particularities in his difpofition, which
rendered the world rather divided in
their opinion of him as a man; fome
admiring him as a philofopher happy
in his own imaginations, while others
thought him a ftrange excentric mortal
too auftere to comply with the man-
ners of the times, and too proud to
follow any example which he had not
himself established; he was even looked
upon by many as a rank fool; would
fit in company many hours hardly
fpeaking a word, concentred as it
were within himself. We muft excufe
him, as a French lady well known to
the literary world obferved, by faying,
that he given fo much of his wit to the
animals he introduced in his fables,
that he had kept little or none for him-
felf; be that as it may, the following
anecdote is quoted as a proof of that
fault we find him fo reproached with:

In one of his tales he has this opinion

on cuckoldom :

'Tis a mere trifle when reveal'd;
'Tis nothing while it's kept conceal'd.

Our author had to his wife another
Xantippe, and untameable fhrew in
temper, quite the reverse of her easy
husband, her amorous fires could not
be quenched in the cold arms of a
philofopher; the therefore refolved to
give him fuch a rival as might recom-
pence her in the day-time for her ill
fpent nights. An intimate acquain-
tance of La Fontaine's foon offered
the wished for antidote to her preying

melancholy, and gloried in the dif

honour of his worthy acquaintance.
La Fontaine, poor man, was the laft
who became fenfible of their guilty in-
tercourfe, and either too honeft to
think a man capable of fuch a breach
through the laws of hofpitality, or too
bufy with the heavenly fifters to think
on the affairs of this fublunary world,
never had come to the knowledge of
his wife's difloyalty, had not fome of
his particular friends been witness to
her incontinency, and put it beyond
the power of her ingenuous hufband to
doubt of, or continue blind to his dif-
grace. "You are a cuckold," faid
they, "Well and what then?" "Why
nothing but blood can atone for the
affront." After many arguments urged
by them to roufe his mind to revenge,
"Well," faid La Fontaine, "if it
must be fo it muft." Early one morn-
ing he took down an old toledo which
had been in the family many centuries
paft, the blade, maiden like, had pro-
bably never fhewn itself naked: thus
armed he haftens to the disturber of his
peace, who fatigued perhaps with his
laft rencounter with Madam La Fon-
taine, was locked fast in the arms of
Morpheus; roufed by the voice of his
friend, and amazed at his untimely
vifit, "In the name of wonder," fays
he, "what brings you here thus early,"
"O nothing, only I am told I must try
to cut your throat, and call you up for
that purpofe." The other expoftulated
in vain, and together they adjourned
to the fpot, where La Fontaine, after
much ado, for a deep ruft had locked
it faft in the fcabbard, drew his terrible
weapon, when his antagonist retiring
a few paces,
"For God's fake, Sir,'
fays he, before we begin this ferious
matter, let me know in what I have
"They tell me,"
injured you."
anfwered

The Fortunate Shipwreck.

answered our Dove-like author," that you have made a cuckold of me;" "Is that all," fays his friend, "but, dear Sir, you know that

'Tis a meer trifle when revealed; 'Tis nothing while it's kept coneealed." "Right, right," exclaimed La Fontaine, fheathing his toledo, "I had almost forgot it;" and then arm in arm they went to a neighbouring tavern, where this dread-promifing quarrel was amicably adjusted entirely to the fatisfaction of all parties; and though the familiarities between the lovers was continued for several years

"E

afterwards, La Fontaine was as happy in the company of his friend as if he really believed cuckoldom to be a neceffary qualification to gain admittance into the regions of blifs in the world to come. For my part, I beg leave to differ from those who ftile this behaviour the height of infenfibility. Is it a dishonour to a man, if his wife turns a ftrumpet; and muft he add to the appellation of a cuckold that of a murderer, or fall a facrifice to his endeavoursfor what? punishing in another the luft of a lewd and abandoned woman!

The FORTUNATE SHIPWRECK.
A NOVE L.

VIL itfelf hath its good." The truth of this trite adage is in moft circumftances very obfervable. Providence hath fo difpofed of every event, that one may find juft ground to believe in a general optimifm, and abfolutely deny the existence of what is termed phyfical evil. What we generally call misforture is only fo by comparison, and agreeable to the ideas we have of things. As there is no folid good but virtue, there can exist no real evil but vice. From our most dejected circumftances often spring the tide of happiness, and the rock that hath dafhed the difabled feaman's laft refource proves oft in the end a falutary haven. Most of my readers have felt, or in the fequel may prove but few can fo forcibly as myself experience the juftnefs of the foregoing obfervations.

I was born in one of the pleasantest and wealthiest cities of Italy. I loft my mother at an age when the want of fuch a bleffing cannot be felt. Signor Seraphini, my father, though not then above thirty, never thought of marrying a fecond time. Whether he was actuated by that tender regard a good heart preferves for the memory of a beloved wife, or influenced by a particular taste for a fingle life, or whether he forefaw too much danger in trying the hazardous experiment of

altering his condition, I cannot determine, though I know that although in a manner courted by several families to whom his alliance might have proved both advantageous and honourable, he declined all profers, and refolved to center on me alone all his affections. I was brought up with a distinction becoming the heir of a genteel and wealthy family, and that tender care a doating parent commonly beftows on an only child. Mafters of all kinds were fummoned about me as soon as I was thought capable of profiting by their affiftance. But my father himfelf fuperintended my education, justly looking on that material point as the moft ferious, and worthy a parent's ultimate care. It is owing more to his vigilence than my tutors known abilities, that I haftened with a quick step over the thorny paths of youthful learning to thofe more serious studies that complete the man.

I was now twenty, when my father refolved to fend me to Paris; our parting was on his fide manly, though affectionate; as for me I felt and fhewed an unfeigned concern, I was hurrying from the fincereft friend and worthieft parent, whom fate perhaps had decreed I should fee no more. I fet off with a proper equipage, and neceffary recommendations. I made the principalities of Italy in my way. I always tho ght B 2

it

To the EDITOR of the OXFORD MAGAZINE. With a Copper-Plate annexed, of a certain Earl learning the French Language.)