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Longitude by Bomb Vessels, and of increafing the Trade Wind by vaft plantations of Reeds and Sedges.

1 shall mention only a few of his Philosophical and Mathematical Works.

1. A complete Digeft of the Laws of Nature, with a Review of those that are obfolete or repealed, and of those that are ready to be renewed and put in force,

2. A Mechanical Explication of the Formation of the Universe, according to the Epicurean Hypothefis,

3. An investigation of the Quantity of real Matter in the Universe, with the proportion of the specifick gravity of folid matter to that of fluid.

4. Microscopical Obfervations of the Figure and Bulk of the conftituent Parts of all Fluids. A Calculation of the proportion in which the fluids of the carth decrease, and of the period in which they will be totally exhaufted.

5. A Computation of the Duration of the Sun, and how long it will laft before it be burned out.

6. A Method to apply the Force arifing from the immense Velocity of Light to mechanical purposes.

7. An answer to the question of a curious Gentleman ; How long a New Star was lighted up before its appear ance to the inhabitants of our earth? To which is fubjoined a calculation, how much the inhabitants of the Moon eat for Supper, confidering that they país a Night equal to fifteen of our natural days.

8. A Demonftration of the natural Dominion of the Inhabitants of the Earth over thofe of the Moon, if ever an intercourse should be opened between them. With a Propofal of a Partition Treaty, among the earthly Potentates, in case of such discovery.

9. Tide-Tables, for a Comet, that is to approximate towards the Earth.

10. The Number of the Inhabitants of London deter mined by the Reports of the Gold-finders, and the Top nage of their Carriages; with allowance for the extraor

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dinary quantity of the Ingesta and Egefta of the people of England, and a deduction of what is left under dead walls, and dry ditches.

It will from hence be evident, how much all his Studies were directed to the univerfal Benefit of Mankind. Numerous have been his Projects to this end, of which Two alone will be sufficient to show the amazing Grandeur of his Genius. The firft was a Propofal, by a general contribution of all Princes, to pierce the first cruft or Nucleus of this our Earth, quite through, to the next concentrical Sphere. The advantage he propofed from it was, to find the Parallax of the Fixt Stars; but chiefly to refute Sir Ifaac Newton's Theory of Gravity, and Mr. Halley's of the Variations. The fecond was, to build Two Poles to the Meridian, with immenfe Light-houses on the top of them; to fupply the defect of Nature, and to make the Longitude as easy to be calculated as the Latitude. Both thefe he could not but think very practicable, by the Power of all the Potentates of the World.

May we prefume after these to mention, how he defcended from the fublime to the beneficial parts of Knowledge, and particularly his extraordinary practice of Phyfick. From the Age, Complexion, or Weight of the Perfon given, he contrived to prefcribe at a distance, as well as at a Patient's bed fide. He taught the way to many modern Phyficians, to cure their Patients by Intuition, and to others to cure without looking on them at all. He projected a Menftruum to dissolve the Stone, made of Dr. Woodward's Univerfal Deluge water. His alfo was the device to relieve Confumptive or Afthmatick perfons by bringing fresh Air out of the Country to Town, by pipes of the nature of the Recipients of Air-pumps: And to introduce the native air of a man's country into any other in which he should travel, with a seasonable intromiffion of fuch Steams as were moft familiar to him; to the inexpreffible comfort of many Scotfinen, Laplanders, and white Bears,

In Phyfiognomy, his penetration is fuch, that from the picture only of any perfon, he can write his Life, and from the features of the Parents, draw the Portrait of any Child that is to be born.

Nor hath he been fo enrapt in these Studies, as to neglect the polite Arts of Painting, Architecture, Mufick, Poetry, etc. It was he that gave the firft hint to our modern Painters, to improve the Likeness of their Portraits by the ufe of fuch Colours as would faithfully and conftantly accompany the Life, not only in its present ftate, but in all its alterations, decays, age, and death itfelf.

In Architecture, he builds not with so much regard to present symmetry, or conveniency, as with a Thought, well worthy a true lover of Antiquity, to wit, the noble effect the building will have to pofterity, when it shall fall and become a Ruin.

As to Mufick, I think Heidegger has not the face to deny that he has been much beholden to his Scores.

In Poetry he hath appeared under a hundred different names, of which we may one day give a Catalogue.

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In Politicks, his Writings are of a peculiar caft, for the moft part Ironical, and the Drift of them often fo delicate and refined, as to be mistaken by the vulgar. once went so far as to write a Persuasive to people to eat their own Children, which was fo little understood as to be taken in ill part*. He has often written against Liberty in the name of Freeman and Algernon Sidney, in vindication of the Measures of Spain under that of Raleigh, and in praise of Corruption under those of Cato and Publicola.

It is true, that at his laft departure from England, in the Reign of Queen Anne, apprehending left any of these might be perverted to the Scandal of the weak, or Encouragement of the flagitious, he caft them all, without mercy, into a Bog-house near St. James's. Some how

*Swift's ironical tract on that fubject.

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ever have been with great diligence recovered, and fished up with a hook and line, by the Ministerial writers, which make at present the great Ornaments of their works.

Whatever he judged beneficial to mankind, he conftantly communicated (not only during his ftay among us, but ever fince his abfence) by fome method or other in which oftentation had no part. With what incredible Modesty he concealed himself, is known to numbers of those to whom he addreffed fometimes Epiftles, fometimes Hints, fometimes whole Treatifes, Advices to Friends, Projects to firft Minifters, Letters to Members of parliament, Accounts to the Royal Society, and innumerable others.

All these will be vindicated to the true Author, in the course of these Memoirs. I may venture to fay they cannot be unacceptable to any, but to thofe, who will appear too much concerned as Plagiaries, to be admitted as Judges. Wherefore we warn the public, to take particular notice of all fuch as manifeft any indecent Paffion at the appearance of this Work, as Perfons moft certain ly involved in the Guilt,

END of the FIRST BOOK,

MARTINUS SCRIBLERUS,

ΠΕΡΙ ΒΑΘΟΥΣ;

O R

OF THE ART OF

SINKING IN POETRY

Written in the 1727.

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