proper charges it may be made as universal as the world shall please; nay that the longitude and latitude may be generally hereby determined to a greater degree of exactness than the latitude itself is now usually found at sea. So that on all accounts we hope it will appear very worthy the public consideration. We are ready to disclose it to the world, if we may be assured that no other persons shall be allowed to deprive us of those rewards which the public shall think fit to bestow for such a discovery; but do not desire actually to receive any benefit of that nature till sir Isaac Newton himself, with such other proper persons as shall be chosen to assist him, have given their opinion in favour of this discovery. If Mr. Ironside pleases so far to oblige the public as to communicate this proposal to the world, he will also lay a great obligation on his very humble servants,

I Do not care for burning my fingers in a quarrel, but since I have communicated to the world a plan

* ADDISON'S.

P This paper, No. 107. is distinguished by a hand, the signature of Addison's papers in the Guardian; and reprinted, by Mr. T. Tickell, in his edition of Addison's Works,' 4to. vol. iv. p. 165. edit. 1721.

N. B. Addison and Steele befriended Whiston essentially, promoted a subscription for his astronomical lectures at Button's coffee-house, and were among the honourable few who raised a comfortable subsistence to this ungrateful man and his family when distressed. See Tat. cr. 8vo. 6 vols. No. 251. vol. vi. note.

which has given offence to some gentlemen whom it would not be very safe to disoblige, I must insert the following remonstrance; and at the same time promise those of my correspondents who have drawn this upon themselves, to exhibit to the public any such answer as they shall think proper to make to it.

6 MR. GUARDIAN,

I was very much troubled to see the two letters which you lately published concerning the short club. You cannot imagine what airs all the little pragmatical fellows about us have given themselves since the reading of those papers. Every one cocks and struts upon it, and pretends to overlook us who are two foot higher than themselves. I met with one the other day who was at least three inches above five foot, which you know is the statutable measure of that club. This overgrown runt has struck off his heels, lowered his foretop, and contracted his figure, that he might be looked upon as a member of this newerected society'; nay so far did his vanity carry him that he talked familiarly of Tom Tiptoe, and pretends to be an intimate acquaintance of Tim Tuck. For my part, I scorn to speak any thing to the diminution of these little creatures, and should not have minded them had they been still shuffled among the crowd. Shrubs and underwoods look well enough while they grow within the shades of oaks and cedars; but when these pigmies pretend to draw themselves out from the rest of the world, and form themselves into a body, it is time for us who are men of figure to look about us. If the ladies should once take a liking to such a diminutive race of lovers, we should, in a little time, see mankind epitomized, and the whole species in miniature; daisy roots' would grow fashion

q See Nos. 91. and 92.

Daisy roots, boiled in milk, are said to check the growth of puppies. At Bologna, to keep them little, they rub their backs with spirits of wine. A.

able diet. In order therefore to keep our posterity from dwindling, and fetch down the pride of these aspiring race of upstarts, we have here instituted a Tall Club.

As the Short Club consists of those who are under five foot, ours is to be composed of such as are above six. These we look upon as the two extremes and antagonists of the species: considering all those as neuters, who fill up the middle space. When a man rises beyond six foot, he is an hypermeter, and may be admitted into the tall club.

We have already chosen thirty members, the most sightly of all her majesty's subjects. We elected a president, as many of the ancients did their kings, by reason of his height, having only confirmed him in that station above us which nature had given him. He is a Scotch Highlander, and within an inch of a show. As for my own part, I am but a sesquipedal, having only six foot and a half of stature. Being the shortest member of the club, I am appointed secretary. If you saw us all together you would take us for the sons of Anak. Our meetings are held like the old gothic parliaments, sub dio, in open air; but we shall make an interest, if we can, that we may hold our assemblies in Westminster-hall when it is not term-time. I must add to the honour of our club, that it is one of our society who is now finding out the longitude. The device of our public seal is, a crane grasping a pigmy in his right foot.

I know the short club value themselves very much upon Mr. Distich, who may possibly play some of his pentameters upon us, but if he does he shall certainly be answered in Alexandrines. For we have a poet among us of a genius as exalted as his stature, and who is very well read in Longinus his treatise concernProbably Mr. Whiston. See No. 107.

ing the sublime'. Besides, I would have Mr. Distich consider, that if Horace was a short man, Musæus, who makes such a noble figure in Virgil's sixth Æneid, was taller by the head and shoulders than all the people of Elysium. I shall therefore confront his lepidissimum homuncionem (a short quotation, and fit for a member of their club) with one that is much longer, and therefore more suitable to a member of ours.

"Quos circumfusos sic est affata Sibylla;

Museum ante omnes: medium nam plurima turba
Hunc habet, atque humeris extantem suspicit altis.”

VIRG. En. vi. 666.

To these the Sibyl thus her speech address'd:
And first to him" surrounded by the rest:

Tow'ring his height, and ample was his breast. DRYDEN.

If after all, this society of little men proceed as they have begun to magnify themselves, and lessen men of higher stature, we have resolved to make a detachment, some evening or other, that shall bring away their whole club in a pair of panniers, and imprison them in a cupboard which we have set apart for that use, till they have made a public recantation. As for the little bully, Tim Tuck, if he pretends to be choleric, we shall treat him like his friend little Dicky', and hang him upon a peg until he comes to himself. I have told you our design, and let their little Machiavel prevent it if he can.

This is, Sir, the long and the short of the matter. I am sensible I shall stir up a nest of wasps by it, but let them do their worst. I think that we serve our t Leonard Welsted, whose translation of Longinus first appeared in 1712.

u Museus.

v Dick Distich. See No. 92. paragrap. 2. The meaning is, he shall be dressed in black to make him appear yet less, and hung up upon a peg. The late Dr. S. Johnson qualified to have been a member of this tall club, set Osborn astride on a tree at a great height; and at another time. he knocked down this bookseller with one of his own folios.

country by discouraging this little breed, and hindering it from coming into fashion. If the fair sex look upon us with an eye of favour, we shall make some attempts to lengthen out the human figure, and restore it to its antient procerity. In the mean time we hope old age has not inclined you in favour of our antagonists; for I do assure you, Sir, we are all your high admirers, though none more than,

SIR, yours,' &c."

No. 109. THURSDAY, JULY 16, 1713.*

Pugnabat tunica sed tamen illa tegi.

OVID. Amor. 1 Eleg. v. 14.

Yet still she strove her naked charms to hide.

I HAVE received many letters from persons of all conditions in reference to my late discourse concerning the tucker. Some of them are filled with reproaches and invectives. A lady who subscribes herself Teraminta bids me in a very pert manner mind my own affairs, and not pretend to meddle with their linen; for that they do not dress for an old fellow, who cannot see them without a pair of spectacles. Another who calls herself Bubnelia, vents her passion in scurrilous terms; an old ninny-hammer, a dotard, a nincompoop, is the best language she can afford me. Florella indeed expostulates with me upon this subject, and only complains that she is forced to return a pair of stays which were made in the extremity of the

* ADDISON'S.

w This paper, No. 108. is not marked with a hand, the signature of Addison's papers in the Guardian; but it is reprinted, by Mr. T. Tickell, in his edition of Addison's Works,' 4to. vol. iv. p. 168. edit. 1721. It is therefore ascribed here to Addison; but the reader is left to judge for himself on the⚫ competency of this authority.

x No. 100.

y No. 145. ad finem.