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0, then his lines would ravish savage ears,
Pell-mell, down with them! but be first advis'd,
Long. Now to plain-dealing; lay these glozes by:
King. And win them too: therefore let us devise
King. Away, away! no time shall be omitted,
SCENE I.-A Street.
Cost. O, they have lived long in the alms-basket Enter Holofernes, Sir Nathaniel, and Dull. for a word ; for thou art not so long by the head as
of words! I marvel, thy master hath not eaten thee Hol. Satis quod sufficit.
honorificabilitudinitatibus: thou art easier swalNath. I praise God for you, sir, your reasons lowed than a flap-dragon.' at dinner have been sharp and sententious; plea Moth. Peace; the peal begins. sant without scurrility, witty without affection,"
Arm. Monsieur, [To Hol.) are you not letter'd ? audacious without impudency, learned without Moth. Yes, yes; he teaches boys the horn-book : opinion, and strange without heresy. I did con
-What is a, b, spelt backward with a horn on his verse this quondam day with a companion of the head ? king's, who is intituled, nominated, or called, Don
Hol. Ba, pueritia, with a horn added. Adriano de Armado.
Moth. Ba, most silly sheep, with a horn :-You Hol. Novi hominem tanquam te: His humor is hear his learning. lofty, his discourse peremptory, his tongue filed, his
Hol. Quis, quis, thou consonant? eye ambitious, his gait majestical, and his general Moth. The third of the five vowels, if you repeat behavior vain, ridiculous, and thrasonical. He is them; or the fifth, if I. too picked,“ too spruce, too affected, too odd, as it
Hol. I will repeat them, a, e, i.were, too peregrinate, as I may call it.
Moth. The sheep: the other two concludes it; Nath. A most singular and choice epithet. [Takes out his table-book.
Arm. Now, by the salt wave of the MediterraHol. He draweth out the thread of his verbosity neum, a sweet touch, a quick venew of wit: snip, finer than the staple of his argument. I abhor such snap, quick and home; it rejoiceth my intellect: fanatical phantasms, such insociable and point-de- true wit. vise ? companions; such rackers of orthography, as
Moth. Offer'd by a child to an old man; which to speak, dout, fine, when he should say, doubt; is wit-old. det, when he should pronounce, debt; d, e, b, t; Hol. What is the figure? what is the figure? not, d, e, t: he clepeth a calf, cauf; half, hauf; Moth. Horns. neighbor, vocatur, nebour, neigh, abbreviated, ne:
Hol. Thou disputest like an infant: go, whip This is abhominable, (which he would call abomini thy gig. able,) it insinuateth me of insanie ; Ne intelligis, Moth. Lend me your horn to make one, and I domine? to make frantic, lunatic.
will whip about your infamy circùm circa; A gig Nath. Laus deo, bone intelligo.
of a cuckold's horn! Hol. Bone?-bone, for bcnė: Priscian a little
Cost. An I had but one penny in the world, thou scratch'd; 'twill serve.
shouldst have it to buy gingerbread: hold, there is Enter Armado, Moty, and Costard. the very remuneration I had of thy master, thou halfNath. Videsne quis venit?
penny purse of wit, thou pigeon-egg of discretion. Hol. Video, et gaudeo.
0, an the heavens were so pleased, that thou wert Arm. Chirra!
[To Moth. but my bastard! what a joyful father would'st thou Hol. Quare Chirra, not sirrah?
make me! Go to; thou hast it ad dunghill, at the Arm. Men of peace, well encounter’d.
fingers' ends, as they say. Hol. Most military sir, salutation.
Hol. O, I smell false Latin; dunghill for unMoth. They have been at a great feast of lan- guem. guages, and stolen the scraps. [To Costard aside. Arm. Arts-man, præambula; we will be singled # Affectation.
: A small inflammable substance, swallowed in a glass Over-dressed.
» Finical exactness. of wine.
from the barbarous. Do you not educate youth at Hol. Allons! we will employ thee. the charge-house on the top of the mountain ? Dull. I'll make one in a dance, or so; or I will Hol. Or, mons, the hill.
play on the tabor to the worthies, and let them Arm. At your sweet pleasure, for the mountain. dance the hay. Hol. I do, sans question.
Hol. Most dull, honest Dull, to our sport, away. Arm. Sir, it is the king's most sweet pleasure
[Exeunt. and affection, to congratulate the princess at her
SCENE II.-Before the Princess's Parilion. pavilion, in the posteriors of this day; which the rude multitude call the afternoon.
Enter the Princess, KATHARINE, Rosaline, and
MARIA. Hol. The posterior of the day, most generous sir, is liable, congruent, and measurable for the Prin. Sweet hearts, we shall be rich ere we depart, afternoon: the word is well cull'd, chose; sweet | If fairings come thus plentifully in: and apt, I do assure you, sir, I do assure.
A lady wall'd about with diamonds !Arm. Sir, the king is a noble gentleman; and my Look you, what I have from the loving king. familiar, I do assure you, very good friend :-For Ros. Madam, came nothing else along with that! what is inward between us, let it pass :- I do be Prin. Nothing but this ? yes, as much love in seech thee, remember thy courtesy ;-I beseech
rhyme, thee, apparel thy head ; -- and among other im- As would be cramm’d up in a sheet of paper, portunate and most serious designs.--and of great Writ on both sides the leaf, margent and all; import indeed, too;- but let that pass : - for That he was fain to seal on Cupid's name. must tell thee, it will please his grace (by the world) Ros. That was the way to make his god-head sometime to lean upon my poor shoulder; and with
wax; his royal finger, thus, dally with my excrement,' For he hath been five thousand years a boy. with my mustachio: but sweet heart, let that pass. Kath. Ay, and a shrewd unhappy gallows too. By the world, I recount no fable; some certain Ros. You'll ne'er be friends with him; he kill'd special honors it pleaseth his greatness to impart
your sister. to Armado, a soldier, a man of travel, that hath Kath. He made her melancholy, sad, and heavy; seen the world: but let that pass.- The very all of And so she died: had she been light, like you, all is—but sweet heart, I do implore secrecy,– Of such a merry, nimble, stirring spirit, that the king would have me present the princess, She might have been a grandam ere she died: sweet chuck, with some delightful ostentation, or And so may you: for a light heart lives long. show, or pageant, or antic, or fire-work. Now, un Ros. What's your dark meaning, mouse," of this derstanding that the curate and your sweet self,
light word? are good at such eruptions, and sudden breaking Kath. A light condition in a beauty dark. out of mirth, as it were, I have acquainted you Ros. We need more light to find your meaning out. withal, to the end to crave your assistance.
Kath. You'll mar the light, by taking it in snuff;' Hol. Sir, you shall present before her the nine Therefore, I'll darkly end the argument. worthies.—Sir Nathaniel, as concerning some en Ros. Look what you do, you do it still i' the tertainment of time, some show in the posterior of
dark. this day, to be rendered by our assistance,—the Kath. So do not you; for you are a light wench. king's command, and this most gallant, illustrate, Ros. Indeed, I weigh not you; and therefore light. and learned gentleman,-before the princess; I say, Kath. You weigh me not-0, that's you care none so fit as to present the nine worthies.
not for me. Nath. Where will you find men worthy enough Ros. Great reason; for, Past cure is still past care. to present them?
Prin. Well bandied both; a set of wit well play'd. Hol. Joshua, yourself; myself, or this gallant But, Rosaline, you have a favor too: gentleman, Judas Maccabæus; this swain, because Who sent it? and what is it? of his great limb or joint, shall pass Pompey the Ros.
I would, you knew: page, Hercules.
An if my face were but as fair as yours, Arm. Pardon, sir, error: he is not quantity enough My favor were as great; be witness this. for that worthy's thumb: he is not so big as the Nay, I have verses too, I thank Birún: end of his club.
The numbers true; and, were the numb'ring too, Hol. Shall I have audience? he shall present I were the fairest goddess on the ground: Hercules in minority: his enter and exit shall be I am compared to twenty thousand fairs. strangling a snake; and I will have an apology for 0, he hath drawn my picture in his letter!
Prin. Any thing like? Moth. An excellent device! so, if any of the Ros. Much, in the letters: nothing, in the praise. audience hiss, you may cry, Well done, Hercules! Prin. Beauteous as ink; a good conclusion. now thou crushest the snake! that is the way to Kath. Fair as a text B in a copy-book. make an offence gracious; though few have the Ros. 'Ware pencils ! How ? let me not die your grace to do it.
debtor, Arm. For the rest of the worthies?
My red dominical, my golden letter : Hol. I will play three myself.
0, that your face were not so full of O's! Moth. Thrice-worthy gentleman!
Kath. A pox of that jest! and beshrew all shrows! Arm. Shall I tell you a thing?
Prin. But what was sent to you from fair Dumain! Hol. We attend.
Kath. Madam, this glove. Arm. We will have, if this fadge® not, an antic. Prin.
Did he not send you twain ? I beseech you, follow.
Kath. Yes, madam; and moreover,
A huge translation of hypocrisy,
• Formerly a term of endearment. Courage.
1 In anger.
Mar. This, and these pearls, to me sent Lon- | That in this spleen ridiculous appears, gaville;
To check their folly, passion's solemn tears. The letter is too long by half a mile.
Prin. But what, but what, come they to visit us? Prin. I think no less: Dost thou not wish in heart, Boyet. They do, they do; and are apparel'd i The chain were longer, and the letter short?
thus,Mar. Ay, or I would these hands might never Like Muscovites, or Russians: as I guess, part.
Their purpose is, to parle, to court, and dance : Prin. We are wise girls to mock our lovers so. And every one his love-feat will advance
Ros. They are worse fools to purchase mocking so. Unto his several mistress; which they'll know That same Birón I'll torture ere I go.
By favors several, which they did bestow. 0, that I knew he were but in by the week! Prin. And will they so ? the gallants shall be How I would make him fawn, and beg, and seek;
task'd :And wait the season, and observe the times; For, ladies, we will every one be mask'd; And spend his prodigal wits in bootless rhymes; And not a man of them shall have the grace, And shape his service wholly to my behests; Despite of suit, to see a lady's face.And make him proud to make me proud that jests! | Hold, Rosaline, this favor thou shalt wear; 80 portent-like would I o'ersway his state, And then the king will court thee for his dear; That he should be my fool, and I his fate. Hold, take thou this, my sweet, and give me thine; Prin. None are so surely caught, when they are So shall Birón take me for Rosaline.catch'd,
And change your favors too; so shall your loves As wit turn'd fool: folly, in wisdom hatch'd, Woo contrary, deceiv'd by these removes. Hath wisdom's warrant, and the help of school; Ros. Come on then; wear the favors most in sight. And wit's own grace to grace a learned fool.
Kath. But, in this changing, what is your intent? Ros. The blood of youth burns not with such Prin. The effect of my intent is to cross theirs: excess,
They do it but in mocking merriment; As gravity's revolt to wantonness.
And mock for mock is only my intent.
With visages display'd, to talk, and greet.
Ros. But shall we dance, if they desire us to't?
Prin. No: to the death, we will not move a foot, Prin. Here comes Boyet, and mirth is in his face. Nor to their penn'd speech render we no grace; Boyet. 0, I am stabb'd with laughter! Where's But, while 'tis spoke, each turn away her face. her grace?
Boyet. Why, that contempt will kill the speaker's Prin. Thy news, Boyet ?
Prepare, madam, prepare !- And quite divorce his memory from his part. Arm, wenches, arm! encounters mounted are Prin. Therefore I do it; and I make no doubt Against your peace: Love doth approach disguis’d, The rest will ne'er come in, if he be out. Amed in arguments; you'll be surprisid: There's no such sport, as sport by sport o'erthrown; Muster your wits; stand in your own defence; To make theirs ours, and ours none but our own: Or hide your heads like cowards, and fly hence. So shall we stay, mocking intended game;
Prin. Saint Denis to saint Cupid! What are they, And they, well mock’d, depart away with shame. That charge their breath against us ? say, scout, say.
[Trumpets sound within. Boyet. Under the cool shade of a sycamore, Boyet. The trumpet sounds; be mask'd, the I thought to close mine eyes some half an hour:
[The Ladies mask. When, lo! to interrupt my purpos'd rest,
Enter the King, Biron, LONGAVILLE, and DoToward that shade I might behold addrest The king and his companions: warily
MAIN, in Russian habits, and masked; Motu,
Musicians, and Attendants.
Moth. All hail, the richest beauties on the earth!
Moth. A holy parcel of the fairest dames, That well by heart hath conn'd his embassage:
[The Ladies turn their backs to him. Action, and accent, did they teach him there; That ever turn'd their backs—to mortal views! Thus must thou speak, and thus thy body bear: Biron. Their eyes, villain, their eyes. And ever and anon they made a doubt,
Moth. That ever turn'd their eyes to mortal Presence majestical would put him out;
views! OutFor, quoth the king, an angel shalt thou see; Boyet. True; out, indeed. Yet fear not thou, but speak audaciously.
Moth. Out of your favors, heavenly spirits, The boy reply'd, An angel is not edil;
vouchsafe, I should huve feard her, had she been a devil. Not to behold With that all laugh'd, and clapp'd him on the
Biron. Once to behold, rogue. shoulder;
Moth. Once to behold with your sun-beamed eyes, Making the bold wag by their praises bolder.
sun-beamed eyesOne rubb’d his elbow, thus; and fleer'd, and swore, Boyet. They will not answer to that epithet; A better speech was never spoke before:
You were best call it, daughter-beamed eyes. Another with his finger and his thumb,
Moth. They do not mark ine, and that brings me Cry'd, Via! we will do 't,come what will come:
out. The third he caper'd, and cried, All goes well: Biron. Is this your perfectness? begone, you rogue. The fourth turn'd on the toe, and down he fell. Ros. What would these strangers ? know their With that they all did tumble on the ground,
minds, Boyet: With such a zealous laughter, so profound, If they do speak our language, 'tis our will
Please it you,
That some plain man recount their purposes: Metheglin, wort, and malmsey ;-Well run, dice. Know what they would.
There's half a dozen sweets. Boyet. What would you with the princess ? Prin.
Seventh sweet, adieu! Biron. Nothing but peace and gentle visitation. Since you can cog," I'll play no more with you. Ros. What would they, say they ?
Biron. One word in secret. Boyet. Nothing but peace, and gentle visitation. Prin.
Let it not be sweet. Ros. Why, that they have; and bid them so begone. Biron. Thou griev'st my gall. Boyet. She says, you have it, and you may be gone. Prin.
Gall? bitter. King. Say to her, we have measur'd many miles Biron.
Therefore meet. To tread a measure with her on this grass.
[They converse apart. Boyet. They say that they have measur'd many Dum. Will you vouchsafe with me to change a a mile,
word? To tread a measure with you on this grass.
Mar. Name it. Ros. It is not so: ask them how many inches Dum.
Fair lady,Is in one mile: if they have measur'd many,
Say you so ? Fair lord, The measure then of one is casily told.
Take that for your fair lady.
[They converse apart. Biron. Tell her, we measure them by weary steps. Kath. What, was your visor made without a Boyet. She hears herself.
tongue ? Ros.
How many weary steps, Long. I know the reason, lady, why you ask. Of many weary miles you have o'ergone,
Kath. O, for your reason! quickly, sir; I long. Are number'd in the travel of one mile?
Long. You have a double tongue within your Biron. We number nothing that we spend for
And would afford my speechless visor half. Our duty is so rich, so infinite,
Kath. Veal, quoth the Dutchman ;-Is not veal That we may do it still without accompt.
a calf? Vouchsafe to show the sunshine of your face, Long. A calf, fair lady? That we, like savages, may worship it.
No, a fair lord calf. Ros. My face is but a moon, and clouded too. Long. Let's part the word. King. Blessed are clouds, to do as such clouds do! Kath.
No, I'll not be your half. Vouchsafe, bright moon, and these thy stars, to shine Take all, and wean it; it may prove an ox. (Those clouds remov'd) upon our wat’ry eyne. Long. Look, how you butt yourself in these Ros. O vain petitioner! beg a greater matter;
sharp mocks! Thou now request'st but moonshine in the water. Will you give horns, chaste lady? do not so. King. Then, in our measure do but vouchsafe Kath. Then die a calf, before your horns do grow. one change;
Long. One word in private with you, ere I die. Thou bid'st me beg; this begging is not strange. Kath. Bleat softly then, the butcher hears you Ros. Play, music, then: nay, you must do it
[They converse apart. [Music plays. Boyet. The tongues of mocking wenches are as Not yet;—no dance:—thus change I like the moon.
keen King. Will you not dance ? How come you thus As is the razor's edge invisible, estrang'd ?
Cutting a smaller hair than may be seen; Ros. You took the moon at full; but now she's Above the sense of sense : so sensible chang’d.
Seemeth their conference; their conceits have wings, King. Yet still she is the moon, and I the man. Fleeter than arrows, bullets, wind, thought, swifter The music plays; vouchsafe some motion to it.
things. Ros. Our ears vouchsafe it.
Ros. Not one word more, my maids ; break off
, King But your legs should do it.
break off. Ros. Since you are strangers and come here by Biron. By heaven, all dry-beaten with pure scoff
King. Farewell, mad wenches; you have simple We'll not be nice: take hands ;-we will not dance.
wits. [Exeunt King, Lords, Mota, King. Why take we hands then?
Music, and Attendants. Ros.
Only to part friends: Prin. Twenty adieus, my frozen Muscovites.Court'sy, sweet hearts; and so the measure ends. Are these the breed of wits so wonder'd at?
King. More measure of this measure; be not nice. Boyet. Tapers they are, with your sweet breaths Ros. We can afford no more at such a price.
puff'd out. King. Prize you yourselves; What buys your Ros. Well-liking wits they have: gross, gross ; company?
fat, fat. Ros. Your absence only.
Prin. O poferty in wit, kingly-poor flout! King.
That can never be. Will they not, think you, hang themselves to-night? Ros. Then cannot we be bought: and so adieu; Or ever, but in visors, show their faces ? Twice to your visor, and half once to you! This pert Birón was out of countenance quite.
King. If you deny to dance, let's hold more chat. Ros. O! they were all in lamentable cases! Ros. In private then.
The king was weeping-ripe for a good word. King
I am best pleas'd with that. Prin. Birón did swear himself out of all suit.
[They converse apart. Mar. Dumain was at my service, and his sword: Biron. White-handed mistress, one sweet word No point,' quoth I; my servant straight was mute
. with thee.
Kath. Lord Longaville said, I came o'er his heart; Prin. Honey, and milk, and sugar; there is three. And trow you, what he call’d me? Biron. Nay then, two treys, (an if you grow so - Falsify dice, lie. nice,)
: A quibble on the French adverb of negation.
Qualm, perhaps. | Enter the Princess, ushered by Boret; RosaKath. Yes, in good faith.
LINE, MARIA, KATHARINE, and Attendants. Prin.
Go, sickness as thou art! Biron. See where it comes !-Behavior, what Ros. Well, better wits have worn plain statute
wert thou, caps.
Till this man show'd thee? and what art thou now? But will you hear? the king is my love sworn. King. All hail, sweet madam, and fair time of day!
Prin. And quick Birón hath plighted faith to me. Prin. Fair, in all hail, is foul, as I conceive. Kath. And Longaville was for my service born. King. Construe my speeches better, if you may. Mar. Dumain is mine, as sure as bark on tree. Prin. Then wish me better, I will give you leave.
Boyet. Madam, and pretty mistresses, give ear: King. We came to visit you; and purpose now Immediately they will again be here
To lead you to our court : vouchsafe it then. In their own shapes; for it can never be,
Prin. This field shall hold me; and so hold your They will digest tbis harsh indignity. Prin. Will they return?
Nor God, nor I, delight in perjur'd men. Boyet. They will, they will, God knows; King. Rebuke me not for that which you provoke; And leap for joy, though they are lame with blows: The virtue of your eye must break my oath. Therefore, change favors;' and when they repair, Prin. You nick-name virtue: vice you should Blow like sweet roses in this summer air.
have spoke; Prin. How blow? how blow? speak to be un For virtue's office never breaks men's troth. derstood.
Now by my maiden honor, yet as pure Boyet. Fair ladies, mask'd, are roses in their bud: As the unsullied lily, I protest, Dismask'd, their damask sweet commixture shown, A world of torments though I should endure, Are angels vailing clouds, or roses blown.
I would not yield to be your house's guest: Prin. Avaunt, perplexity! What shall we do, So much I hate a breaking-cause to be If they return in their own shapes to woo ? Of heavenly oaths, vow'd with integrity.
Ros. Good madam, if by me you'll be advis'd, King. O, you have liv'd in desolation here, Let's mock them still, as well known, as disguis'd: Unseen, unvisited, much to our shame. Let us complain to them what fools were here, Prin. Not so, my lord; it is not so, I swear; Disguis'd like Muscovites, in shapeless gear;
We have had pastimes here, and pleasant game; And wonder what they were ; and to what end A mess of Russians left us but of late. Their shallow shows, and prologue vilely penn'd, King. How, madam? Russians ? And their rough carriage so ridiculous,
Ay, in truth, my lord; Should be presented at our tent to us.
Trim gallants, full of courtship, and of state. Boyet. Ladies, withdraw; the gallants are at hand. Ros. Madam, speak true:- It is not so, my lord; Prin. Whip to our tents, as roes run over land. My lady. (to the manner of the days,")
[Eceunt Princess, Ros., Kath., and Maria. In courtesy, gives undeserving praise.
In Russian habit: here they stay'd an hour.
And talk'd apace; and in that hour, my lord, King. Fair sir, God save you! Where is the They did not bless us with one happy word. princess ?
I dare not call them fools; but this I think, Boyet. Gone to her tent: Please it your majesty, When they are thirsty, fools would fain have drink. Command me any service to her thither?
Biron. This jest is dry to me--Fair, gentle, King. That she vouchsafe me audience for one
Your wit makes wise things foolish ; when we greet Boyet. I will; and so will she, I know, my lord. With eyes best seeing heaven's fiery eye,
[Exit. By light we lose light: Your capacity Biron. This fellow pecks up wit, as pigeons peas; Is of that nature, that to your huge store And utters it again when God doth please: Wise things seem foolish, and rich things but poor. He is wit's pedlar; and retails his wares
Ros. This proves you wise and rich; for in my At wakes and wassels. meetings, markets, fairs;
eye, And we that sell by gross, the Lord doth know, Biron. I am a fool, and full of poverty. Have not the grace to grace it with such show. Ros. But that you take what doth to you belong, This gallant pins the wenches on his sleeve; It were a fault to snatch words from my tongue. Had he been Adam, he had tempted Eve:
Biron. O, I am yours, and all that I possess. He can carve too, and lisp: Why, this is he,
Ros. All the fool mine? That kiss'd away his hand in courtesy;.
I cannot give you less. This is the ape of form, monsieur the nice,
Ros. Which of the visors was it that you wore ? That, when he plays at tables, chides the dice Biron. Where? when? what visor? why deIn honorable terms; nay, he can sing,
mand you this? A mean' most meanly; and, in ushering,
Ros. There, then, that visor; that superfluous case, Mend him who can: the ladies call him, sweet; That hid the worse, and show'd the better face. The stairs, as he treads on them, kiss his feet: King. We are descried: they'll mock us now This is the flower that smiles on every one,
downright. To show his teeth as white as whales' bone :* Dum. Let us confess, and turn it to a jest. And consciences, that will not die in debt,
Prin. Amaz’d, my lord? Why looks your highPay him the due of honey-tongued Boyet.
ness sad? King. A blister on his sweet tongue, with my Ros. Help, hold his brows! he'll swoon! Why heart,
look you pale ? That put Armado's page out of his part!
Sea-sick, I think, coming from Muscovy. • Better wits may be found among citizens.
Biron. Thus pour the stars down plagues for • Features, countenances. 6 Rustic merry-meetings.
perjury. * The tenor in music. The tooth of the horse-whale.
After the fashion of the times.