human nature-and corrupteth the soul with evil longings. Mrs. Lov. And pray who corrupted your son Tobias with evil longings? Your maid Tabitha wore a handkerchief, and yet he made the saint a sinner. Mrs. Pr. Well, well, spit thy malice. I confess Satan did buffet my son Tobias, and my servant Tabitha; the evil spirit was at that time too strong, and they both became subject to its workings, not from any outward provocation, but from an inward call ; he was not tainted with the rottenness of the fashions, nor did his eyes take in the drunkenness of beauty. Mrs. Lov. No! that's plainly to be seen. Mrs. Pr. Tabitha is one of the faithful; he fell not with a stranger. Mrs. Lov. So! Then you hold wenching no crime, provided it be within the pale of your own tribe.You are an excellent casuist, truly. Enter OBADIAH PRIM. Ob. Pr. Not stripp'd of thy vanity, yet, Anne!Why dost thou not make her put it off, Sarah? Mrs. Pr. She will not do it. Ob. Pr. Verily, thy naked breasts troubleth my outward man; I pray thee hide 'em, Anne: put on an handkerchief, Anne Lovely. Mrs. Lov. I hate handkerchiefs when 'tis not cold weather, Mr. Prim. Mrs. Pr. I have seen thee wear a handkerchief; nay, and a mask to boot, in the middle of July. Mrs. Lov. Ay, to keep the sun from scorching me. Ob. Pr. If thou couldst not bear the sun-beams, how dost thou think man can bear thy beams Those breasts inflame desire; let them be hid, I say. Mrs. Lov. Let me be quiet, I say. -Must I be tormented thus for ever? Sure no woman's condition ever equalled mine! Foppery, folly, avarice and hypocrisy, are, by turns, my constant companions,-and I must vary shapes as often as a player---I cannot think my father meant this tyranny! No, you usurp an authority which he never intended you should take. Ob. Pr. Hark thee, dost thou call good counsel tyranny? Do I, or my wife, tyrannize, when we desire thee in all love to put off thy tempting attire, and veil thy provokers to sin? Mrs. Lov. Deliver me, good Heaven! or I shall go [Walks about. distracted. Mrs. Pr. So! now thy pinners are tost, and thy breasts pulled up!-Verily, they were seen enough before. Fie upon the filthy taylor who made thy stays. Mrs. Lov. I wish I were in my gravel Kill me ra. ther than treat me thus. Ob. Pr. Kill thee! ha, ha! thou thinkest thou art acting some lewd play sure: -kill thee! Art thou prepared for death, Anne Lovely? No, no, thou wouldst rather have a husband, Anne:-thou wantest a gilt coach, with six lazy fellows behind, to flaunt it in the ring of vanity, among the princes and rulers of the : land-who pamper themselves with the fatness thereof; but I will take care that none shall squander away thy father's estate: thou shalt marry none such, Anne. Mrs. Lov. Wou'd you marry me to one of your own canting sect? Ob. Pr. Yea, verily, no one else shall ever get my consent, I do assure thee, Anne. Mrs. Lov. And I do assure thee, Obadiah, that I will as soon turn papist, and die in a convent. Mrs. Pr. Oh wickedness! Mrs. Lov. Oh stupidity! Ob. Pr. Oh blindness of heart! Mrs. Lov. Thou blinder of the world, don't provoke me,-lest I betray your sanctity, and leave your wife to judge of your purity: What were the emotions of your spirit-when you squeez'd Mary by the hand last night in the pantry, when she told you, you buss'd so filthily? Ah! you had no aversion to naked bosoms, when you begged her to shew you a little, little, little bit of her delicious bubby: -don' you remember those words, Mr. Prim? Mrs. Pr. What does she say, Obadiah? Ob. Pr. She talketh unintelligibly, Sarah. Which way did she hear this? This should not have reach'd the ears of the wicked ones: -verily, it troubleth me. Enter Servant. [Aside. Serv. Philip Modelove, whom they call Sir Phi D lip, is below, and such another with him; shall I send them up ? Ob. Pr. Yea. [Exit. Enter Sir PHILIP and Colonel. Sir Phil. How dost thou do, friend Prim? Odsol my she-friend here too! What, are you documenting Miss Nancy; reading her a lecture upon the pinch'd coif, I warrant ye. Mrs. Pr. I am sure thou didst never read her any lecture that was good. - My flesh riseth so at these wicked ones, that prudence adviseth me to withdraw [Exit. from their sight. Col. Oh! that I could find means to speak with her! How charming she appears! I wish I could get this letter into her hand. [Aside. Sir Phil. Well, Miss Cockey, I hope thou hast got the better of them. Mrs. Lov. The difficulties of my life are not to be surmounted, Sir Philip. I hate the impertinence of him as much as the stupidity of the other. [Aside. Ob. Pr. Verily, Philip, thou wilt spoil this maiden. Sir Phil. I find we still differ in opinion; but that we may none of us spoil her, pr'ythee, Prim, let us consent to marry her.-I have sent for our brother guardians to meet me here about this very thing-Madam, will you give me leave to recommend a husband to you-Here's a gentleman, whom, in my mind, you can have no objection to. [Presents the Colonel to her, she looks another way. Mrs. Lov. Heaven deliver me from the formal, and the fantastic fool! Col. A fine woman, --a fine horse, and fine equipage, are the finest things in the universe: and if I am so happy to possess you, madam, I shall become the envy of mankind, as much as you outshine your whole sex. [As he takes her hand to kiss it, he endeavours to put a letter into it; she lets it drop-Prim takes it up. Mrs. Lov. I have no ambition to appear conspi cuously ridiculous, sir. [Turning from him. Col. So fail the hopes of Fainwell. Mrs. Lov. Hal Fainwell! 'Tis he! What have I done? Prim has the letter, and it will be discover'd. [Aside. Ob. Pr. Friend, I know not thy name, so cannot call thee by it; but thou seest thy letter is unwelcome to the maiden, she will not read it. Mrs. Lov. Nor shall you; [Snatches the letter.] I'll tear it in a thousand pieces, and scatter it, as I will the hopes of all those that any of you shall recommend to me. [Tears the letter. Sir Phil. Ha! Right woman, faith ! Col. Excellent woman! [Aside. Ob. Pr. Friend, thy garb savoureth too much of the vanity of the age for my approbation; nothing that resembleth Philip Modelove shall I love, mark that; therefore, friend Philip, bring no more of thy own apes under my roof. Sir Phil. I am so entirely a stranger to the mon |