Val. My ears are stopp'd, and cannot hear good news, is much in a bare Christian. Here is the cat-log [pullSo much of bad already hath possess'd them. Pre. That thou art banish'd, O, that's the news; Frum hence, from Silvia, and from me thy friend. Fal. O, I have fed upon this woe already, And now excess of it will make me surfeit. Doth Silvia know that I am banish'd? Pro. Ay, ay; and she hath offer'd to the doom, (Which, unrevers'd, stands in effectual force,) A sea of melting pearl, which some call tears : Those at her father's churlish feet she tender'd; With them, upon her knees, her humble self; Wringing her hands, whose whiteness so became them As if but now they waxed pale for woe: But neither bended knees, pure hands held up, Sad sighs, deep groans, nor silver-shedding tears, Could penetrate her uncompassionate sire; But Valentine, if he be ta'en, must die. Besides, her intercession chaf'd hin so, When she for thy repeal was suppliant, That to close prison he commanded her, With many bitter threats of 'biding there. Val. No more; unless the next word that thou speak'st, Have some malignant power upon my life: If so, I pray thee, breathe it in mine ear, As ending anthem of my endless dolour. Pra. Cease to lament for that thou canst not help, And study help for that which thou lament'st. Time is the nurse and breeder of all good. Fel. I pray thee, Launce, an if thou seest my boy, Bid him make haste, and meet me at the north-gate. Pra. Go, sirrah, find him out. Come, Valentine. Vel. O my dear Silvia! hapless Valentine! [Exeunt Val. and Pro. Lawn. I am but a fool, look you; and yet I have the wit to think, my master is a kind of a knave: but that's all one, if he be but one knave. He lives not now, that knows me to be in love: yet I am in love; but a team of horse shall not pluck that from me; nor who 'tis I love, and yet 'tis a woman: but that woman, I will not tell myself; and yet 'tis a milk-maid: yet 'tis not a maid, for she hath had gossips: yet 'tis a maid, for she is her master's maid, and serves for wages. She hath more qualities than a water-spaniel, which ing out a paper] of her conditions. Imprimis, She can fetch and carry. Why, a horse can do no more; nay, a horse cannot fetch, but only carry; therefore, is she better than a jade. Item, She can milk; look you, a sweet virtue in a maid with clean hands. Enter Speed. Speed. How now, siguior Launce? what news with your mastership? Laun. With my master's ship? why, it is at sea. Speed. Well, your old vice still; mistake the word: What news then in your paper? Laun. The blackest news that ever thou heard'st. Speed. Why, man, how black? Laun. Why, as black as ink. Speed. Let me read them. Laun. Fie on thee, jolt-head; thou canst not read. Speed. Thou liest, I can. Laun. I will try thee: Tell me this: Who begot thee? Speed. Marry, the son of my grandfather. Laun. O illiterate loiterer! it was the son of thy grandmother: this proves, that thou canst not read. Speed. Come, fool, come: try me in thy paper. Laun. There; and St. Nicholas be thy speed. Speed. Imprimis, She can milk. Laun. Ay, that she can. Speed. Item, She brews good ale. Laun. And thereof comes the proverb, Blessing of your heart, you brew good ale. Speed. Item, She can sew. Laun. That's as much as to say, Can she so? Speed. Item, She can knit. Laun. What need a man care for a stock with a wench, when she can knit him a stock? Speed. Item, She can wash and scour. Laun. A special virtue; for then she need not be washed and seoured. Speed. Item, She can spin. Laun. Then may I set the world on wheels, when she can spin for her living. Speed. Item, She hath many nameless virtues. Laun. That's as much as to say, Bastard virtues; that, indeed, know not their father's, and therefore have Speed. Item, She is slow in words. Laun. O villain, that set this down among her vices! To be slow in words, is a woman's only virtue: I pray thee, out with't; and place it for her chief virtue. Speed. Item, She is proud. Laun. Out with that too; it was Eve's legacy, and cannot be ta'en from her. Speed. Item, She hath no teeth. Laun. I care not for that neither, because I love crusts. Speed. Item, She is curst. Laun. Well; the best is, she hath no teeth to bite. Speed. Item, She will often praise her liquor. Laun. If her liquor be good, she shall: if she will || What might we do, to make the girl forget not, I will; for good things should be praised. Speed. Item, She is too liberal. Laun. Of her tongue she cannot; for that's writ down she is slow of: of her purse she shall not; for that I'll keep shut: now, of another thing she may; and that I cannot help. Well, proceed. Speed. Item, She hath more hair than wit, and more faults than hairs, and more wealth than faults. Laun. Stop there; I'll have her: she was mine, and not mine, twice or thrice in that last article: Re hearse that once more. Speed. Item, She hath more hair than wit, Laun. More hair than wit, it may be; I'll prove it: The cover of the salt hides the salt, and therefore it is more than the salt; the hair, that covers the wit, is more than the wit; for the greater hides the less. What's next? Speed. And more faults than hairs, Laun. That's monstrous: O, that that were out! Laun. Why, that word makes the faults gracious: Well, I'll have her: And if it be a match, as nothing is impossible, Speed. What then? Laun. Why, then I will tell thee,-that thy master stays for thee at the north gate. Speed. For me? Laun. For thee? ay; who art thou? he hath staid for a better man than thee. Speed. And must I go to him? Laun. Thou must run to him, for thou hast staid so long, that going will scarce serve the turn. Speed. Why didst not tell me sooner? 'pox of your love-letters! [Evit. Laun. Now will he be swinged for reading my letter: An unmannerly slave, that will thrust himself into secrets!-I'll after, to rejoice in the boy's correction. [Exit. SCENE II-The same. A room in the Duke's palace. Enter Duke and Thurio; Proteus behind. Duke. Sir Thurio, fear not, but that she will love you, Now Valentine is banish'd from her sight. Thu. Since his exile she hath despis'd me most, Duke. This weak impress of love is as a figure Pro. Gone, my good lord. Duke. My daughter takes his going grievously. Proteus, the good conceit I hold of thee, Pro. Longer than I prove loyal to your grace, Duke. Thou know'st, how willingly I would effect The match between sir Thurio and my daughter. Pro. I do, my lord. Duke. And also, I think, thou art not ignorant Pro. She did, my lord, when Valentine was here. The love of Valentine, and love sir Thurio? Pro. Ay, if his enemy deliver it: 'Tis an ill office for a gentleman; Duke. Where your good word cannot advantage him, Your slander never can endamage him; Pro. You have prevail'd, my lord: if I can do it, Thu. Therefore, as you unwind her love from him, Lest it should ravel, and be good to none, Duke. And, Proteus, we dare trust you in this kind: And cannot soon revolt and change your mind. Pro. As much as I can do, I will effect :- Pro. Say, that upon the altar of her beauty Visit by night your lady's chamber-window, Duke. This discipline shows thou hast been in love. To sort some gentlemen well skill'd in music : Duke. About it, gentlemen. Pro. We'll wait upon your grace till after supper And afterward determine our proceedings. Duke. Even now about it; I will pardon you. [Er 3 Out. What say'st thou? wilt thou be of our consort? Say, ay, and be the captain of us all : We'll do thee homage, and be rul'd by thee, ACT IV. SCENE I-A Forest, near Mantua. Enter certain Outlaws. 1 Outlaw. FELLOWS, stand fast; I see a passenger. Are you content to be our general ? And live, as we do, in this wilderness ? 2 Out. If there be ten, shrink not, but down with 'em. Love thee as our commander, and our king. Enter Valentine and Speed. 3 Out. Stand, sir, and throw us that you have about you; If not, we'll make you sit, and rifle you. Speed. Sir, we are undone! these are the villains That all the travellers do fear so much. Fal. My friends, 1 Out. That's not so, sir; we are your enemies. 2 Out. Peace; we'll hear him. 3 Out. Ay, by my beard, will we; For he's a proper man. Fal. Then know, that I have little wealth to lose; A man I am, cross'd with adversity: My riches are these poor habiliments, Of which, if you should here disfurnish me, You take the sum and substance that I have. 2 Out. Whither travel you? Val. To Verona. 1 Ow. Whence came you? Vel. From Milan. 3 Out. Have you long sojourn'd there? Fal. Some sixteen months; and longer might have staid, If crooked fortune had not thwarted me. 1 Out. What, were you banish'd thence ? Val. I was. 2 Out. For what offence? Val. For that which now torments me to rehearse: I kill'd a man, whose death I much repent; But yet I slew him manfully in fight, Without false vantage, or base treachery. 1 Out. Why ne'er repent it, if it were done so : But were you banish'd for so small a fault? Val. I was, and held me glad of such a doom. 1 Out. Have you the tongues? Val. My youthful travel therein made me happy ; Or else I often had been miserable. 3 Out. By the bare sealp of Robin Hood's fat friar, This fellow were a king for our wild faction. 1 Out. We'll have him: sirs, a word, Speed. Master, be one of them; It is an honourable kind of thievery. Fal. Peace, villain! 2 Out. Tell us this: Have you any thing to take to? Fel. Nothing, but my fortune. 3 Out. Know then, that some of us are gentlemen, Such as the fury of ungovern'd youth An heir, and near allied unto the duke, 2 Out. And I from Mantua, for a gentleman, Whom, in my mood, I stabb'd unto the heart. 1 Out. And I, for such like petty crimes as these. But to the purpose,-(for we cite our faults, That they may hold exeus'd our lawless lives,) And, partly, seeing you are beautify'd With goodly shape; and by your own report A linguist; and a man of such perfection, As we do in our quality much want ; 2 Out. Indeed, because you are a banish'd man, Derefore, above the rest, we parley to you: 1 Out. But if thou scorn our courtesy, thou dy'st. 2 Out. Thou shalt not live to brag what we have offer'd. Val. I take your offer, and will live with you; Provided that you do no outrages On silly women, or poor passengers. 3 Out. No, we detest such vile, base practices. Come, go with us, we'll bring thee to our crews, And shew thee all the treasure we have got; Which, with ourselves, all rest at thy dispose. [Exe. SCENE II-Milan. Court of the Palace. Enter Proteus. Pro. Already have I been false to Valentine, And now I must be as unjust to Thurio. Enter Thurio, and Musicians. Thu. How now, sir Proteus? are you crept before us? Pro. Ay, gentle Thurio; for, you know, that love Will ereep in service where it dare not go. Thu. Ay, but, I hope, sir, that you love not here. Thu. Whom? Silvia? Pro. Ay, Silvia, for your sake. Thu. I thank you for your own.-Now, gentlemen, Let's tune, and to it lustily a while. Enter Host at a distance; and Julia in boy's clothes. Host. Now, my young guest, methinks you're allycholly; I pray you, why is it? Jul. Marry, mine host, because I cannot be merry. Host. Come, we'll have you merry: I'll bring you where you shall hear music, and see the gentleman that you ask'd for. Jul. But shall I hear him speak? Host. Ay, that you shall. Jul. That will be music, Host. Hark! hark! Jul. Is he among these? Host. Ay: but peace, let's hear 'em. SONG. Who is Silvia? what is she, [Music plays. That all our swains commend her? Holy, fair, and wise is she; The heavens such grace did lend her, That she might admired be. Is she kind, as she is fair? For beauty lives with kindness: Love doth to her eyes repair, To wrong him with thy importunacy? Pro. I likewise hear, that Valentine is dead. Sil. And so, suppose, am I; for in his grave, To help him of his blindness: And, being help'd, inhabits there. Then to Silvia let us sing, That Silvia is excelling; She excels each mortal thing, Upon the dull earth dwelling: To her let us garlands bring. Host. How now? are you sadder than you were before? How do you, man? the music likes you not. Jul. You mistake; the musician likes me not. Jul. He plays false, father. Host. How? out of tune on the strings? Jul. Not so; but yet so false that he grieves my very heart-strings. Host. You have a quick ear. Jul. Ay, I would I were deaf! it makes me have a slow heart. Host. I perceive, you delight not in music. Jul. Not a whit, when it jars so. Host. Hark, what fine change is in the music ! Jul. Ay: that change is the spite. Host. You would have them always play but one thing. Jul. I would always have one play but one thing. But, host, doth this sir Proteus, that we talk on, Often resort unto this gentlewoman? Assure thyself, my love is buried. Pro. Sweet lady, let me rake it from the earth. Or, at the least, in her's sepulchre thine. Pro. Madam, if your heart be so obdurate, And to your shadow I will make true love. [Aside. Jul. If 'twere a substance, you would, sure, deceive it, And make it but a shadow, as I am. [Aside. Sil. I am very loth to be your idol, sir; But, since your falsehood shall become you well To worship shadows, and adore false shapes, Send to me in the morning, and I'll send it : Host. I'll tell you what Launce, his man, told me, he almost day. loved her out of all nick. Jul. Where is Launce? Host. Gone to seek his dog; which, to-morrow, by his master's command, he must carry for a present to his lady. Jul. Peace! stand aside! the company parts. That you shall say, my cunning drift excels. Thu. Where meet we? Pro. At saint Gregory's well. Thu. Farewell. [Exe. Thurio and Musicians. Silvia appears above, at her window. Pro. Madam, good even to your ladyship. Who is that, that spake ? Pro. One, lady, if you knew his pure heart's truth, You'd quickly learn to know him by his voice. Sil. Sir Proteus, as I take it. Pro. Sir Proteus, gentle lady, and your servant. Sil. What is your will? Pro. That I may compass yours. Sil. You have your wish; my will is even this, That presently you hie you home to bed. That hast deceived so many with thy vows? Pro. I grant, sweet love, that I did love a lady; Jul. Not so; but it hath been the longest night That e'er I watch'd, and the most heaviest. [Exeunt. SCENE III-The same. Enter Eglamour. Egl. This is the hour that madam Silvia Entreated me to call, and know her mind; There's some great matter she'd employ me in.Madam, madam! Silvia appears above at her window. Sil. Who calls? Egl. Your servant, and your friend; One that attends your ladyship's command. Sil. Sir Eglamour, a thousand times good morrow. According to your ladyship's impose, Sil. O Eglamour, thou art a gentleman, To Mantua, where, I hear, he makes abode; SCENE IV-The same. Enter Launce, with his dog. Loun. When a man's servant shall play the cur with him, look you, it goes hard: one that I brought up of a puppy; one that I saved from drowning, when three or four of his blind brothers and sisters went to it! I have taught him even as one would say precisely, Thus I would teach a dog. I was sent to deliver him, as a present to mistress Silvia, from my master; and I came no sooner into the dining-chamber, but he steps me to her trencher, and steals her capon's leg. O, 'tis a foul thing when a eur cannot keep himself in all companies! I would have, as one should say, one that takes upon him to be a dog indeed, to be, as it were, a dog at all things. If I had not had more wit than he, to take a fault upon me that he did, I think verily he had been hanged for't; sure as I live, he had suffered for't: you shall judge. He thrusts me himself into the company of three or four gentlemen-like dogs, under the duke's table: he had not been there (bless the mark) a pissing while; but all the chamber smelt him. Out with the dog, says one; What cur is that? mys another; Whip him out, says the third; Hang him ap, says the duke. I, having been acquainted with the smell before, knew it was Crab; and goes me to the fellow that whips the dogs: Friend, quoth I, you mean to whip the dog? Ay, marry, do I, quoth he. You do him the more wrong, quoth I; 'twas I did the thing you wot of. He makes me no more ado, but whips me out of the chamber. How many masters would do this for their servant? Nay, I'll be sworn, I have sat in the stocks for puddings he hath stolen, oth erwise he had been executed: I have stood on the pillory for geese he hath killed, otherwise he had suffered for't: thou think'st not of this now!-Nay, I re member the trick you served me, when I took my leave of madam Silvia; did not I bid thee still mark me, and do as I do? When didst thou see me heave up my leg and make water against a gentlewoman's farthingale? didst thou ever see me do such a trick ? Enter Proteus and Julia. Pra. Sebastian is thy name? I like thee well, And will employ thee in some service presently. Jul. In what you please ;-I will do what I can. Pro. I hope, thou wilt. How now, you whoreson peasant? [To Launce. Where have you been these two days loitering? Loun. Marry, sir, I carried mistress Silvia the dog you bade me. Pre. And what says she, to my little jewel? Loun. Marry, she says, your dog was a cur; and sells you, currish thanks is good enough for such a present. Pro. What, didst thou offer her this from me? Laun. Ay, sir; the other squirrel was stolen from me by the hangman's boys in the market-place; and then I offered her mine own; who is a dog as big as ten of yours, and therefore the gift the greater. Pro. Go, get thee hence, and find my dog again, Or ne'er return again into my sight. Away, I say: Stay'st thou to vex me here? A slave, that, still an end, turns me to shame. [Exit Launce. -Sebastian, I have entertained thee, She loved me well, deliver'd it to me. Jul. It seems, you loved her not, to leave her token: She's dead, belike. Pro. Why dost thou cry, alas? Jul. Because, methinks, that she loved you as well As you do love your lady Silvia: Pro. Well, give her that ring, and therewithal Jul. How many women would do such a message? But cannot be true servant to my master, Enter Silvia attended. -Gentlewoman, good day! I pray you, be my mean To hear me speak the message I am sent on. Jul. From my master, sir Proteus, madam. |