Touch. He, sir, that must marry this woman. Therefore, you clown, abandon,-which is in the vulgar, leave, the society,-which in the boorish is, company,-of this female,-which in the common is,-woman; which together is, abandon the society of this female, or, clown thou perishest; or, to thy better understanding, diest; or, to wit, I kill thee, make thee away, translate thy life into death, thy liberty into bondage. I will deal in poison with thee, or in bastinado, or in steel: I will bandy with thee in faction; I will o'er-run thee with policy; I will kill thee a hundred and fifty ways: therefore tremble, and depart. Aud. Do, good William. Will. God rest you merry, sir. Enter CORIN. Cor. Our master and mistress seek you: come, away, away! will bid the duke to the nuptial. But, O! how bitter a thing it is to look into happiness through another man's eyes! By so much the more shall I to-morrow be at the height of heart-heaviness, by how much I shall think my brother happy in having what he wishes for. Ros. Why then, to-morrow I cannot serve your turn for Rosalind? Orl. I can live no longer by thinking. Ros. I will weary you, then, no longer with idle talking. Know of me, then, (for now I speak to some purpose,) that I know you are a gentleman of good conceit. I speak not this, that you should bear a good opinion of my knowledge, insomuch, I [Exit. say, I know you are; neither do I labour for a greater esteem than may in some little measure draw a belief from you, to do yourself good, and not to grace me. Believe then, if you please, that I can do strange things. I have, since I was three years old, conversed with a magician, most profound in his art, and yet not damnable. If you do love Rosalind so near the heart as your gesture cries it out, when your brother marries Aliena, shall you marry her. I know into what straits of fortune she is driven; and it is not impossible to me, if it appear not inconvenient to you, to set her before your eyes to-morrow, human as she is, and without any danger. Touch. Trip, Audrey, trip, Audrey.-I attend, I [Exeunt. attend. SCENE II.-The Same. Enter ORLANDO, and OLIVER. Orl. Is't possible, that on so little acquaintance you should like her? that, but seeing, you should love her; and, loving, woo; and, wooing, she should grant? and will you persever to enjoy her? Oli. Neither call the giddiness of it in question, the poverty of her, the small acquaintance, my sudden wooing, nor her sudden consenting; but say with me, I love Aliena; say with her, that she loves me; consent with both, that we may enjoy each other: it shall be to your good; for my father's house, and all the revenue that was old sir Rowland's, will I estate upon you, and here live and die a shepherd. Orl. You have my consent. Let your wedding be to-morrow: thither will I invite the duke, and all's contented followers. Orl. It is my arm. Ros. I thought thy heart had been wounded with the claws of a lion. Orl. Wounded it is, but with the eyes of a lady. Ros. Did your brother tell you how I counterfeited to swoon, when he showed me your handkerchief? Orl. Ay, and greater wonders than that. Ros. O! I know where you are.-Nay, 'tis true: there was never any thing so sudden, but the fight of two rams, and Cæsar's thrasonical brag of "I came, saw," and "overcame:" for your brother and my sister no sooner met, but they looked; no sooner looked, but they loved; no sooner loved, but they sighed; no sooner sighed, but they asked one another the reason; no sooner knew the reason, but they sought the remedy: and in these degrees have they made a pair of stairs to marriage, which they will climb incontinent, or else be incontinent before marriage. They are in the very wrath of love, and they will together: clubs cannot part them. Orl. They shall be married to-morrow, and I Orl. Speak'st thou in sober meanings? Ros. By my life, I do; which I tender dearly, though I say I am a magician. Therefore, put you in your best array, bid your friends, for if you will be married to-morrow, you shall, and to Rosalind, if you will. Enter SILVIUS, and PHEBE. Look; here comes a lover of mine, and a lover of hers. Phe. Youth, you have done me much ungentle ness, To show the letter that I writ to you. Ros. I care not, if I have: it is my study Sil. It is to be all made of sighs and tears; Phe. And I for Ganymede. Ros. And I for no woman. Sil. It is to be all made of faith and service; And so am I for Phebe. Phe. And I for Ganymede. Orl. And I for Rosalind. Ros. And I for no woman. Sil. It is to be all made of fantasy, All made of passion, and all made of wishes; Phe. And so am I for Ganymede. Sil. If this be so, why blame you me to love you? Ros. Why do you speak, too, "why blame you me to love you? ?"" Orl. To her, that is not here, nor doth not hear. Ros. Pray you, no more of this: 'tis like the howling of Irish wolves against the moon.-I will help you,-[To SILVIUS.]-if I can:-I would love you,-[To PHEBE.]-if I could.-To-morrow meet me all together.-I will marry you,-[To PнE.] if ever I marry woman, and I'll be married to-morrow:-I will satisfy you,-[To ORLANDO.]-if ever I satisfied man, and you shall be married to-morrow:-I will content you,-[ To SILVIUS.]—if what pleases you contents you, and you shall be married to-morrow. As you-[To ORLANDO.]-love Rosalind, meet;-as you-[To SILVIUS.]-love Phebe, meet; and as I love no woman, I'll meet.-So, fare you well: I have left you commands. Sil. I'll not fail, if I live. SCENE III.-The Same. Enter TOUCHSTONE, and AUDREY. Touch. To-morrow is the joyful day, Audrey: to-morrow will we be married. Aud. I do désire it with all my heart, and I hope it is no dishonest desire, to desire to be a woman of the world. Here come two of the banished duke's pages. Enter two Pages. 1 Page. Well met, honest gentleman. Touch. By my troth, well met. Come, sit; sit, and a song. 2 Page. We are for you: sit i'the middle. 1 Page. Shall we clap into't roundly, without hawking, or spitting, or saying we are hoarse, which are the only prologues to a bad voice? 2 Page. I'faith, i'faith; and both in a tune, like [Exeunt. two gypsies on a horse. SCENE IV. Another part of the Forest. Enter DUKE Senior, AMIENS, JAQUES, ORLANDO, OLIVER, and CELIA. Duke S. Dost thou believe, Orlando, that the boy Can do all this that he hath promised? Orl. I sometimes do believe, and sometimes do not, As those that fear; they hope, and know they fear. Enter ROSALIND, SILVIUS, and PHEBE. Ros. Patience once more, whiles our compact is urg'd. To Duke S.] You say, if I bring in your Rosalind, You will bestow her on Orlando here? Duke S. That would I, had I kingdoms to give with her. Ros. [To ORLANDO.] And you say, you will have her, when I bring her? Orl. That would I, were I of all kingdoms king. Ros. [To PHEBE.] You say, you'll marry me, if I be willing? Phe. That will I, should I die the hour after. Ros. But if you do refuse to marry me, You'll give yourself to this most faithful shepherd? Phe. So is the bargain. Ros. [To SILVIUS.] You say, that you'll have Phebe, if she will? Sil. Though to have her and death were both one thing. Ros. I have promis'd to make all this matter even. Keep you your word, O duke! to give your daugh ter; You yours, Orlando, to receive his daughter:-- [Exeunt ROSALIND, and CELIA. Enter TOUCHSTONE, and AUDREY. Jaq. There is, sure, another flood toward, and these couples are coming to the ark. Here comes a pair of very strange beasts, which in all tongues are called fools. Touch. Salutation and greeting to you all. Jaq. Good my lord, bid him welcome. This is the motley-minded gentleman, that I have so often met in the forest: he hath been a courtier, he swears. Touch. If any man doubt that, let him put me to my purgation. I have trod a measure; I have flattered a lady; I have been politic with my friend, smooth with mine enemy; I have undone three tailors; I have had four quarrels, and like to have fought one. Jaq. And how was that ta'en up? will. Rich honesty dwells like a miser, sir, in a poor-house, as your pearl in your foul oyster. Duke S. By my faith, he is very swift and sen tentious. Touch. According to the fool's bolt, sir, and such dulcet diseases. Jaq. But, for the seventh cause; how did you find the quarrel on the seventh cause? Touch. Upon a lie seven times removed.-Bear your body more seeming, Audrey.-As thus, sir. I did dislike the cut of a certain courtier's beard: he sent me word, if I said his beard was not cut well, he was in the mind it was: this is called the "retort courteous." If I sent him word again, it was not well cut, he would send me word, he cut it to please himself: this is called the "quip modest." If again, it was not well cut, he disabled my judgment: this is called the "reply churlish." If again, it was not well cut, he would answer, I spake not true: this is called the "reproof valiant." If again, it was not well cut, he would say, I lie: this is called the "countercheck quarrelsome:" and so to the "lie circumstantial," and the "lie direct." Jaq. And how oft did you say, his beard was not well cut? Touch. I durst go no further than the "lie circumstantial," nor he durst not give me the "lie direct;" and so we measured swords, and parted. Jaq. Can you nominate in order now the degrees of the lie? Touch. O sir, we quarrel in print, by the book, as you have books for good manners: I will name you the degrees. The first, the retort courteous; the second, the quip modest; the third, the reply churlish; the fourth, the reproof valiant; the fifth, the countercheck quarrelsome; the sixth, the lie, with circumstance; the seventh, the lie direct. All these you may avoid, but the lie direct; and you may avoid that too, with an if. I knew when seven justices could not take up a quarrel; but when the parties were met themselves, one of them thought but of an if, as If you said so, then I said so; and they shook hands and swore brothers. Your if is the only peace-maker; much virtue in if. Jaq. Is not this a rare fellow, my lord? he's as good at any thing, and yet a fool. Duke S. He uses his folly like a stalking-horse, and under the presentation of that, he shoots his wit. Enter HYMEN, leading ROSALIND, and CELIA. Still Music. Hym. Then is there mirth in heaven, When earthly things made even Good duke, receive thy daughter, Yea, brought her hither, That thou might'st join her hand with his, Ros. [To DUKE S.] To you I give myself, for I am yours. [To ORLANDO.] To you I give myself, for I am yours. Duke S. If there be truth in sight, you are my daughter. Orl. If there be truth in sight, you are my Rosalind. Phe. If sight and shape be true, Why then, my love adieu! Ros. [To DUKE S.] I'll have no father, if you be not he: [To ORLANDO.] I'll have no husband, if you be not he: [TO PHEBE.] Nor ne'er wed woman, if you be not Hym. she. Peace, ho! I bar confusion. 'Tis I must make conclusion Of these most strange events: Here's eight that must take hands, To join in Hymen's bands, If truth holds true contents. [To ORLANDO, and ROSALIND.] You and you no cross shall part: [TO OLIVER, and CELIA.] You and you are heart in heart: [To PHEBE.] You to his love must accord, Or have a woman to your lord: [To TOUCHSTONE, and AUDREY.] You and you are sure together, As the winter to foul weather. 2 Bro. Let me have audience for a word or two. I am the second son of old sir Rowland, That bring these tidings to this fair assembly.— Duke Frederick, hearing how that every day Men of great worth resorted to this forest, Address'd a mighty power, which were on foot In his own conduct, purposely to take His brother here, and put him to the sword. And to the skirts of this wild wood he came, Where, meeting with an old religious man, After some question with him, was converted Both from his enterprize, and from the world; His crown bequeathing to his banish'd brother, And all their lands restor'd to them again, That were with him exil'd. This to be true, I do engage my life. Duke S. Welcome, young man; Thou offer'st fairly to thy brothers' wedding: To one, his lands withheld; and to the other, A land itself at large, a potent dukedom. First, in this forest, let us do those ends That here were well begun, and well begot; And after, every of this happy number, That have endur'd shrewd days and nights with us, Shall share the good of our returned fortune, According to the measure of their states. Meantime, forget this new-fall'n dignity, And fall into our rustic revelry.— Play, music! and you brides and bridegrooms all, With measure heap'd in joy, to the measures fall. Jaq. Sir, by your patience.-If I heard you rightly, The duke hath put on a religious life, And thrown into neglect the pompous court? 2 Bro. He hath. Jaq. To him will I: out of these convertites There is much matter to be heard and learn'd.You-[To DUKE S.]-to your former honour I bequeath; Your patience, and your virtue, well deserve it :You-To ORLANDO.]-to a love, that your true faith doth merit: You-[To OLIVER.]-to your land, and love, and great allies: You-[To SILVIUS.]-to a long and well deserved bed: And you-[To TOUCHSTONE.]-to wrangling; for thy loving voyage Is but for two months victuall'd.-So, to your pleasures: I am for other than for dancing measures. Jaq. To see no pastime, I:-what you would have, I'll stay to know at your abandon'd cave. [Erit. Duke S. Proceed, proceed: we will begin these rites, As we do trust they'll end in true delights. |