A Parisian millionaire once wrote to the celebrated comic author, Scribe:-"Honored Sir-I wish very much to ally my name with yours in the creation of a dramatic work. Will you be so kind as to write a comedy of which I shall compose one or two lines, so that I may be mentioned in the title; I will bear the entire pecuniary expense, so that I may divide the glory." Scribe, who was vain even to conceit, replied:-"Sir—I regret that I cannot comply with your modest request. It is not in accordance with my ideas of religion or propriety that a horse and an ass should be yoked together." To which the millionaire quickly responded:-"Sir-I have received your impertinent letter. How dare you call me a horse!"

Voltaire was warmly panegyrizing Haller one day, when a person present remarked that his eulogy was very disinterested, for Haller did not speak well of him. "Ah, well," said Voltaire, "perhaps we are both of us mistaken."

An Irishman, abusing Erin, declared that it contained nothing good but the whiskey. Whereupon a wag observed, “You mean to say, then, that with all her faults you love her still."

Bacon relates that a fellow named Hogg importuned Sir Nicholas to save his life on account of the kindred between Hog and Bacon. "Aye," replied the judge, "but you and I cannot be kindred except you be hanged, for Hog is not Bacon until it be well hanged."

Lord Eldon, struck by the appearance of a beautiful woman passing Westminster Hall, expressed his admiration freely. The lady overhearing, returned the compliment by pronouncing him to a friend near by a most excellent judge.

Thackeray, while in Charleston, S. C., was introduced to Mrs. C., one of the leaders of its society. In his pert way he said, "I am happy to meet you, madam; I have heard that you are a fast woman." "Oh, Mr. Thackeray," she replied with a fascinating smile, "we must not believe all we hear; I had heard, sir, that you were a gentleman."

Mr. Spurgeon rebuked certain of his followers who refused to interfere in politics on the ground that they were "not of this world." This, he argued, was mere metaphor. "You might as well," said he, "being sheep of the Lord, decline to eat muttonchop on the plea that it would be cannibalism."

A young barrister, intending to be very eloquent, observed, "such principles as these, my Lord, are written in the Book of Nature." "What page, sir?" said Lord Chief Justice Ellenborough; and the orator was silenced for life.

The Sexes.

As unto the bow the cord is,
So unto the man is woman:

Though she bends him, she obeys him;
Though she draws him, yet she follows;

Useless each without the other.-Hiawatha.

MRS. JAMESON, speaking of the mistaken belief that there are essential masculine and feminine virtues and vices, says it is not the quality itself, but the modification of the quality, which is masculine or feminine; and on the manner or degree in which these are balanced or combined in the individual, depends the perfection of that individual character. As the influences of religion are extended and as civilization advances, those qualities which are now admired as essentially feminine will be considered as essentially human,-such as gentleness, purity, the more unselfish and spiritual sense of duty, and the dominance of the affections over the passions. This is, perhaps, what Buffon, speaking as a naturalist, meant when he said that with the progress of humanity Les races se féminisent. The axiom of the Greek philosopher Antisthenes, the disciple of Socrates, The virtue of the man and the woman is the same,

shows a perception of this moral truth, a sort of anticipation of the Christian doctrine, even in the pagan times.

Every reader of Wordsworth will recollect the poem entitled The Happy Warrior. It has been quoted as an epitome of every manly, soldierly, and elevated quality. Those who make the experiment of merely substituting the word WOMAN for the word WARRIOR, and changing the feminine for the masculine pronoun, will find that it reads equally well, and from beginning to end is literally as applicable to the one sex as to the other. As thus:

CHARACTER OF THE HAPPY WOMAN.
Who is the happy woman? Who is she
That every woman born should wish to be?
It is the generous spirit who, when brought
Among the tasks of real life, hath wrought
Upon the plan that pleased her childish thought;
Whose high endeavors are an inward light,
That makes the path before her always bright;
Who, with a natural instinct to discern
What knowledge can perform, is diligent to learn ;
Abides by this resolve, and stops not there,
But makes her moral being her prime care;
Who, doomed to go in company with pain,
And fear, and sorrow, miserable train!
Turns that necessity to glorious gain;
In face of these doth exercise a power
Which is our human nature's highest dower;
Controls them and subdues, transmutes, bereaves
Of their bad influence, and their good receives;
By objects, which might force the soul to abate
Her feeling, rendered more compassionate;

Is placable, because occasions rise

So often that demand such sacrifice;

More skilful in self-knowledge, even more pure
As tempted more; more able to endure

As more exposed to suffering and distress;

Thence, also, more alive to tenderness.

"Tis she whose law is reason; who depends

Upon that law as on the best of friends;

Whence, in a state where men are tempted still
To evil for a guard against worse ill,

And what in quality or act is best

Doth seldom on a right foundation rest,

Who comprehends her trust, and to the same
Keeps faithful with a singleness of aim;
And therefore does not stoop, nor lie in wait
For wealth, or honors, or for worldly state;
Whom they must follow; on whose head must fall
Like showers of manna, if they come at all;
Whose power shed round her, in the common strife
Or mild concerns of ordinary life,

A constant influence, a peculiar grace;

But who, if she be called upon to face

Some awful moment to which Heaven has joined
Great issues, good or bad for human kind,

Is happy as a lover; and, attired
With sudden brightness, like to one inspired;
And through the heat of conflict keeps the law
In calmness made, and sees what she foresaw;
Or if an unexpected call succeed,

Come when it will, is equal to the need!

Mrs. Jameson adds that in all these fifty-six lines there is only one line which cannot be feminized in its significance,— that filled up with asterisks, and which is totally at variance with the ideal of a happy woman. It is the line

And in himself possess his own desire.

No woman could exist happily or virtuously in such complete independence of all external affections as these words express. "Her desire is to her husband :" this is the sort of subjection prophesied for the daughters of Eve. A woman doomed to exist without this earthly rest for her affections does not "in herself possess her own desire;" she turns towards God; and, if she does not make her life a life of worship, she makes it a life of charity, or she dies a spiritual and a moral death. Is it much better with the man who concentrates his aspirations in himself?

THE PRAISE OF WOMEN.

An Old English Ballad.

Both sexes, give ear to my fancy,
While the praise of a woman I sing
Confined not to Polly nor Nancy,

But alike from the beggar to king.
When Adam at first was created,

And lord of the universe crowned,
His happiness was not completed,
Because a help-meet was not found.
He had all things that were wanting,
Which yield us contentment in life;
Both horses and foxes for hunting,
Which many love more than a wife.
A garden, so planted by nature,
Man could not produce in his life;
And yet the all-wise Creator

Saw that he wanted a wife.

Old Adam was cast into slumber,
A rib taken out of his side;
And when he awoke in a wonder,

He beheld his most beautiful bride.
With transport he gazed upon her,-
His happiness now was complete:
He praised the all-bountiful Donor,
Who thus had provided a mate.
She was not taken out of his head,
To rule and triumph over man;
Nor was she taken out of his heel,
To be ruled and trampled upon.
But she was taken out of his side,
His equal companion to be;
And thus they both were united,
And man is the top of the tree.
Then let not the fair be despised

By man, for she's part of himself;

Since woman by Adam was prizéd

More than the whole world full of wealth.

For man without woman's a beggar,

Although the whole world he possessed; And the beggar who has a good wife, With more than this world he is blest.