and deeds. The qualification of this fubmiffion, the only restriction of it, is in the Lord; that is, fo as it be confiftent with her duty to God. That limitation obferved, it extends to every thing, Eph. v. 24. (3) The reasonablenefs of this, it fhould not be complained of; it is fit, juft, and equitable in refpect of God's ordinance enjoining it, the infirmity of the woman as the weaker fex, and the inconveniencies arifing on the refufal of it. 2. The fum of the hufband's duty is love to her. This comprehends in it the whole of his duty; for love will always be active, and fpread itself into the fe veral duties he owes her, yea and will feafon all these duties, and tincture them with kindness to her. The apoftle comprehends all in this, both to fweeten the. wife's fubjection on the one hand, and to temper his authority on the other. And therefore he cautions against bitterness, and that both in heart, that he hate her not, nor coldly love her, in words, and in deeds, Hnfbands and wives may not carry to one another as they lift, but must be dutiful to one another according to the word of God, as they will be accountable to God. Here I fhall fhew, 1. The duties common to both hufband and wife. 2. 1 hofe more peculiar to each party. First, I fhall fhew the duties common to both hufband and wife. 1. Conjugal love, Tit. ii. 4. They must love one another with a fpecial love, not communicable to another. God's ordinance has made them one flesh, and God's law cbliges them to be one heart. They muft love one another more than father or mother, yea as their own flesh, Eph. v. 31. 28. And where that love is wanting, God is difhonoured, and the fociety is uncomfortable. And however fcarce they may be of lovely qualities, we muft love them becaufe they are ours. 2. Cohabitation, dwelling together; which comprehends the ordinary ufe of the fame houfe, bed, and board, 1 Pet. iii. 7. 1 Cor. vii. 10. This is fuch a neceffary duty, that an obftinate refufal in either party to dwell together diffolves the marriage, 1 Cor. vii. 15. that is wilful defertion. And if a man remove to another place for a long time, and upon no bafe cause, his wife is obliged to go with him, if he defire, unless there be fome imminent danger either of her body or foul; and he is obliged to take her if the defire. For though it belongs to the husband as the head to determine the place of their habitation, yet he cannot hake off his duty to his wife, 1 Cor. vii. 5. Gen. xii. II. 3. Living together in peace, i Cor. vii. 15. We muft follow peace with all men; but there are double ties on married perfons to follow peace with one another, and to watch that it be not broken. No war is fo unnatural as that which is betwixt them; and none fo hopeless if they make it not up betwixt themfelves. Did we fee a man tearing his own flesh, or a woman beating her head against the wall, we would conclude they were mad. Yet thus it is in effect where there is no peace betwixt husband and wife. The ancient Pagan Greeks, when they cut up the wedding-facrifice, took the gall, and with eager loathing flung it behind the altar, to fhew that in wedlock all bitterness must be put far away. There is none fo hopelefs, if they take it not up between themselves? for there is none to judge betwixt them but God: therefore if they cannot clear, they fhould bury their controverfies, yielding for peace fake. And though certainly it is moft natural that the woman fhould firft yield, yet he is a foolish man that will not facrifice of his own right to peace, and yield though to the weaker veffel, as Mofes did to Zipporah, Exod. iv. 25. 26. Certainly whofo firft yields, fhews most refpect to God, and ftands faireft for the blefling, Matth. v. 9. Blessed are the peace-makers. 4. Carefulness to pleafe one another. The wife' ought to fuit herself to the will of her hufband, fo VOL. I. 4 F far as lawfully fhe may, 1 Cor. vii. 34. watching a gainst what is difpleafing, and doing in things lawful what she knows is pleafing, Gen. xxvii. 9. Yea and the husband muft be careful to pleafe her too, ver. 33. It is a piece of that conjugal tenderness he owes her, not to do any thing that he knows may justly difplease her, and even to humour her in things lawful and fit, for her greater comfort; for though he is the head, yet she is his own flesh. This would keep peace. 5. Living together not only in peace, but in love, delighting in one another's company, Eccl. ix. 9. living chearfully and familiarly together. A careless, inorofe, and unconverfible humour is oppofite to the end of the state of marriage, which is the mutual comfort of the parties. 6. Honouring one another. The woman ought to honour her husband, walking under a confcientious respect to that fuperiority God has granted him over her, 1 Cor. xi. 7. So that the may not trample upon his character as a husband. Yea and fhe muft labour to walk fo with others, as fhe may bring no difhonour to him by her indifcreet carriage, but be a glory to him by her meek and quiet converfation, 1 Pet. iii. 4. So as he is her head, fhe becomes a crown to that head. A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband, Prov. xii. 4. The husband must also honour his wife, 1 Pet. iii. 7. both in his words and actions, fhewing his esteem of her virtues, praifing her when fhe does well, Prov. xxxi. 28. repofing truft and confidence in her as to the management of his affairs, and not keeping up the knowledge of his bufinefs from her, but communicating counfels with her, Prov. xxxi. 11. This he muft do when the is worthy; otherwise that must take place, Micah vii. 5. Keep the doors of thy mouth from her that lieth in thy bofom. In a word, he ought to carry fo respectfully to her, as to thew that he looks on her as his companion, and may gain respect to her from the rest of the family, Gen. xvi. 6. and this be caufe fhe is the weaker veffel, both naturally and morally, in which refpect fhe is more eafily crushed and broken in her spirit, especially by the auftere and undutiful carriage of her husband. 7. Sympathizing with one another in all their croffes, and griefs, and joys, whether of body or mind. Being one flesh, they muft fhew it this way. It is a common duty we owe to all, to weep with them that weep, and rejoice with them that rejoice; and fo both their griefs and joys fhould be mutual, in a fpecial manner; otherwife they will be as jarring ftrings in an inftrument that mars the harmony, 1 Sam. i. 8. And they must bear with one another's infirmities, covering them with the mantle of love, Gal. vi. 2. 8. Faithfulness in respect of their bodies, communicating themselves one to another according to the ends of marriage, with modefty and foberness, marriage putting the body of each in the other's power; and therefore the apostle in this cafe forbids them to defraud one another, 1 Cor. vii. 5. Another piece of that faithfulness is keeping by one another, and not embracing a stranger, which is that horrible breach that diffolves the bond of marriage.. 9. Lastly, A due concern for one another's foul and eternal welfare, 1 Pet. iii. 7. They must be helpful to one another in the way of the Lord, doing what they can to advance one another's eternal intereft; watching over one another, joining together in holy duties; inftructing and admonishing one another lovingly and meekly, each one propofing to themselves the falvation of their relative, as well as their own, í Cor. vii. 16. This is a weighty point, which few lay to heart, &c. [To be continued in the third volume.] THE END OF THE SECOND VOLUME. The Tranfcriber and Preparer of this work for the prefs hereby gives notice, that, at the defire of feveral minifters and Chriftians in different places of the country, he will speedily iffue PROPOSAL S In FIVE VOLUMES DUODECIMO, The late Reverend and Learned Author of this and many other excellent Pieces. The propofals will fpecify the titles and texts of the discourses to be contained in each volume, The price of each volume will be only 2 s. fewed in a blue paper cover, or 2s. 6d. bound, to be paid on delivery. A volume will be published every other month. As no more fermons of this author are defigned for publication, it is hoped that the encouragers of his former works will fhew a difpofition to promote this laft publication of the author. If a fufficient number of fubfcribers do not offer in five months from this date, the defign will be entirely laid afide, however much it may be to the lofs of the public, and contrary to the inclination of feveral who have fignified the frongest defire to see the last remains of this great and good man. And the tranfcriber hereby gives further notice, that if this defigned publication fhall meet with fuccefs, the author's Memoirs will fpeedily follow; but if it fhall fail of fuitable encouragement, the publication of the Memoirs will also be laid afide. It is almost unneceffary to fay, that these fermons, and the me moirs, are intended to be published by the confent and under the infpection of the Rev. Mr MICHAEL BOSTON, the author's grandson, who furnishes the manufcripts to the tranfcriber, and compares the tranfcript with the original before printing; and that the tranfcriber is the fame perfon, who has prepared all Mr Bofton's pofthumous tracts and fermons that have been hitherto published, except the fer mons on afflictions and church-communion, first published in 1737., |