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unjustly taken away, being like a burnt child dreading fire.

My father being fully refolved to put me to the college on his own charges, I began, on the 15th of October, to expound the Greek New Teftament; which, I think, I completed betwixt that and Dec. 1.; at which time he took me to Edinburgh, where being tried in the Greek New Teftament by Mr Herbert Kennedy regent, I was entered into his femi clafs, my father having given him four dollars, as was done yearly thereafter, paying alfo all other dues.

Thus the Lord, in my fetting out in the world, dealt with me, obliging me to have recourfe to himfelf for this thing, to do it for me. He brought it through many difficulties, tried me with various difappointments, at length carried it to the utmost point of hopeleffnefs, feemed to be laying the grave-ftone upon it at the time of my mother's death; and yet after all he brought it to pafs; and that has been the ufual method of Providence with me all along in matters of the greatest weight. The wifdom appearing, in leading the blind by a way they knew not, thined in the putting off that matter to this time, notwithftanding all endeavours to compafs it fooner; for I am perfectly convinced I was abundantly foon put to the college, being then but in the fifteenth year of my age; and the manner of it was kindly ordered, in that I was thereby beholden to none for that my education; and it made way for fome things which Providence faw needful for me. During the whole time I was at the college, I dieted myfelf, being lodged in a private house, to which I was led by kind Providence, as fit for my circumftances.

1692. The first year, being fomewhat childish, but knowing with what difficulty I had reached what I had obtained, I lived fparingly, and perhaps more fo than was needful or reasonable. Being dejected and melancholy, I went but little out of my chamber, fave to the class and thus my improvement was confined in a manner to my leffons

1693. The fecond year I attended the college, I had an entire comradefhip with Andrew (afterwards Mr Andrew) Elliot, a minifter's fon, and now minifter of Auchtertool in Fife, which feveral ways contributed to my advantage, and lafted during the rest of the time we were at the college, Mean while I ftill lived fparingly.

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In the spring that year began a breach of my health, whereby I became liable to fwoonings, which continued for feveral years after. It was, I think, in the month of April, when being on my knees at fecret prayer, my heart began to fail, and I rofe up, and fell on my back on the floor, and lay a while in a fwoon. Recovering, I called the landlady: then I went to bed, but fainted a fecond time, in which fhe took care of me. Afterwards fhe unwarily fuggested to me, that it might be the fallingficknefs, which occafioned me feveral thoughts of heart. Wherefore, as I came home in the middle of May, I confulted it; and was delivered of thefe fears, which were groundless; but being at home, I was, on the 2d of June, overtaken with another fainting-fit, in which beckoning with my hand I fainted away; and while they were lifting me into the bed, I heard my fifter fay, that I was gone. In a little I recovered, and my father went to prayer at my bed-fide.

The firft or fecond winter I was at the college, being in company with a dumb man, I was urged by fome to afk him a question about my brother William. He anfwered me in writing, as it is Deut. xxix. ult. "Secret

things belong unto the Lord our God," &c.; and, moreover, that there is no fuch thing communicated to the dumb, but that through importunity he himself had fometimes fpoke what he knew not. Thus was I reproved. And I defire that all who may read this or fuch like my failings, may beware of splitting on the fame rocks, fo heavy to me.

About December 20. I gladly went to Edinburgh again for the last year, thinking that courfe of difficulties near an end. I was therefore more chearful, and in point of diet managed more liberally.

1694. About the latter end of February, I came home with John Cockburn, a comrade, fon to John Cockburn in Preston. I could not get him out of the town till a good part of the day was fpent; and when we were come out, he expended a little money he had left, without asking queftions till it was done. Then finding there was no money with us but what I had, which could fcarcely procure us both a night's lodging, we refolved to hold on our way, though our journey was in all twenty-eight miles long. Night drawing on, we were twelve miles from home, and got nothing in the inn but bread and water;

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there being no ale in it, it seems. Then under night we went on our way, in the moon-light: but on the hills we began to fail, travelling a-foot, and having had but forry refreshment at the inn. Mean while, as we lay on the highway to reft our weary limbs a little, a farmer came up to us, who offered to lodge us with him near by; which was gladly embraced.

That youth and I had been school-fellows at Dunfe, and fo much refembled one another in face and ftature, as if we had been twins; the which being noticed by our fellows, made a moft entire friendship between us at school. It lafted for a while; but was at length, upon fome childish controverfy, quite blown up, and was never recovered. For at the college, being more liberally furnished, he overlooked me, and gave himself to diverfions; so that there was no communication, but what was general, betwixt him and me, as I remember, till the last of the three years. At what time, being once in company with him, I was like to have a plea to rid betwixt him and another; and, to the best of my knowledge, left them at length. And then again I came home with him as aforefaid. He and I both were defigned for the ftudy of divinity; but in a little time he gave up with it, went to London, applied himfelf to book-keeping, and went abroad, I fuppofe, and died. Wherefore, when I was honoured of God to preach the gofpel of Chrift, I was often a moving fight to his forrowful father. Whence I muft needs conclude, that "it is good for a man to bear the yoke in his youth;" and furely it was good and neceffary for me.

Being allowed only L. 16 Scots by my father for the laureation, I borrowed 20 merks from one of my brothers, and fo went to Edinburgh for that end in the fummer. But the day fignified to me not being kept, I returned without my errand. This disappointment, with other difcouragements I had met with in profecuting my ftudies, furnished my evil heart, when going in a fecond time that feafon to the laureation, the occafion of that unbelieving thought, that I would never believe I could obtain it till I faw it. For this thought I prefently fmarted, meeting fuddenly on the back of it with a difpenfation which threatened to lay the grave-ftone upon all that I had hitherto attained; for fome officers took me up by the way to be a foldier: but the Lord delivered me quick

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Thus

Thus holy wife Providence ordered my education at the college; the charges whereof amounted in all but to L. 128 158 Scots; of the which I had 20 merks as aforefaid to pay afterwards. Out of that fum were paid the regents fees yearly, and the college-dues, and alfo my maintenance was furnished out of it. By means thereof, I had a competent understanding of the logics, metaphyfics, ethics, and general phyfics; always taking pains of what was before me, and pleafing the regent: but I learned nothing elfe, fave fhort-hand writing, which an acquaintance of mine taught me, namely, a well-inclined baker-lad. My defign in acquiring it was to write fermons; but I made little ufe of it that way, finding it to mar the frame of my fpirit in hearing, which obliged me to quit that ufe of it. But kind was the defign of Providence in it notwithstanding; for befides its ferving me in recording things I defigned to keep fecret, and otherwife, it has been exceeding ufeful to me of late years, in making the first draughts of my writings therein. "Known unte

"God are all his works from the beginning."

PERIOD III.

From my laureation, to my being licensed to preach the gospel.

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"Hat fummer the burfary of the prefbytery of Dunfe was conferred on me, as a ftudent of theology; as was that of the prefbytery of Churnfide on my comrade John Cockburn. And after the laureation, fome time before the harveft, I entered on the ftudy of theology; Mr James Ramfay, minifter then at Eymouth, now at Kelfo, having put the book in my hand, viz. Pareus on Urfin's catechifm; the which I read over three or four times ere I went to the fchool of divinity. Among the first books of that kind which I had a particular fondnefs for, was Weems's Chriftian fynagogue.

I went, on invitation, to F-s, and fpent fome weeks there, after the harveft, with his two fons, and James (after Mr James) Ridpath, ftudents in philofophy, to whom I was there helpful in their ftudies. And that I may reckon the only time of my life in which I had a taste of the youthful diverfions; whereof I foon faw the vanity, and wherein I drove but heavily, the family being altoge

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ther carnal. But while I was there, I kept up the worship of God in the family: nevertheless I found that manner of life enfnaring.

1695. About January 20. 1695, I went to Edinburgh to the fchool of divinity, then taught by the great Mr George Campbell. There was then a great ftorm of fnow on the ground. By the way, being extremely cold, I alighted off my horfe, (I think it was betwixt Ridpath-edge and Redftone-ridge), and walked. Having walked a while, a fwoon began to feize me, and I could walk no more. I took horfe, but was fcarcely able to fit on it. My brother, who by good Providence was with me, put a bit of bread in my mouth; and I had fcarcely as much ftrength left as to lift my jaws and chew it. It would have been defireable to me to have been near the meanest cottage. And I recovered. At that time I took a chamber, and dieted myself again, about the fpace of a month: but weary of that way, Mr Ridpath aforefaid and I tabled ourfelves, as moft convenient. He being a fiart youth, and difpofed to profit in philofophy, I did good to myfelf, by being ferviceable to him in the matter of philofophy, which was his only ftudy at that time. Having fome tafte of mufic before, we went to a fchool one month, and made good proficiency; prefling forward our teacher, and purfuing it in our chamber: fo that by that means we had the tenors, trebles, and baffes, of the common tunes, with fome other tunes, and several prick-fongs. My voice was good, and I had a delight in mufic.

A few of us, newly entered to the fchool of divinity, were taught for a time Riiffenius's compend, in the profeffor's chamber. Publicly in the hall he taught Èffenius's compend. For exercises that feffion, I had a paraphrafe on If. xxxviii. 1.-9. a lecture on Prov. i. and an exegefis de certitudine subjectiva electionis; and in a private fociety, another de jure divino presbyteratus. I was alfo for a while, at that time, I fuppofe, with Mr Alexander Rule profeffor of Hebrew; but remember no remarkable advantage I had thereby.

About the latter end of April, I returned home, clothed with teftimonials from Profeffor Campbell, bearing, that I had diligently attended the profeflion, dexterously acquitted myfin feveral effays prescribed to me, behaved inoffenfively, gravely, and pioufly. He was a man of great learning, but exceflively modeft, undervaluing him

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felf,

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