Kent. Nor tripped neither, you base football player. [Tripping up his heels. Lear. I thank thee, fellow: thou servest me, and I'll love thee. Fool. Why? for taking one's part that is out of favour. Nay, an thou canst not smile as the wind sits, thou 'lt catch cold shortly: there, take Kent. Come, sir, arise, away: I'll teach you my coxcomb. Why, this fellow has banished differences: away, away. If you will measure two of his daughters, and did the third a blessyour lubber's length again, tarry; but away: going against his will: if thou follow him, thou must to. Have you wisdom? so. [Pushing the Steward out. Lear. Now, my friendly knave, I thank thee: there's earnest of thy service. [Giving KENT money. Enter Fool. Fool. Let me hire him too:-here's my coxcomb. [Giving KENT his cap. Lear. How now, my pretty knave; how dost thou? Fool. Sirrah, you were best take my coxcomb. needs wear my coxcomb--How now, nuncle? 'Would I had two coxcombs, and two daughters. Lear. Why, my boy? Fool. If I gave them all my living, I'd keep my coxcombs myself. There's mine: beg another of thy daughters. Lear. Take heed, sirrah: the whip. Fool. Truth's a dog that must to kennel: he must be whipped out, when Lady, the brach, may stand by the fire and stink. Lear. A pestilent gall to me! Lear. No, lad: teach me. Fool. That lord that counselled thee To give away thy land, Or do thou for him stand: Will presently appear; The one in motley here, The other found out there! Lear. Dost thou call me fool, boy? Fool. All thy other titles thou hast given away: that thou wast born with. Kent. This is not altogether fool, my lord. Fool. No, 'faith, lords and great men will not let me; if I had a monopoly out, they would have part on 't and ladies, too, they will not let me have all fool to myself; they'll be snatching. Give me an egg, nuncle, and I'll give thee two crowns. Lear. What two crowns shall they be? Fool. Why, after I have cut the egg i'the middle, and eat up the meat, the two crowns of the egg. When thou clovest thy crown i' the middle, and gavest away both parts, thou borest thine ass on thy back over the dirt thou hadst little wit in thy bald crown, when thou gavest thy golden one away. If I speak like myself in this, let him be whipped that first finds it so. Sings. Fools had ne'er less grace in a year; For wise men are grown foppish; And know not how their wits to wear, Their manners are so apish. Lear. When were you wont to be so full of songs, sirrah? Fool. I have used it, nuncle, ever since thou madest thy daughters thy mother for when thou gavest them the rod, and putt'st down thine own breeches, Sings. Then they for sudden joy did weep, And I for sorrow sung, That such a king should play bo-peep, And go the fools among. Pr'y thee, nuncle, keep a schoolmaster that can teach thy fool to he: I would fain learn to lie. Lear If you lie, sirrah, we'll have you whipped. Fool. I marvel what kin thou and thy daughters are: they'll have me whipped for speaking true, thou 'lt have me whipped for lying; and sometimes I am whipped for holding my peace. I had rather be any kind of thing than a fool: and yet I would not be thee, nuncle; thou hast pared thy wit o' both sides, and left nothing in the middle. Here comes one o' the parings. Enter GONERIL. Lear. How now, daughter, what makes that frontlet on? Methinks you are too much of late i' the frown. Fool. Thou wast a pretty fellow when thou hadst no need to care for her frowning: now thou art an O without a figure. I am better than thou art now: I am a fool; thou art nothing. Yes, forsooth, I will hold my tongue; so your face [To GONERIL] bids me, though you say nothing. Mum, mum: He that keeps nor crust nor crum, That's a shealed peascod. [Pointing to LEAR. Gon. Not only, sir, this your all-licensed fool, But other of your insolent retinue Do hourly carp and quarrel; breaking forth To have found a safe redress; but now grow fearful, By what yourself too late have spoke and done, Fool. For you trow, nuncle, The hedge-sparrow fed the cuckoo so long, That it had its head bit off by its young.— So out went the candle, and we were left darkling. Lear. Are you our daughter? Gon. Come, sir, I would you would make use of that good wisdom whereof I know you are fraught; and put away these dispositions, which of late transform you from what you rightly are. Fool. May not an ass know when the cart draws the horse?—Whoop, Jug! I love thee. Lear. Does any here know me?—Why this is not Lear: does Lear walk thus? speak thus? Where are his eyes? Either his notion weakens, or his discernings are lethargied.-Sleeping or waking?-Ha! sure 't is not so.-Who is it that can tell me who I am?-Lear's shadow? I would learn that; for by the marks of sovereignty, knowledge, and reason, I should be false persuaded I had daughters Fool. Which they will make an obedient father. This admiration is much o' the favour Of other your new pranks. I do beseech you As you are old and reverend, you should be wise: By her that else will take the thing she begs, Lear. Darkness and devils! Gon. You strike my people; and your disordered rabble Make servants of their betters. How ugly didst thou in Cordelia shew! nature From the fixed place; drew from my heart all love, And added to the gall. O Lear, Lear, Lear! Beat at this gate, that let thy folly in, [Striking his head. And thy dear judgment out!-Go, go, my people. Alb. My lord, I am guiltless, as I am ignorant Of what hath moved you. Lear. It may be so, my lord.— Hear, nature, hear; dear goddess, hear!— Suspend thy purpose, if thou didst intend To make this creature fruitful! Into her womb convey sterility! Dry up in her the organs of increase; And from her derogate body never spring A babe to honour her! If she must teem, Create her child of spleen; that it may live, And be a thwart disnatured torment to her! Let it stamp wrinkles in her brow of youth; With cadent tears fret channels in her cheeks; Turn all her mother's pains and benefits To laughter and contempt: that she may feel How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is To have a thankless child !—Away, away! [Exit. Alb. Now, gods that we adore, whereof comes this? Gon. Never afflict yourself to know the cause; But let his disposition have that scope That dotage gives it. Re-enter LEAR. Lear. What, fifty of my followers at a clap! Within a fortnight! Alb. What's the matter, sir? Lear. I'll tell thee:-Life and death! I am ashamed That thou hast power to shake my manhood thus: [TO GONERIL. That these hot tears, which break from me per force, Should make thee worth them.-Blasts and fogs upon thee! The untented woundings of a father's curse 'Tis politic and safe to let him keep At point a hundred knights! Yes, that on every dream, Each buz, each fancy, each complaint, dislike, Let me still take away the harms I fear, Not fear still to be taken. I know his heart: Lear. I will forget my nature.-So kind a father!-Be my horses ready? Fool. Thy asses are gone about 'em.-The reason why the seven stars are no more than seven, is a pretty reason. Lear. Because they are not eight? Fool. Yes, indeed :-thou wouldst make a good fool. Lear. To take it again perforce !—Monster ingratitude! Fool. If thou wert my fool, nuncle, I'd have thee beaten for being old before thy time. Lear. How's that? Fool. Thou shouldst not have been old before thou hadst been wise. Lear. O let me not be mad, not mad, sweet SCENE I-4 Court within the Castle of the EARL OF GLOSTER. Enter EDMUND and CURAN, meeting. Edm. Save thee, Curan. fa Cur. And you, sir. I have been with your ther; and given him notice that the Duke of Cornwall, and Regan his duchess, will be here with him to-night. Edm. How comes that? Cur. Nay,'I know not.-You have heard of the news abroad? I mean the whispered ones, for they are yet but ear-kissing arguments. Edm. Not I: 'pray you, what are they? Cur. Have you heard of no likely wars toward, 'twixt the Dukes of Cornwall and Albany? Edm. Not a word. Cur. You may, then, in time. Fare you well, sir. [Exit. Edm. The duke be here to-night! The better; best: This weaves itself perforce into my business. Enter EDGAR. My father watches.-O sir, fly this place : He's coming hither; now, i' the night, i' the haste, Edg. I am sure on 't, not a word, Edm. I hear my father coming:-Pardon me: In cunning I must draw my sword upon you: Draw: seem to defend yourself: now quit you well. Yield; come before my father: light, ho, here!Fly, brother.-Torches! torches!-So, farewell.[Exit EDGAR. Some blood drawn on me would beget opinion [Wounds his arm. Of my more fierce endeavour: I have seen drunkards Do more than this in sport.-Father! father! Enter GLOSTER and Servants, with torches. sword out, Mumbling of wicked charms, conjuring the moon To stand his auspicious mistress : Glo. But where is he? Edm. Look, sir, I bleed. Glo. Where is the villain, Edmund? Edm. Fled this way, sir. When by no means he could, Glo. Pursue him, ho! Go after.-[Exit Servant. By no means, what? Edm. Persuade me to the murder of your lordship; But that I told him, the revenging gods |