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SCENE 1.-The same.
Enter a MERCHANT, ANGELO, and an OFFICER,
Mer. You know, since pentecost the sum is due,
And since I have not much importuned you;
Nor now I had not, but that I am bound
To Persia, and want gilders for my voyage :
Therefore make present satisfaction,
Or I'll attach you by this officer.
Ang. Even just the sum, that I do owe to you,
Is growing* to me by Antipholus;
And, in the instant that I met with you,
He had of me a chain; at five o'clock,
I shall receive the money for the same:
Pleaseth you walk with me down to his house,
I will discharge my bond, and thank you too.
Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Ephesus, and DROMIO of Ephens.
Offi. That labour may you save; see where he comes.
Ant. E. While I go to the goldsmith's house, go thou
And buy a rope's end; that will I bestow
Among my wife and her confederates,
For locking me out of my doors by day,
But soft, I see the goldsmith :-get thee gone;
Buy thou a rope, and bring it home to me.
Dro. E. I buy a thousand pound a year! I buy a rope !
Ant. E. A man is well holp up, that trusts to you:
I promised your presence, and the chain;
But neither chain nor goldsmith came to me:
Belike, you thought our love would last too long,
If it were chain'd together; and therefore came not.
Ang. Saving your merry bumour, here's the note,
How much your chain weighs to the utmost carrat;
The fineness of the gold, and chargeful fashion;
Which doth amount to three odd ducats more
Than I stand debted to this gentleman;
I pray you, see him presently discharged,
For he is bound to sea, and stays but for it.
Ant. E. I am not furnished with the present money:
Besides, I have some business in the town:
Good signior, take the stranger to my house,
And with you take the chain, and bid my wife
Disburse the sum on the receipt thereof;
Perchance, I will be there as soon as you.
Ang. Then you will bring the chain to her yourself?
Ant. E. No; bear it with you, lest I come not time enough.
Ang. Well, Sir, I will : Have you the chain about you ?'
Ant. E. An if I have not, Sir, I hope you have;
Or else you may return without
Ang. Nay, come, I pray you, Sir, give me the chain;
Both wind and tide stays for this gentleman,
And I, to blame, have held him here too long.
Ant. E. Good lord, you use this dalliance, to excuse
Your breach of promise to the Porpentine:
I should have chid you for not bringing it,
But, like a shrew, you first begin to brawl.
Mer. The hour steals on; I pray you, Sir, despatch.
Ang. You hear, how he importunes me; the chain-
Ant. E. Why, give it to my wife, and fetch your money.
Ang. Come, come, you know, I gave it you even now;
Either send the chain, or send me by some token.
Ant. E. Fie! now you run this humour out of breath :
Come, where's the chain ? I pray you let me see it.
Mer. My business cannot brook this dalliance;
Good Sir, say, whe'r you'll answer me, or no;
If not, I'll leave him to the officer.
Ant. E. I answer you! What should I answer you?
Ang. The money, that you owe me for the chain.
Ant. E. I owe you none, till I receive the chain.
Ang. You know I gave it you half an hour since.
Ant. E. You gave me none; you wrong me much to say so.
Ang. You wrong me more, Sir, in denying it;
Consider, how it stands upon my credit.
Mer. Well, officer, arrest him at my suit.
Offi. I do; and charge you, in the duke's name, to obey me.
Ang. This touches me in reputation:-
Either consent to pay this
sum for me, Or I attach you by this officer.
Ant. E. Consent to pay thee that I never had ! Arrest me, foolish fellow, if thou dar'st.
Ang. Here is thy fee, arrest him, officer; I would not spare my brother in this case, If he should scorn me so apparently.
Offi. I do arrest you, Sir; you hear the suit.
Ant. E. I do obey thee, till I give thee bail :-
But, sirrah, you shall buy this sport as dear
As all the metal in your shop will answer.
Ang. Sir, Sir, I shall have law in Ephesus,
To your notorious shame, I doubt it not.
Enter DROMIO of Syracuse.
Dro. S. Master, there is a bark of Epidamnum,
That stays but till her owner comes aboard,
And then, Sir, bears away: our fraughtage, * Sir,
I have convey'd aboard; and I have bought
The oil, the balsamum, and aqua-vitæ.
The ship is in her trim; the merry wind
Blows fair from land: they stay for nought at all,
But for their owner, master, and yourself.
Ant. E. How now! a madnian! Why thou peevish* sheep, What ship of Epidamnum stays for me?
Dro. S. A ship you sent me to, to hire waftage.
Ant. E. Thou drunken slave, I sent tbee for a rope; And told thee to what purpose and what end.
Dro. S. You sent me, Sir, for a rope's end as soon:
You sent me to the bay, Sir, for a bark.
Ant. E. I will debate this matter at more leisure,
And teach your ears to listen with more heed.
To Adriana, villain, hie thee straight :
Give her this key, and tell her, in the desk
That's covered o'er with Turkish tapestry,
There is a purse of ducats : let her send it;
Tell her, I am arrested in the street,
And that shall bail me: hie thee, slave; begone.
On, officer, to prison till it come.
[Exeunt MERCHANT, ANGELO, OFFICER, and ANT. E.
Dro. S. "To Adriana! that is where he dined,
Where Dowsabel did claim me for her husband :
She is too big, I hope, for me to compass,
Thither I must, although against my will,
For servants must their masters' minds fulfil.
[Exit. SCENE II.-The same.
Enter ADRIANA and LUCIANA.
Adr. Ah, Luciana, did he tempt thee so?
Mightst thou perceive austerely in his eye
That he did plead in earnest, yea or no ?
Look'd he or red, or pale; or sad, or merrily ?
What observation mad'st thou in this case,
Of his heart's meteors tilting in his face ?
Luc. First, he denied you had in him no right.
Adr. He meant he did me none; the more my spite.
Luc. Then swore he that he was a stranger here.
Adr. And true he swore, though yet forsworn he were.
Luc. Then pleaded I for you.
Adr. And what said he?
Luc. That love I begg'd for you, he beggʻd of me.
Adr. With what persuasion did he tempt thy love ?
Luc. With words, that in an honest suit might move.
First he did praise my beauty; then, my speech.
Adr. Didst speak him fair ?
Luc. Have patience, I beseech.
Adr. I cannot, nor I will not, hold me still;
My tongue, though not my heart, shall have his will.
He is deform’d, crooked, old, and serent
Ill-faced, worse-bodied, shapeless everywhere;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind;
Stigmatical in making, * worse in mind.
Luc. Who would be jealous, then, of such a one ?
No evil lost is waild when it is gone.
Adr. Ah! but I think him better than I say,
And yet would herein others' eyes were worse : Far from her nest the lapwing cries away;
My heart prays for him, though my tongue do curse.
Enter DROMIO of Syracuse.
Dro. S. Here, go; the desk, the purse; sweet now, make haste.
Luc. How hast thou lost thy breath?
Dro. S. By running fast.
Adr. Where is thy master, Dromio ? is he well ?
Dro. S. No, he's in Tartar limbo, worse than hell :
A devil in an everlasting garmentt hath him,
One, whose hard heart is button'd up with steel;
A fiend, a fairy, pitiless and rough;
A wolf, nay, worse, a fellow all in buff;
A back-friend, a shoulder-clapper, one that countermands
The passages of alleys, creeks, and narrow lands;
A hound that runs counter, and yet draws dry-foot well;
One that, before the judgment, carries poor souls to hell. I
Adr. Why, man, what is the matter ?
Dro. s. I do not know the matter? he is ’rested on the case.
Adr. What, is he arrested ? tell me, at whose suit.
Dro. S. I know not at whose suit he is arrested, well;
But he's in a suit of buff which ’rested him, that can I tell :
Will you send him, mistress, redemption, the money in the desk ?
Adr. Go fetch it, sister.-This I wonder at, [Exit LUCIANA. That he, unknown to me, should be in debt: Tell me, was he arrested on a band ?
Dro. S. Not on a band, but on a stronger thing; A chain, a chain; do you not hear it ring ?
Adr. What, the chain ?
Dro. S. No, no, the bell: 'tis time that I were gone.
It was two ere I left him, and now the clock strikes one.
Adr. The hours come back! that did I never hear.
Dro. $. O yes, If any hour meet a sergeant, a’turns back for
Adr. As if time were in debt! how fondly dost thou reason ?
Dro. S. Time is a very bankrupt, and owes more than he's
worth to season.
Nay, he's a thief, too: Have you not heard men say,
That time comes stealing on by night and day?
If he be in debt, and theft, and a sergeant in the way,
Hath he not reason to turn back an hour in a day ?
Adr. Go, Dromio; there's the money, bear it straight;
And bring thy master home immediately. -
Come, sister; I am press'd down with conceit ;*
Conceit, my comfort and my injury.
[Exeunt. SCENE III.-The same.
Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Syracuse.
Ant. S. There's not a man I meet but doth salute me
As if I were their well-acquainted friend;
And every one doth call me by my name.
Some tender money to me, some invite me;
Some other give me thanks for kindnesses ;
Some offer me commodities to buy:
Even now a tailor call’d me in his shop,
And show'd me silks that he had bought for me,
And, therewithal took measure of my body,
Sure, these are but imaginary.wiles,
And Lapland sorcerers inhabit here.
Enter DROMIO of Syracuse. Dro. S. Master, here's the gold you sent me for: What, have you got the picture of old Adam new apparelled ?
Ant. S. What gold is this? what Adam dost thou mean?
Dro. S. Not that Adam that kept the paradise, but that Adam that keeps the prison: he that goes in the calf's skin that was killed for the prodigal; he that came behind you, Sir, like an evil angel, and bid you forsake your liberty.
Ant. S. I understand thee not.
Dro. S. No? why, 'tis a plain case: he that went like a bassviol, in a case of leather; the man, Sir, that, when gentlemen are tired, gives them a fob, and 'rests them; he, Sir, that takes pity on decayed men, and gives them suits of durance; he that sets up his restt to do more exploits with his mace, than a morrispike. I Ant. s. What! thou mean'st an officer?
Dro. S. Ay, Sir, the sergeant of the band; he, that brings any man to answer it, that breaks his band: one that thinks a man always going to bed, and says, God give you good rest.
Ant. S. Well, Sir, there rest in your foolery. Is there any ship puts forth to-night? may we be gone ?
Dro. $. Why, Sir, I brought you word, an hour since, that the bark Expedition put forth to-night; and then were you hindered by the sergeant, to tarry for the hoy, Delay: Here are the angels that you sent for, to deliver you.
Ant. s. The fellow is distract, and so am I;
And here we wander in illusions :
Some blessed power deliver us from hence !
Fanciful conception. + Is confident.