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Dro. E. They stand at the door, master, bid them welcome
hither. Ant. E. There is something in the wind, that we cannot get in. Dro. E. You would say so, master, if your garments were
thin. Your cake here is warm within ; you stand here in the cold : It would make a man mad as a buck, to be so bought and sold.
Ant. E. Go, fetch me something, I'll break ope the gate.
pate. Dro. E. A man may break a word with you, Sir; and words
are but wind; Ay, and break it in your face, so he break it not behind. Dro. S. It seems, thou wantest breaking; Out upon thee,
hind! Dro. E. Here's too much, out upon thee! I pray thee, let me
Ant. E. Go, get thee gone, fetch me an iron crow.
Ant. E. You have prevaild; I will depart in quiet,
* (Is done.)
t 1. e. (fast).
My wife (but, I protest, without desert)
Ang. I'll meet you at that place, some hour hence.
SCENE II.-The same.
Enter LUCIANA, and ANTIPHOLUS of Syracuse. Luc. And may it be that you have quite forgot
A husband's office ? shall, Antipholus, hate, Even in the spring of love, thy love-springs I rot:
Shall love, in building, grow so ruinate? If you did wed my sister for her wealth,
Then, for her wealth's sake, use her with more kindness : Or, if you like elsewhere, do it by stealth;
Muffle your false love with some show of blindness : Let not my sister read it in your eye;
Be not thy tongue thy own shame's orator;
Apparel vice like virtue's harbinger:
Teach sin the carriage of a holy saint;
What simple thief brags of his own attaint? 'Tis double wrong, to truant with your bed,
And let her read it in thy looks at board : Shame hath a bastard fame, well managed ;
Ill deeds are doubled with an evil word. Alas, poor women! make us but believe,
Being compact of credit,that you love us; Though others have the arm, show us the sleeve;
We in your motion turn, and you may move us. Then, gentle brother, get you in again;
Comfort my sister, cheer her, call her wife :
Nor by what wonder you do hit on mine),
Than our earth's wonder; more than earth divine.
* By this time. + An old form of porcupine. # Shoots. $ 1.e. being made altogether of credulity.
| Light of tongue. † Request of Heaven,
Teach me, dear creature, how to think and speak;
Lay open to my earthy gross conceit, Smotherd in errors, feeble, shallow, weak,
The folded meaning of your words deceit. Against my soul's pure truth why labour you,
To make it wander in an unknown field ? Are you a god? would you create me new ?
Transform me then, and to your power I'll yield. But if that I am I, then well I know,
Your weeping sister is no wife of mine,
Far more, far more, to you do I decline,
To drown me in thy sister's flood of tears;
, and I will dote : Spread o'er the silver waves thy golden hairs, And as a bed I'll take thee, and there lie;
And, in that glorious supposition, think
Let love, being light, be drowned if she sink !
Ant. S. No;
Luc. All this my sister is, or else should be.
no wife: Give me thy hand.
Luc. O soft, Sir, hold you still;
[Exit Luc. Enter from the house of ANTIPHOLUS of Ephesus, DROMIO of
Dro. S. Do you know me, Sir ? am I Dromio? am I your
grime of it.
Dro. S. Marry, Sir, besides myself, I am due to a woman; one that claims me, one that haunts me, one that will have me.
Ant. S. What claim lays she to thee?
Dro. S. Marry, Sir, such claim as you would lay to your horse; and she would have me as a beast; not that, I being a beast, she would have me; but that she, being a very beastly creature, lays claim to me.
Ant, S. What is she ?
Dro. $. A very reverent body; ay, such a one as a man may not speak of, without he say, sir-reverence: I have but lean luck in the match, and yet is she a wondrous fat marriage.
Ant. S. How dost thou mean, a fat marriage ?
Dro. S. Marry, Sir, she's the kitchen-wench, and all grease: and I know not what use to put her to, but to make a lamp of her, and run from her by her own light. I warrant, her rags, and the tallow in them, will burn a Poland winter: if she lives till doomsday, she'll burn a week longer than the whole world.
Ant. S. What complexion is she of?
Ant. S. That's a fault that water will mend.
Dro. S. Nell, Sir;-but her name and three-quarters, that is, an ell and three-quarters, will not measure her from hip to hip..
Ant. s. Then she bears some breadth?
Dro. S. No longer from head to foot, than from hip to hip: she is spherical, like a globe; I could find out countries in her.
Ant. S. In what part of her body stands Ireland ?
Dro. S. Marry, Sir, in her buttocks; I found it out by the bogs.
Ant. S. Where Scotland ?
Dro. S. I found it by the barrenness: hard, in the palm of the hand.
Ant. S. Where France ?
Dro. S. In her forehead; arm'd and reverted, making war against her
hair. Ant. S. Where England ?
Dro. S. I look'd for the chalky cliffs, but I could find no whiteness in them: but I guess, it stood in her chin, by the salt rheum that ran between France and it.
Ant. S. Where Spain ?
Dro. S. O, Sir, upon her nose, all o'er embellished with rubies, carbuncles, sapphires, declining their rich aspect to the hot breath of Spain; who sent whole armadas of carracks* to be ballast to her nose.
Ant. S. Where stood Belgia, the Netherlands?
* Large ships.
Dro. S. O, Sir, I did not look so low. To conclude, this drudge, or diviner, laid claim to me; called me Promio; swore, I was assured* to her; told me what privy marks I had about me; as the mark on my shoulder, the mole in my neck, the great wart on my left arm, that I, amazed, ran from her as a witch : and, I think, if my breast had not been made of faith, and my heart of steel, she had transformed me to a curtail-dog, and made me turn i' the wheel.+
Ant. $. Go, hie thee presently, post to the road;
Dro. S. As from bear a man would run for life,
Ang. I know it well, Sir: Lo, here is the chain;
Ant. S. What is your will, that I should do with this?
, Sir; I have made it for you.
Ang. Not once, nor twice, but twenty times you have:
Ant. S. I pray you, Sir, receive the money now,
Ang. You are a merry man, Sir ; fare you well. [Exit.
Ant. S. What I should think of this, I cannot tell ;
[Exit. * Affianced.
+ A turn-spit.