To which Pafquin is made to return this answer: I know not how to help it; for 'tis faid But there is another inconveniency; which is, that befides the calling of his wit and judgment into queftion, he has fo many worfe than horfeleeches, continually preying upon his eftate as his wife has neceffitous friends and kindred; but they that thus marry, are commonly fuch young men, as are left to themselves; their Parents, Overfeers, or faithfulleft Friends being either dead, or at a great diftance from them. Others not affecting marriage at all. live (as they fay) upon the Commons, to whom it is worfe than death, to be put into the Several; but spend that they have altogether in irregular courfes of life, as in change of houfes and lodgings, entertainment of new acquaintance, making great feafts in taverns, invitations, meetings of their (common) Miftreffes. Coach-hire, Cloaths in fashion, and the like; befides the hanging on and intrufion of fome neceffitous Parafites, of whom they fhall find as much ufe, as of water in their boots... There are others again of over-good free natures and difpofitions, who are eafily fetched and drawn in by decayed and crafty knaves (I call them no better, for in truth they are not) to enter into bonds, and to pafs their words for their old debts and engagements; and this they are wrought to do in taverns, in their cups and merriment, at ordinaries, and the like places. I would have in the fairest room of one of thefe houfes, the emblem of a gallant young heir, creeping in at the great end of a hunter's horn, with eafe, but cruelly pincht at the coming out of the fmall end, and a fool ftanding not afar off, laughing at him: and thefe D 2 these be those fools who will be so easily bound for others, and pass their words in their drink: 'Tis eafy into hell to fall, But to come back from thence is all. It is easy flipping into trouble but the return and getting out of it, is full of difficulty. Infinite alfo are the cafualties that are incident to the life of man, whereby he may fall into Poverty; as misfortune by fire, lofs at fea, robbery and theft on land, wounds, lameness, fickness, &c. Many run out of great eftates, and have undone themselves by over-fumptuous building, above and beyond their means and eftates. Others have been undone by careless and thriftless fervants, fuch as wafte and confume their mafter's goods, neither faving nor mending what is amifs; but whatsoever they are intrufted withal, they fuffer to be spoiled, and run to ruin. For, Qui modica fpernit, paulatim defluit; he that de fpifeth all things, falls by little and little, faith the Wiseman. Some (yea a great many) have brought themfelves to beggary by play and gaming, as never lying out of ordinaries, and gaming-houses, which is the ready road to ruin: fuch places, like quickfands, fo fuddenly fink and fwallow them, that hardly you fhall ever fee their heads appear. any more. Others (and great ones too) affect unprofitable, yea, and impoffible inventions and practices, as the Philofopher's Stone, the Adamantine Alphabet, the discovery of that new world in the Moon, by those new-devised glaffes, (far excelling, they fay, thofe of Galilæus) fundry kinds of useless wild-fires, water-works, extractions, and the like. If any would be taught the true ufe of money, let him travel into Italy, for the Italian (the Florentine Florentine especially) is able to teach all the world thrift. For, Italy being divided into many principalities and provinces, and all fertile, the inhabitants are many, (and by reason of often differences amongst them, apt to take up arms) the people are fubject to taxes and impofitions; as in Florence, the Duke hath Excife or Cuftom at the Gates, even out of Herbs, that are brought for Salads and Broths into the city. Having thus fhewed the causes of men's wanting Money, take the following Character of fuch a man. The Character of thofe that want Money, drawn to the Life. HE that wanteth money is for the most part of a forrowful countenance and extreamly melancholy, both in company and alone by himfelf; especially if the weather be foul, rainy, or cloudy. Talk to him of what you will, he will hardly give you the hearing; afk him any quef tions, he anfwers you with monofyllables, as Tarleton did one who did out-eat him at an ordinary; Yes, No, That, Thanks, True, &c. That rhetorical paffage of Status tranflavitus, the state tranflative is of great ufe with him: for he is always laying the caufe of this want upon others, and protesting this great Lord, and that Lady, or Kinsman owes him money, but not a Deniere that he can get he swears at, and murmurs against the French, and other ftrangers, that convey fuch fums of money out of the land, tho' in truth it would be all one to him. if it were ftill in the land: befides, our leather-hides, under the colour of calf-fkins, and at that word, he fhews his boots out at the heels, and wanting mending. He walks with his arms 30: ვი THE PLEASANT ART arms folded, his belt without a sword or rapier, (that perhaps being fomewhere in trouble) an hat without a cravet, or handkerchief, hanging over his eyes, only wears a weather-beaten fancy, for fafhion fake: he cannot ftand ftill, but like one of the Tower wild beats, is ftil! walking from one end of his room to another, humming out fome new Northern tune or other; if he meets with five or ten pieces, happily conferred upon him by the beneficence of fome humble friend or other, he is become a new man, and fo overjoyed with his fortune, that not one drop of finall drink will down with him all that day. CHA P. IV. New Directions to all Manner of Perfons that be in Want or Streights, how to fupply themselves with Money enough at all times. IF Fa man hath fallen into Poverty or Diftrefs, either by death of friends, fome accident or other by Sea or Land, Sicknefs or the like, let him not despair; for, Paupertas non eft vitium: and fince the Common-wealth is like unto an human body, confifting of many members, fo useful each to either, as one cannot fubfift without the other: as a Prince his Council, and Statesmen are as the head; the Arms, are Men of arms; the Back the Commonalty; Hands and Feet, are the Country and Mechanic Trades, &c. So God hath ordained, that all men fhould have need one of another, that none might live idley, or want employment: wherefore Idlenefs, as the bane of a Common-wealth, hath a curfe attending upon it, it fhould be cloathed with rags, it should beg its bread, &c. A proper young man begging of a Gentleman Gentleman on the way in Oxfordshire, the Gentleman chid him, and told him, That a man of his youth and limbs, might be afhamed to beg; whereupon the beggar faid, He was troubled with a loathfome difeafe, which he was afhamed to name; the Gentleman giving him two pence, and riding forward fent his man back to know what his difeafe was; the Beggar refufing to tell him, and being threatened to be cudgelled, he told the ferving-man in plain Englifh, that, his difeafe was Idlenefs, for he was fo lazy, he could not work. I remember I have read in an Italian hiftory, of one fo idle, that he was fain to have one to help him to ftir his chops, when he fhould eat his meat. Now if you would afk me, what courfe he fhould take, or what he fhould do that wanteth money, let him firft bethink himself to what profeffion or trade of life he hath been formerly brought up; if of the inferior or middle fort of Tradefmen or Artificers, (for those are chiefly concerned in this unhappiness,) let fuch, First, Be very diligent and induftrious in their refpective trades and callings, and not be flothful in bufinefs. Secondly, Let them take heed of idleness, and of all vain and idle companions, that loiter up and down, and fquander away their time as if it were of no value, when it is the moft precious thing in the world: there being nothing in the world that is a more certain indication of ruin and deftruction, than the wafting and mif-improvement of our time. And yet this is frequently done by thofe that would take it ill to be taxed therewith: as for inftance, how many are there that spend a great deal of their time in coffee-houfes and weekly-clubs; where, tho' but little money is pretended to be spent, yet a great deal of precious time is there fquandered away, |