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A SERMON ON MALT.

The Rev. Dr. Dodd lived within a few miles of Cambridge, (England,) and had offended several students by preaching a sermon on temperance. One day some of them met him. They said one to another,

"Here's Father Dodd: he shall preach us a sermon." Accosting him with,

"Your servants."

"Sirs! yours, gentlemen!" replied the Doctor.

They said, "We have a favor to ask of you, which must be granted." The divine asked what it was.

"To preach a sermon," was the reply.

"Well," said he, "appoint the time and place, and I will." "The time, the present; the place, that hollow tree," (pointing to it,) said the students.

"Tis an imposition!" said the Doctor: "there ought to be consideration before preaching."

"If you refuse," responded they, "we will put you into the tree!" Whereupon the Doctor acquiesced, and asked them for

a text.

"Malt!" said they.

The reverend gentleman commenced :

:

"Let me crave your attention, my beloved!

"I am a little man, come at a short warning, to preach a short sermon, upon a short subject, to a thin congregation, in an unworthy pulpit. Beloved! my text is 'MALT.' I cannot divide it into syllables, it being but a monosyllable: therefore I must divide it into letters, which I find in my text to be four:-M-A-L-T. M, my beloved, is moral-A, is allegorical -L, is literal-T, is theological.

"1st. The moral teaches such as you drunkards good manners; therefore M, my masters-A, all of you—L, leave off— T, tippling.

"2d. The allegorical is, when one thing is spoken and another meant; the thing here spoken is Malt, the thing meant

the oil of malt, which you rustics make M, your masters-A, your apparel-L, your liberty-T, your trusts.

"3d. The theological is according to the effects it works, which are of two kinds—the first in this world, the second in the world to come. The effects it works in this world are, in some, M, murder-in others, A, adultery-in all, L, looseness of life -and particularly in some, T, treason. In the world to come, the effects of it are, M, misery-A, anguish-L, lamentation -T, torment-and thus much for my text, Malt.'

"Infer 1st: As words of exhortation: M, my masters--A, all of you-L, leave off-T, tippling.

"2d. A word for conviction: M, my masters-A, all of you -L, look for-T, torment.

"3d. A word for caution, take this: A drunkard is the annoyance of modesty-the spoiler of civility-the destroyer of reason the brewer's agent-the alewife's benefactor-the wife's sorrow his children's trouble-his neighbor's scoff-a walking swill-tub-a picture of a beast-a monster of a man." The youngsters found the truth so unpalatable, that they soon deserted their preacher, glad to get beyond the reach of his voice.

ELOQUENCE OF BASCOM.

The following passages will serve to illustrate the peculiar oratorical style of Rev. Henry B. Bascom, the distinguished Kentucky preacher :

"Chemistry, with its fire-tongs of the galvanic battery, teaches that the starry diamond in the crown of kings, and the black carbon which the peasant treads beneath his feet, are both composed of the same identical elements; analysis also proves that a chief ingredient in limestone is carbon. Then let the burning breath of God pass over all the limestone of the earth, and bid its old mossy layers crystalize into new beauty; and lo! at the Almighty fiat the mountain ranges flash into living gems with a lustre that renders midnight noon, and eclipses all the stars!"

He urged the same view by another example, still better adapted to popular apprehension:

"Look yonder," said the impassioned orator, pointing a motionless finger towards the lofty ceiling, as if it were the sky. "See that wrathful thunder-cloud-the fiery bed of the lightnings and hissing hail-the cradle of tempests and floods! -What can be more dark, more dreary, more dreadful? Say, scoffing skeptic, is it capable of any beauty? You pronounce, 'no.' Well, very well; but behold, while the sneering denial curls your proud lips, the sun with its sword of light shears through the sea of vapors in the west, and laughs in your incredulous face with his fine golden eye. Now, look again at the thunder-cloud! See! where it was blackest and fullest of gloom, the sunbeams have kissed its hideous cheek; and where the kiss fell there is now a blush, brighter than ever mantled on the brow of mortal maiden-the rich blush of crimson and gold, of purple and vermilion-a pictured blush, fit for the gaze of angels-the flower-work of pencils of fire and light, wrought at a dash by one stroke of the right hand of God! Ay, the ugly cloud hath given birth to the rainbow, that perfection and symbol of unspeakable beauty!"

THE LORD BISHOP.

The following incident is said to have occurred in the parish church of Bradford, England, during a special service, on the occasion of a visit from the bishop of the diocese :

The clerk, before the sermon, gave out the psalm in broad Wiltshire dialect, namely:-"Let us zing to the praayze an' glawry o' God, three varsses o' the hundred and vourteen zaam -a varsion 'specially 'dapted to the 'caasion,-by meself:"

Why hop ye zo, ye little hills,

An' what var de'e skip?

Is it 'cas you'm proud to see
His grace the Lard Biship?

Why skip ye zo, ye little hills,
An' what var de'e hop?

Is it 'cas to preach to we

Is com'd the Lard Bishop?

Eese; he is com'd to preach to we:
Then let us aul strick up,

An' zing a glawrious zong of praayze,
An' bless the Lard Bishup!

THE PREACHERS OF CROMWELL'S TIME.

Dr. Echard says of the preachers who lived in the time of Cromwell,-"Coiners of new phrases, drawers-out of long godly words, thick pourers-out of texts of Scripture, mimical squeakers and bellowers, vain-glorious admirers only of themselves, and those of their own fashioned face and gesture; such as these shall be followed, shall have their bushels of China oranges, shall be solaced with all manner of cordial essences, and shall be rubbed down with Holland of ten shillings an ell."

One of the singular fashions that prevailed among the preachers of those days was that of coughing or hemming in the middle of a sentence, as an ornament of speech; and when their sermons were printed, the place where the preacher coughed or hemmed was always noted in the margin. This practice was not confined to England, for Olivier Maillard, a Cordelier, and famous preacher, printed a sermon at Brussels in the year 1500, and marked in the margin where the preacher hemmed once or twice, or coughed.

Puritan Peculiarities.

SURNAMES.

THE following names are given in Lower's English Sirnames, as specimens of the names of the old Puritans in England about the year 1658. They are taken from a jury-list in Sussex county. They will cause a smile in our day :

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Fight-the-good-fight-of-faith White, The-peace-of-God Knight.

SIMILES.

Prayer is Faith's pump, where 't works till the water come;
If't comes not free at first, Faith puts in some.
Prayer is the sacred bellows; when these blow,
How doth that live-coal from God's altar glow!

Faithful Teate's Ter. Tria., 1658.

Walking in the streets, I met a cart that came near the wall; so I stepped aside, to avoid it, into a place where I was secure enough. Reflection: Lord, sin is that great evil of which thou complainest that thou art pressed as a cart is pressed: how can it then but bruise me to powder?-Caleb Trenchfield's Chris. Chymestree.

PUNISHMENTS.

From the early records of Massachusetts we learn that the following singular punishments were inflicted in that colony two hundred years ago:

Sir Richard Salstonstall, fined four bushels of malt for his absence from the court.

Josias Plaistowe, for stealing four baskets of corn from the Indians, to return them eight baskets again, to be fined £5, and hereafter to be called Josias, not Mr. as he used to be.

Thomas Peter, for suspicions of slander, idleness, and stubbornness, is to be severely whipped and kept in hold.

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