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Name of a Widow, but was never Married ; for sure, the Churchmen that prohibit unequal zacking, could never be guilty of linking any Christian with such a Succaba; yet to prove her Marriage, the Hagg conjures for the Ghost of a good Bishop departed, and wou'd scandalize that pious Man, as Pander Canonical to her Letchery: Her Husband, she pretends, dy'd at Sea: Indeed, 'tis no Wonder he should be cast away in such a filthy leaky Bottom; for all those must needs be Shipwrack'd, that cast Anchor in her Embraces. She is Old, and has nothing of Woman left in her, but Luft and Tongue; and the latter brings in Contribution for the former. She has quite ruin'd the Daubers, and bawdy Occupations, pretending a Patent to Monopolize both those Mysteries. Her Chamber is the Common-shore of the Town: The long Cellar of Amsterdam is not more frequented, and she has an Allowance of five or fix Dishes for Supper, to bring Young Ones together; she is there the Mother of the Daids, riding Admiral of a Squadron of Privateers, and holding forth in the Conventicle of the Family of Love: Marriages are there promoted, that were never made in HEAVEN, nor, does Doctors Commons in a Twelve Month determine half so many smutty Controversies as are here dispatch'd in an Évening ; all the Amorous Intrigues are grave, . ly decided in the Divan, and the Pun&ual Quota for all Keepers of all Qualities to al
low their Mistresses. 'Tis the Supream Council, next to that of White-hall, for regulatingVenereal Affairs, and there is not a Harlot of Quality that walks the Park, but thence takes her Meafures for Price and Choice of ber Cullies.
To give a more particular Character of her Perfon, we may call her the Epitome of Uglinefs, an Original drawn by Natures Pencil, whereof Granny Shipton, Mother Louse, and Gammer Damnable were but imperfe& Copies; Her plaistred Face drops against ill Weather, and whenshe laughs, it looks like a Ruffled Boot, and her folitary Tooth like an old Candle in the middle of its she is Beetle braw'd, Wood-cock-nos'd, as crooked in Body as in Mind, her Skin Peaseporrige Tawny, or somewhat inclining to the oriental Complexion of Rusty Bacon, beset with Datural Rubies, and Carbuncles, yet always bare almoft down to the Centre, and two or three buge black Patches to turn the Efflorescences of her Hide into Beauty.spots z. as for the other infernal Parts, the Devil deals there altogether: For they lie under the Torrid Zone, and therefore utterly uninhabitable, only some bold Travellers that have ventur'd, represent them much like the Departs of Arabia, horrible Wild and Barren,not so much as aBush to be met with, nor any thing but venomous Gulfs, like the Lacus Asphaltites, or Concave of Mount Strombulo, belching out continually sulfurons Flames, e. nough to destroy all that approach them. In. deed, her Breath wou'd rout an Army sooner
tban that of a Cannon, and Lay a Devil better than all Trismegistus's Charms ; it blusters in her Nore, like the Wind in a foul Chimney, and by its Violence, bas 'not only spoil'd ber Brains, but blown off the Hair of her Pericranium, which The now supplies with borrow'd Towers and artificial' Borders. By one word she is able to blast a Rose at Three Score Yards distance: "And her SOUL, if she has one, (which furely was only given to Dam her more compleatly) seems composed of Alsafatida and Brimstone.
Wilches of old usd to Pils in a Hole in the Earth, and by padling in'; 'rais'd Storms and Tempésts; but this wayward Sister, resolving
upon some greater Exploit, has, as it is said, sent to Scotland for a Silver Chamber-pot; and
if ever it should artive, 'tis to be fear'd, wou'd do more mischief than all their Poisons at Paris: To prevent which, if any person can make a Discovery, and bring her to her Old Rendez Douz, at the Palace before mentioned, he shall have One Thousand Pound Scotch for his pains; and also be cured of an Old Pox, or Young Gonorrhea, which he pleases, by her Worshipful Daddy, Gratis
The Lo MISTRESS, A Complaint
againft the Countess of By tbe Duke of Buckingham, in the rear 16753
June the 12th.
By Nature for despairing Sorrows made,
While she to Truth and me unjust does prove,
watch'd Eyes A foft beguiling Slumber did surprize; Whose Aatering Comfort prov'd both short and
vain, Refresh'd, like Slaves from Racks, to greater