by Will as before he was turned off. This is well known to the old and conftant cuftomers, who grin in a corner to fee Hal act the great man, while he is obliged to flip flily three or four times a day to Will for his advice and inftructions. It is little lefs amufing to fee Will fit down in the remoteft corner of the coffee-room, an unconcerned fpectator, and affecting a total ignorance of all the concerns of the inn, and to hear him talk of felling off his property to pay his debts, when every body knows he has feathered his nett well, and may have every thing in Hal's power to grant. The under-waiters and hoftlers in particular laugh in their fleeves to fee the humbug carried on be tween them, and none more than your humble fervant, BOOTS. BILLY THE IMPERIAL DILLY. ILLY P―, old established driver of the Imperial Dilly, hereby acquaints the Nobility, Gentry, and Public in general, that having had fome complaints of his man Simple, who has driven during his fhort abfence, occafioned by unavoidable circumftances, he intends very foon to take the reins and the whip again into his own hands; and he hopes to give fatisfaction to his friends. In the mean time Billy P. begs leave to affure his friends, that there is no truth in the reports of his having made over his contract for driving the Imperial Dilly to Simple, as has been malicioufly faid by the Proprietors of the Old Oppofition Coach. The truth is, that Billy P. finding himfelf hampered with certain Irish concerns, and fome French bufinefs, which he could not bring to a fettlement, was obliged to keep in the back ground for a time, but he is happy to think that his affairs will fpecdily be adjufted to the fatif faction faction of all parties. During this Irish bufinefs Billy P. was advifed to quit the box, and accordingly he thought of putting Simple forward, as being a quiet, inoffenfive fellow, who had rode many a year in the basket, blowing his horn to let the people know when the coach was fetting off and coming in, morning and evening. Simple, as all the world knows, is a fober, well-conditioned creature, that does what he is bidden, and never could dream of setting up for himself.—Billy P. therefore recommends his friends to put up with Simple a little longer. To be fure, he goes on at a fmall pace; but he is fafe, and, unlefs run againft by the new dafhing Paris Diligence, the Bonaparte, will not overturn the carriage. Tally-ho, the French Driver, and Simple, have indeed been fhaking their whips at one another for fome days paft, and the paffengers in the Imperial Dilly have been splashed, notwithstanding each bound himself by Treaty to keep his own fide of the way. Simple, however, is directed, for the prefent, to make no difturbance on the road, fo that there is little danger of immediate accidents. As foon as Billy in perfon takes the whip, he may perhaps one day run himfelf in the way of Tally-ho, as he did before, having care at the fame time to get witneffes to fwear that he was on his own fide. By this trick he about nine years ago threw the Paris Dilly into a ditch; though, to fay the truth, the expenfe of the repairs of his own coach, for the damages it fuftained, is not paid off to this day! No matter, the Proprietors pay all with a hearty good-will -no inquiries made! The Coach will start, as ufual, from the bottom of Parliament Street, bait at the Treafury, and take a whet at fome of the public offices. Paffengers fet down according as they agree, at any place between St. James's and the India-house. Billy P. likewife acquaints his friends, that as he has always run very capital cattle, he intends to start with an entire new fet of hacks, fuperior to any in the kingdom, fome with blood, fome with bone, fome Irith, of high mettle, fome of the Scots breed, very ufeful, drudging, ferviceable animals; and he expects that he fhall fhew in his harnefs fome old racers that have won the King's Plate! He has now fome pure beafts in his eye, and is fure of a bargain! N. B. The New Oppofition Coach will foon give in, as Billy P. offers the drivers and guard a fmall concern in his driving business. B. P. warns his friends not to venture into the Old Oppofition Coach, which has been very ill driven of late. One has got on the box, and allows his cattle no vats. It is thought he was only started against Simpli for the fake of the joke, and though he always run him pretty hard, never got before him but three times! ROYAL CABINET OF CURIOSITIES. NOTWITHSTANDING the boafts of foreigners concerning the ingenuity, industry, and learning of their naturalifts and antiquaries, we may fafely affirm that our own King has now the most curious Cabinet that ever was collected. The intrinfic value of the articles may be fmall, and perhaps it would be a very eafy matter to pick up any one of them in a country village; but the collection, in rarity, fingularity, and ftrangeness, far excels every thing hitherto poffeffed by a Prince. The number of weeds is aftonifhing, the coins are chiefly counterfeits, got together with infinite care, and the ftatues are fo admirably mutilated, that there is fcarcely a head among the whole. WHAT WHAT IS A PRIME MINISTER LIKE? MR. EDITOR, [From the Morning Chronicle.] UNHAPPILY much caufe of offence has been given to the worthy Anti-Jacobins, and loyal France-haters, of this realm, by an unfortunate comparifon which was made of the late Minifter to a Jackboot; and the propriety of its application has been denied or afferted by the refpective parties, which divide the kingdom, with a vehemence and virulence of controverfy which the queftion does not feem to deferve. For this reafon I have been cafting about to find a fimile which fhall accommodate all parties. I ave fent out my invention to range for it through art and nature I have fought it among "all the birds in the air," and all the fifhes in the fea;" and I think that at last I have difcovered exactly what I wanted. Whoever has been at Sadler's Wells, Mr. Editor, muft needs have obferved a confpicuous character, invefted with a coat of motley, and armed with a word of wood, whofe mother was a Fairy, and who performs all his magic operations by means of infernal demons, a Skipping, fhifting, evafive character, in a mask. This Right Honourable Perfonage is attended by a Clown, fometimes called Pierrot, and fometimes Ralph, the conftant mark and butt of his roguifh tricks, who neverthelefs officiously abets Mr. Harlequin in his defigns upon the Frencht Gentleman's daughter. *From this appendage antiquaries undoubtedly derive his lineal défcent from the old Fool or Vice, who With dagger of lath, In his rage and his wrath, Cried ha ha! to the Devil. + The Pantaloon is evidently of French extraction, as the name denotes, Pantaloon (Fr.), which Bailey explains to be " a garment worn, anciently, confifting of breeches and ftockings faftened together, and both of the fame ftuff." VOL. V. FF This This Harlequin is a Prime Minifter. His mother is faid to be a Fairy, because Fairies are fuppofed to poffefs the power of bestowing upon their children, with a wish, riches, and wisdom, and power: a Minifter is neceffarily rich, wife, and powerful, by virtue of his office. His agents are infernal demons: here we are obliged to paufe, and confefs, that, in this one inftance, the parallel does not run exactly even. A British Houfe of Commons, elected by the free fuffrages of the people, is the natural agent and inftrument of a Minifter. Harlequin is invefted with a coat of motley: this is that ingenious quality, by aid of which a Prime Minister is enabled to adapt his fpeeches and actions to the colours of exifting circumftances. Harlequin is full of shifts and evafions: when you think that furely you have caught him, and shall now hold him faft, hey! Prefto! be gone! the nimble Gentleman changes more fhapes than Proteus, and will certainly flip through your fingers. Whoever has attended to the conduct of Minifters in Parliament, and how next to impoffible it is to get faft hold of them, and force them to give a direct anfwer, will find no difficulty in applying the parallel in this cafe. Harlequin wears a mask: 1 pray, who ever faw the plain naked face of a Minifter's genuine meaning? Harlequin's face is black: this is typified by a Minifter's never blushing. He is armed with a fword of wood, weak and inefficient against foreign enemies in the field, but mighty and effectual to produce civil commotions and inteftine combustions at home-to alter the appearances and fubftances of things: by means of this fword a Minifter fhall convert a flourithing empire into a defert; he shall caufe bread to be changed into ftones, gold into paper, and paper to be taken for true and proper gald; he fhall forge chains for the legs, and padlocks and gags for the mouth, which he will perfuade the wearers to be nothing elfe but convenient irnaments and fecurity for the legs in walk |