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usually consumed; and appoint larger allowances of bone to all mutton chops.

I remain, Sir,

Most profoundly yours,

June 8, Swan Tavern, near St. Martin's Lane.

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E. M.

-E'en such a man, so woe-begone!

WE 7HEN Wardle began the political line, The world all predicted his speedy decline; But his friends, as excusing, one reason would quote'Twas a contract refus'd for an army great coat. But when on reforming abuses he spoke, For the coat they agreed-his reform was a cloak.

SHAKSPEARE.

ANOTHER.

W THEN Uproar for Freedom no longer shall pass,

With Waithman departed; the skin of the ass
May still stand in very good stead :

For the use of our army, then chang'd to a drum,
Though troublesome once, he may useful become,
And still make a noise though he's dead.

ROYAL BALL.

[From the Morning Herald, June 18.]

"Laugh at the pert and foolish; if they're sore,
So much the better-you may laugh the more!"

POPE.

THE HE splenetic conversazionis which have prevailed for some days, amongst those who could not reasonably have expected to receive cards of invitation, are whimsical beyond measure, and would afford matter in plenty for an additional scene to the School for

Scandal.

Scandal. The following sketch of a dialogue that took place a day or two past, may give some idea of various other colloquies, which the disappointed hopes and pride of the mortified and resentful have called forth

SCENE-Berkeley Square.

Lady BAB RESTLESS, Hon. Mrs. UPTONGUE, Miss JUNIPER, and Sir HARRY EASY, seated.

Sir Harry Easy. Nay, nay, every body, you know, my dear Lady Bab, could not have been thought of.

Lady Bab. But if you please, Sir Harry, nobody of my rank in life ought to have been forgotten!

Miss J. Lady Juniper, my mamma, might have had tickets for us both, had she condescended to owe an obligation to a page of the back stairs.

Sir Harry E-. I don't doubt it, my dear.

Hon. Mrs. U. For my part, I can bear any mortification but silent contempt. My grandmother, by my revered father's side, was bedchamber-woman, to the Princess Dowager of Ws; of course, we call ourselves of the family, and therefore ought not to have been neglected!

Miss J. And sure there's no such mighty favour in it; for I am well informed, that there will be plenty of tickets on Wednesday morning, at Hookham's, dog-cheap, after all.

Lady Bab. What a ridiculous melange there must be! If all should come who are invited, there will be some miraculous appearances, as tickets are gone out to three Dowager Countesses, and two Baronets' widows, who have lain quietly in their graves for seven years, to my knowledge.-(General laugh.)

Sir Harry. Very good, Lady Bab!
Miss J. How preposterous!

Lady Bab. It can be but a Bartholomew-fair business, after all the fuss that has been made about it; M. 3

for

for Shn, who you know is manager, told me but this very morning, that he was obliged to send an express' down to Birmingham for the acting horses to come up to entertain the company!

Hon. Mrs. U. How brutal!

Sir Harry. Too excellent, I fear, to be true! Miss J. I heard him tell my mamma the thing, 'pon honour!

lion. Mrs. U. Then as to the national good they talk so much about; though I think I am full as charitable as my neighbours, I cannot see what earthly good cau arise from setting the Spital Fields weavers, and other raw-bone fellows, to work in this way, who might be more usefully employed in fighting against that monster Buonaparte in Spain and Portugal!

Sir Harry. But surely, Ma'am thus dispensing bread to so many deserving families of the indigent, and in such distressful times

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very same

Miss J. Nonsense, Sir Harry!-Have we not asy. lums and workhouses for them in plenty?

Hon. Mrs. U. But you have a ticket, Lady Bab, no doubt?

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Lady Bab. Not I.-Knowing what kind of affair it would be, I wrote to Colonel Thing-a'-me, desiring that I might not be troubled with a card.

Sir Harry. That's rather strange, Lady Bab! Pray how long may this kind of capriccio

Lady Bab. Not at all strange, Sir! Why, you heard me say a hundred times, that I would not have gone to it for the world.

"I would not go for all the world,
The thing will be so low !"
"That is, my Lady Bab," quoth I,
"You'd give the world to go !"

Sir Harry. Certainly so-and there was so much fiction, as well as fancy, in the idea, that I have thought it worth while thus to record it in jingle:

Lady

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Lady Bab. Vastly clever, Sir; but my pride on this occasion is proof against all your jingling jokes! Hon. Mrs. U. And would you not really go, my dear, if

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Lady Bab. As I've a little soul to be saved

[Enter Servant.]

Servant. A gem'man, in one of the Royal liveries, brought this to be delivered into your Ladyship's own hands. [Exit

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Lady Bab. Royal livery![Taking a card out of its cover, reuds, partly aside. -Colonel commanded by Prince Regent !"Oh, charming to desire Lady Bab Restless's company!". What a delightful princely creature! at Carlton House to celebrate birthday earnestly desired dresses manufactures-kingdom!"---How thoughtful! What a splendid spectacle it will be!

Miss J. I hope to God she has not procured one at Jast [Aside.]

Sir Harry. If I mistake not, Lady Bab, although it stuck some time in the wheel, the ticket is come up a prize at last. [Lady Bab, musing.] Hon. Mrs. U. Why, surely she would not go, Sir Harry, after all that she has said, and almost sworn to the contrary..

Sir Harry, Oh! my life against the little fluctuating soul which she would so hastily have pledged, but she will !

Lady Bab,-[Kissing the card, and carefully replacing it in the envelope.]-Well, my dear creatures, you must excuse me; we shall meet at Catalani's hermi tage-thing to-morrow! What a triumph over the D-woods, the Macf-nes; and, best of all, over that little spiteful devil, Lady Emily Tattle! [Aside. Sir Harry, Come, Lady Bab, I perceive that you

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have

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for Shn, who you know is manager, told me but this very morning, that he was obliged to send an express down to Birmingham for the acting horses to come up to entertain the company!

Hon. Mrs. U. How brutal!

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Sir Harry. Too excellent, I fear, to be true! Miss J. I heard him tell thing, 'pon honour !

my mamma the very same

lion. Mrs. U. Then as to the national good they talk so much about; though I think I am full as charitable as my neighbours, I cannot see what earthly good can arise from setting the Spital Fields weavers, and other raw-bone fellows, to work in this way, who might be more usefully employed in fighting against that monster Buonaparte in Spain and Portugal!

Sir Harry. But surely, Ma'am thus dispensing bread to so many deserving families of the indigent, and in such distressful times→→→

Miss J. Nonsense, Sir Harry!-Have we not asy. lums and workhouses for them in plenty?

Hon. Mrs. U. But you have a ticket, Lady Bab, no doubt ?

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Lady Bab. Not I.-Knowing what kind of affair it would be, I wrote to Colonel Thing-a’-me, desiring that I might not be troubled with a card.

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Sir Harry. That's rather strange, Lady Bab! Pray how long may this kind of capriccio

Lady Bab. Not at all strange, Sir! Why, you heard me say a hundred times, that I would not have gone to it for the world.

Sir Harry. Certainly so-and there was so much fiction, as well as fancy, in the idea, that I have thought it worth while thus to record it in jingle:

"I would not go for all the world,
The thing will be so low !"
"That is, my Lady Bab," quoth I,
"You'd give the world to go!"

Lady

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