Officers, sailors, and soldiers, with branches of ever-green oak, and colours furled. Above an hundred shepherds and shepherdesses in white, elegantly adorned with flowers, blue and white ribbons, &c.; the men bearing crooks, the women rakes. Above three hundred children, uniformly and elegantly clothed in white, crowned with ever-green oak, and adorned with blue and white ribbons. When the procession was thus arranged, and ready to move, Neptune, who had previously given the Earl Marshal a warrant to assemble the people, presented bim with another commission, constituting him generalissimo of all the sea and land forces who were come to witness the ceremonies; and when this last commission had been read, by a herald, Mercu ry issued a proclamation through a speaking trumpet; after which a song, entitled "The New Rule Britannia," was most charmingly sung. The conch then sounded, and the procession marched. The ceremonies after the march closed with a speech made by the Earl Marshal. It was observed that almost every peasant wore an appropriate motto, and was dressed with a degree of elegance seldom equalled, even in classic Italy. Thus were the poetical descriptions of Arcadia realized; and peace celebrated by a pastoral drama, in which there were at least a thousand actors and actresses, all of whom performed as well as if they had been trained to the stage! &c. to Earl Marshal's First Appointment. Neptune, monarch of the ocean, and all seas, rivers, lakes, rivulets, springs, &c. &c. son of Mars. By virtue of this our royal warrant, passed in the year of our reign 5764; We, Neptune, monarch of the ocean, &c. as aforesaid, do constitute, appoint, and commission, you, the said -, son of Mars, to assemble all, or as many of our trusty and well-beloved sons, and also as many of your brothers in arms as may be so inclined, on the 19th instant; when, being well pleased with the glory acquired during the last four lustres by our beloved daughter Britannia, we purpose to confer on her our sovereign power; and we hereby direct our herald, Mercury, to enjoin you, the said (commander of the sons of Mars who may witness this august ceremony,) to be especially careful to keep order, that nothing may impede our progress, from the time we land upon the Exmouth shore, to that when we re-visit our coral caves of Ocean. And further, be it known to all men, that whoever disregards this our royal will and pleasure, may chance to be punished by catching nothing but gudgeons and dog-fish all the rest of their lives. Given at our palace in the caves of Ocean, during this DCXLIX Olympiad. NEPTUNE. Earl Marshal's Second Appointment. Neptune, monarch of the ocean, &c. to son of Mars. We, Neptune, monarch of the ocean, &c. having had good and long experience of your prowess, prudence, and fidelity, do make choice, and by these, nominate and appoint you, our right trusty and well beloved cousin of all your brothers in arms, sons of Mars, to be generalissimo of all our sons, and also who may be present this day; when, being well pleased with the glory acquired during the last four lustres by our beloved daughter Britannia, we purpose to confer on her our sovereign power; and in testimony of our reality we have, with our own hand, affixed our great seal of the ocean uuto these our commission and letters, ma king them patents. Witness ourself, in the caves of Ocean,during this DCXLIX Olympiad. NEPTUNE. Mercury's Proclamation. This is to give notice, that I, Mercury, Messenger of the Heathen Divinities, have descended from Olympus to inform all mortals whom it may concern, that at one o'clock this day, will be disposed of, wholesale and retail, old English hospitality sufficient to feed four thousand people; sterling good mind; and loyalty sufficient to protect the humour sufficient to make men ail of one British throne till time shall be no more. A large stock of gratitude for the blessings of peace would likewise have been offered to the public had they not possessed ample the sale will abound in mirth without licen store of that already. It is hoped however and a cargo of content sufficient to supply tiousness, conviviality without drunkenness, every person present. Neptune's Thanks, by the Earl Marshal. Britons! I am directed by our sovereign lord and master, Neptune, the son of Saturn and Ops, God of the Ocean, &c. to inform you he is well pleased at having so numerous a company of attendants; and returns thanks to all his own sons, and likewise to all the sons of Mars, and every other person belonging to the procession, for their regularity and good order this day at the same time most earnestly hoping that not one link of the chain which now manacles Mars, may ever henceforth be broken. The only method our sovereign lord can devise of rewarding all present is to entreat them to partake of old English fare, roast beef and plum pudding, with ale and cider, more delicious than the celebrated nectar of the gods. New 1814.] Nuisance of close Corporations. New "God save the King." God save great George, our king! Long live our noble king! God save the king! While he, with conquest crown'd, Prais'd is by nations round, Let Albion's isles rebound, Long live our king!"'4 He, who half Europe sway'd, And,mid the cannons' roar, New "Rule Britannia." To sickles turn your trusty swords; Then haste, O haste, with every sail unfurl'd, (Masters of the Ocean-world,) Haste, O haste, to reap in foreign fields, All the wealth which Commerce yields. Neptune.-Go, adopted sons of mine! To you the Trident I resign: Haste, O haste, and o'er the subject main, From age to age, securely reign! Haste, O haste, and by your virtues prove Britons merit NEPTUNE's love. Britannia. And now, that life-destroying WAR Forsakes at length his crimson car, Seek, O seek, the smarting wounds to heal, Which half the sons of Europe feel! Seek, O seck, by charities like these, Earth to bless, and Heaven to please! Seek to dry the widow's tear, Seek her orphan babe to rear; Seek, O seek, by charities like these, Earth to bless, and Heaven to please! Chorus-Rule Britannia, Britannia rule the main, With Peace and Freedom in thy train ! To the Editor of the Monthly Magazine. 513 that is there predominant; but I had no sooner taken up my residence in the country, a corporate town, with a population of seven thousand, than I discovered my mistake. I found I had exchanged independence for servility, li berality for bigotry, public spirit for sycophancy. I immediately began to consider, is there not a cause, and soon discovered the root of the evil. Never, to my recollection, having heard of a political body-corporate before, I was amazed to find such a dreg of the feudal system the grand moving wheel of public government in the country:-/ -A population of seven thousand domineered over and represented, or rather misrepresented, by a self-elected corporation of forty superannuated old men, or conceited upstarts! These political body-corporates elect themselves according to charter; elect also the representatives of the town, (as they are called) to serve in parliament; persecute with all the weight of office, any constitutional ebullition of public spirit; send petitions to the King and two houses of parliament, in the name of the town they are absolutely pests to, and which petitions are generally opposite to the real sentiments of the place; single out and persecute any inhabitant who subscribes to or countenances an independent publication; and besides all, which keep down the prosperity of the place where they exist, because few will subject themselves to their domineering influence. I have often wondered that, in this age of civilization, no one has attempted to remove that cark remnant of the feudal system-political body-corporates: from my own observations, and from the observation of your readers, they oppose all improvement, find it their interest to keep the population in mental darkness, and are constant propagators of ill-blood and dissatisfaction. If it is impossible to abolish these political body-corporates, it seems in opposition to the allowed tenor of British law, that they should elect their own body, and also elect the repre sentatives of the town they belong to. If a body corporate elect the represen tatives of a town, it seems a fair rational thing that the population of the town should elect the corporation; but, accord. ing to the present constitution of a ma. jority of British towns, instead of the po pulation participating in the constitution of our country, which is its undoubted birthright; the mass of inhabitants know nothing nothing more of British liberty, than paying their hard-earned mite to an oppressive taxation; the being subject to a military ballot, sometimes two or three times in a twelvemonth, and to a suc cession of gratuitous, laborious parish offices, often two at a time, according to the pleasure of a body-corporate. March 17, 1814. AN ENGLISHMAN. POPULATION OF NOTTINGHAMSHIRE, by the Returns of 1811. Broxtow, North and South Divi 7,922 8,435 32 320 1,796 6,295 344 20,566 21,552 42,118 3,319 3,917 7,236 110 6,815 305 15,495 18,758 34,253 - 1,364 1.564 Totals 31,344 33,514 164 954 12293 18,928 2,293 179,057 83,845 162,900 POPULATION Totals 22,702 25,006 116499 13,646 7,655 | 3,705 59,132 60,059 119,191 SIR, Tcellent Magazine is distinguished, HE impartiality for which your ex induces me to hope, that you will indulge me with permission (through the medium of it,) to make a few observations in reply to D. B. P. Eccleston's animadversions, in your last publication, on the reported conduct of the parishioners of one place, and that of a clergyman of another place, in the vicinity of Penrith, relative to the burial of an unbaptized child. The account itself, in my opinion, is highly improbable, and the spirit in which the "remarks" on it are made, is quite unjustifiable. The paragraph which contains the account, is said to have been taken from a provincial paper. Why did not this writer name the paper? But, allowing 7,931 8,449 16,380 the fact of its having appeared in such paper, is this writer so credulous as to believe implicitly every unauthenticated singular circumstance," that is inserted in a newspaper? Does he believe, for instance, that Buonaparte loves the English, and wishes to live among them? But, let us proceed to examine the statements of this extraordinary story. A farmer had a child that died unbaptized, and "the parishioners refused it burial." Pray, what had the parishioners to do with the affair? One would suppose that the minister of the parish was the only proper person to apply to, and to decide, on such an occasion. But the minister, it seems, was out of the question; who, no doubt, if apprised of the case, would have informed the farmer that his child might be buried, though he was forbidden, by the regu lations Jations of the church, to perform the "rites of sepulture;" or, in other words, to read the burial service. On this disappointment, the corpse was carried into another parish, "where a grave was prepared" for it. Strange, that a grave should be prepared by the sexton, or any one else, for an extra parochial funeral, without previously Consulting the resident minister, without whose consent it could not be done; as no corpse has a 66 right of sepulture," out of the parish in which its decease took place. Yet, so it appears to have happened in this instance. The knowledge of the proposed interment seems to have come somehow accidentally and suddenly to the "worthy vicar." If, treated with such disregard, he objected to it, he did what was quite proper. If a corpse is carried about from one parish to another, without due notice, and with out a proper application to the officiating minister, it is a palpable violation of decency and order, and surviving friends ought to be taught better manners. The worthy vicar, then, (as we are told) "having ordered the grave to be filled up again," they were necessitated to return home, with "the poor innocent child," and "seek out for some other place of burial." But, why not specify that other place, and give the parishioners or vicar thereof (not suffer ing the corpse (< to rot, or be worried by dogs, or devoured by crows,") the credit to which their humanity intitled them? This, however, for some reason or other, is omitted. So much for the probability of this lamentable tale. I will now beg leave, Mr. Editor, to advert to the quo animo of the writer. What could be his motive? The story be relates he considers so disgraceful to the vicar, to christianity, and to the established religion, that he solemnly deprecates the knowledge of it, even in Westmoreland, and in the streets of Kendal, (places at no great distance from Penrith,) lest the unbelieving and irreligious in those parts should have just cause for exultation. And yet, how curious! he requests the insertion of this very same dismal story, Sir, in your valuable repository, because "it deserves to be known beyond the limits of the circulation of the paper," in which it was first published! And, moreover, while he would preclude occasion, forsooth, to the enemies of religion to revile, see how he himself reviles-how tauntingly he exclaims, "the worthy, worthy, worthy *icar!" and how disposed he appears to denounce both the vicar and the parish ioners, as inferior to Hottentots in feelings of humanity! In short, Mr. Editor, to tell you my mind plainly and honestly, I consider the paragraph in question as a mere fabrication; and the "remarks" of your correspondent upon it, as made with no other view than to depreciate our ve nerable church-establishment, and vilify the character of her respectable ministers. The poison is gone abroad; pray, Sir, let the antidote follow it as soon as you T. C. can. Westbury, May 11, 1814. To the Editor of the Monthly Magazine. SEV papers have appeared in your Magazine on the subject of making coffee; a matter which I think so simple, that I wonder there can be any difficulty upon the subject. All the various methods that have been practised or recommended, might so easily be tried and at so little expence, that every person in the habit of drinking coffee might try them. The only two methods that I know of, and between which the dispute lies, as to which is preferable, are infusion or decoction. Until very lately the constant practice was by decoction, as it was judged impossible to extract the virtues of the coffee without boiling it: of late it has been found that coffee yields its flavor by simple infusion, and that pouring boiling water upon it when ground to a powder, will extract all that is wanting to make a cup of good coffee. The question then is, What is wanted from coffee for the purposes intended? That coffee does not contain any farinaceous or mucilaginous particles, I apprehend will not be disputed: then all that appears to be wanted is to give a flavor to the liquor, and if this can be procured by simply pouring boiling water upon it, then the most simple process the best. is One of your correspondents recommends putting an egg with the shell, and boiling up with the coffee to clear it. Whatever effect the white of eggs may have, it is certainly a fact, that the shell can be of no use; besides, the shells of eggs are not always so clean as to render them desirable to be boiled in coffee; it would be difficult also to prove, that the yolk of the egg has any thing to do with making it clear after boiling; I think the white of the egg is the only part that is of |