Page images
PDF
EPUB

Τ Η Ε

BRITISH APOLLO.

VOL. I.

F

APOLLO's Address to the Town by

way of PROLOGUE. Righted

from earth by scenes of death and wars, Domestick Strifes and military

scars,
The mournful widow's tears, and orphan's cries,

And universal groans which pierce the skies,
I left the globe, in wild confusion bwrld,
Nor spread my influence o'er the rufled world ;
But sweetly rolled my peaceful hours away,
In the bright mansions of eternal day,
And greatly Shining thro those bleft abodes,
Encreas'd the knowledge of the wifeft Gods;
Long we neglected man, and vom'd that he,
No more the fav'rite of our realms should be

But on a sudden, shouts of praise were giu'n,
And UNION echoed to the gates of heav'n.
Each awful being mock’d, look'd down to see,
The unbeliev'd, amazing prodigy;
And Jove surpriz'd, and pleas' d to see it done,
By Anoa's deeds, once more to mortals won,
Sent me and all the Gods to earth again,

To bless the wondrous worth of her illustrious reign. Hail therefore happy fons of Britain's ifle

,
On whom the powʻrs of heav'n, united smile,
With gentle welcome greet me on your shore,
Nor let me meet the fate I found before.
VOL. I,

B

Q. What. Q. What is the cause of the blackness in the Negroes, and how came that people first to be black ?

A. The most accurate of the modern anatomists have observ'd, that there is a certain gluc or varnish, called by them CORPUS MUCOSUM , immediately under the EPIDERMIS, and that in different animals, or in different parts of the fame animal, being of a different colour, it imports it to the EPIDERMIS, wbich of its self is transparent. 'Tis then to be fupposed that this glue or gelly in the Negroes is black. But still the question will be how came it to be fo in them and white in us ? to which it may be easily answer'd, that every one naturally begetting its like, 'tis no wonder the children of Blacks should be black : and then we must come to the latter part of the question, viz. How the first parents of the black generation came to be of that huc ? which is not so easy to be determined; for to say that it was a punishment inflicted upon Cham and his posterity, is a very groundless fuppofition; we rather think that their going naked in a climate, where the sun is extream hot, did contribute a little to it, by scorching as it were the thick juice aformentioned, as we see that violent heat of fire turns black several bodies; we also may conjecture that they might use some art to make this black colour the deepe er, as 'tis related the Hotentots, or natives of the Cape of good Hope, do at this day, anointing their children with a mixture of foot and oil, and so expose them naked to the heat of the fun : this huc might be more strongly fixt in them after , by the force of imagination, by their women ( when pregnant ) always beholding such. A famous precedent whereof, we have in history, of a white Lady's conceiving a Black, from her continual looking on a Negro's picture. Sacred Writ gives us the like instance in brute creatures,

Q. Why the noise of a file, faw, &c. fets the teeth on edge 4. Because the particles of the air thus moved

[ocr errors]

into disagreeable undulations, and being disproporciond to the pores of the nerves that are inserted in che roots of the teeth do so distort and twitch them, that they are either benumb'd or affected with pain.

Q. What is the reafon, that looking down from any bigh place, a man's head turns, and he is ready to fall ?

A. Because the diftance of objects and the mighty sense of danger so extreamly terrifies the imagination, and creates such a confusion and disorder amongst the spirits in the brain, that they are altogether incapable of performing their regular motions.

Q. What is the reason that at the sight of some eatas bles, a thin water or (pittle arises in the mouth ?

A. It is caus'd from the communion of the nerves of the eyes and palate, which arise and run along together in one common trunk, till they are diftributed to their respective parts, amongst which there is a certain sympathy or consent of action,

Q. Gentlemen, I have long passionately lov'da Lady, who for her excellent perfections rather merits ado, ration : I have pafi'd through all the probationary in, junttions requir’d of a lover, given my self violent airs, then figh’d, whin'd, pip'd under her window, look'd like an ass, went Novenly, forgot to blow my nose and made verses ; nay, I had certainly attempted to kill my self, but that I feared her consent to it. Now pray resolve me if this divine creature, this illuftrious Goddess, in regard is all I have suffer'd for her fake, is not obliged in gratitude to return love for love ?

A. Certainly no. It argues worse than pagan Atupidity, to expect the object of our worship Should make reciprocal returns, it is sufficient; if the accepts your offerings, but presumption to expect fo much as familiar conference with a superiour power : were she convinc'd that you was such another divine creature, (of which, your going Novenly and looking like an ass, gives us little hopes ) she might possibly admit of parley ; but even then would not be under the least obligation of making mutual returns, for. that wou'd cncroach on the freedom of her choice, В 2

and

[ocr errors]

,

and reduce her to a more servile condition than your

Therefore if your Goddess be inexorable, the best advice we can give, is, to comfort your self with Epicurus's maxim, that your fufferings cannot be great and long : perbaps she may honour your afhes with so much compunction, as to figh, and say, 'tis Pity and so call for the cards,

The Tenth MUSE, Sc.
LL pleasing Ovid in a strain divine,
Sings the dear Cyprian Queen, 4 Goddess bright,
Charming to fenfe, and ravishing to light.
With wounding pasion he describes her court,
Here smiling graces play, there Cupids sport.
In numbers like their own, he sings the Nine,
And their own wit flows sweetly in each line.
These moving themes Ovid's bright genius fir'd,
Divine the poet, and the muse inspir'd.
I fing a Goddess equally divine,
Another muse, and a new grace is mine,

And bright' as those as Paphos do's the charmer shine.
In her they all unite, in her you see
An exquisitely charming Deity.
Wit dwells upon her tongue, and in her face,
A killing sweetness and majestick grace,
Successively maintain each other's place.

Tbus in Hortensia we may juftly own,
The Muses, Graces, Venus all in one.
The following Attack was made upon us the first

day our PROPOSALS came out ; since we have eng

ter'd the lifts, we must undertake all combatants. 0. Ar bold solutists, folve the doubt,

Or elfe expect r'll lay about :
Why each one sivers when he pisses,
For so it is with maids and misses,
Tis fo with boys and girls withal,
with high and low, with great and small,

}

[ocr errors]

Nor

.

Nor fate, nor sex, nor age is free,
Pray what shou'd then the reason be ?
But if you cannot solve this shaking,
I'll set your very hearts on aking,
And piss upon your undertaking ?

A. What daring squire is this, what mortal,
Who thus attacks us in the portal,
That does thus peevishly perfift,
As if he had bimself be-pift?
Such wit as yours, from us, we tell ye,
As easily breaks, as wind from belly,

The reason why you Thake in ftaling,
(Except you have some other ailing,
That weakens all your joynts ) is WIND,
Not having vent through port behind,
Which the excretion of the urine,
(Pray mind me for it is a true thing).
Protrudes through the intestine pores,
Cau), rim of belly, and its stores
Of muscles, membrane, then it

goes
Strait to the membrane adipose ;
And there it agitates the divers,
I've quite forgot their name Oh! fibres,
This makes you shake much like pick-pocket,
By beadle snapt, or like French prophet.
Your question, yet, is blind to reason,
(Except you mean to hit the season)
For very few have known this shaking,
Tho' you might be in such a taking,
As dreading what you might get by't ;
Thus cowards wink and shake and fight.

Now, Sir, altho you thought to pose,
In doggrel, not so smooth as prose,
You see how soon our answer Aies out,
And so you may go piss your eyes out.
To an Enrich'd Cobler, being an Imitation of Martial,

Lib. 9. Epig. 74.
Hou late profesor of the last and awl,
Thou modern farmer of a fordid fall,

Whole

[merged small][ocr errors]

T

B3

« PreviousContinue »