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Under the conduct of young Lancaster,
And Westmoreland: this is the news at full.
North. For this I shall have time enough to mourn. In poison there is physic; and these news, Having been well, that would have made me sick, Being sick, have in some measure made me well; And as the wretch, whose fever-weakened joints, Like strengthless hinges, buckle under life, Impatient of his fit, breaks like a fire
Out of his keeper's arms; even so my limbs,
A scaly gauntlet now, with joints of steel,
Tra. This strained passion doth you wrong, my lord.3
Bard. Sweet earl, divorce not wisdom from your honor.
Mor. The lives of all your loving complices
Lean on your health; the which, if you give o'er
1 Grief, in the latter part of this line, is used, in its present sense, for sorrow; in the former part for bodily pain.
2 Shakspeare, like his contemporaries, uses nice in the sense of effeminate, delicate, tender.
3 This line in the quarto, is, by mistake, given to Umfreville, who is spoken of in this very scene as absent. It is given to Travers at Steevens's suggestion.
To stormy passion, must perforce decay.
And summed the account of chance, before you said,-
Of wounds, and scars; and that his forward spirit
Bard. We all, that are engaged to this loss,
Mor. 'Tis more than time; and, my most noble lord, I hear for certain, and do speak the truth,
The gentle archbishop of York is up,2
1 The fourteen following lines, and a number of others in this play were not in the quarto edition.
2 This and the following twenty lines are not found in the quarto.
Supposed sincere and holy in his thoughts,
Of fair king Richard, scraped from Pomfret stones;
North. I knew of this before; but, to speak truth,
The aptest way for safety, and revenge.
Get posts, and letters, and make friends with speed; Never so few, and never yet more need.
SCENE II. London. A Street.
Enter SIR JOHN FALSTAFF, with his Page bearing his sword and buckler.
Fal. Sirrah, you giant, what says the doctor to my water? 2
Page. He said, sir, the water itself was a good, healthy water; but for the party that owed it, he might have more diseases than he knew for.
Fal. Men of all sorts take a pride to gird at me. The brain of this foolish-compounded clay, man, is not able to vent any thing that tends to laughter, more than I invent, or is invented on me. I am not only
1 i. e. great and small, all ranks.
2 This quackery was once so much in fashion that Linacre, the founder of the College of Physicians, formed a statute to restrain apothecaries from carrying the water of their patients to a doctor, and afterwards giving medicines in consequence of the opinions pronounced concerning it. This statute was followed by another, which forbade the doctors themselves to pronounce on any disorder from such an uncertain diagnostic. But this did not extinguish the practice.
4" Gird (Mr. Gifford says) is a mere metathesis of gride, and means a thrust, a blow: the metaphorical use of the word for a smart stroke of wit, taunt, reproachful retort, &c., is justified by a similar application of kindred terms in all languages.
witty in myself, but the cause that wit is in other men. I do here walk before thee, like a sow, that hath overwhelmed all her litter but one. If the prince put thee into my service for any other reason than to set me off, why then I have no judgment. Thou whoreson mandrake,' thou art fitter to be worn in my cap, than to wait at my heels. I was never manned with an agate till now: but I will set you neither in gold nor silver, but in vile apparel, and send you back again to your master, for a jewel; the juvenal,3 the prince your master, whose chin is not yet fledged. I will sooner have a beard grow in the palm of my hand, than he shall get one on his cheek; and yet he will not stick to say, his face is a face-royal. God may finish it when he will, it is not a hair amiss yet he may keep it still as a face-royal, for a barber shall never earn sixpence out of it; and yet he will be crowing, as if he had writ man ever since his father was a bachelor. He may keep his own grace, but he is almost out of mine, I can assure him.- -What said master Dumbleton about the satin for my short cloak, and slops?
Page. He said, sir, you should procure him better assurance than Bardolph; he would not take his bond and yours; he liked not the security.
Fal. Let him be damned like the glutton! may his tongue be hotter! 5-A whoreson Achitophel! a rascally
1 A root supposed to have the shape of a man. Quacks and impostors counterfeited, with the root briony, figures resembling parts of the human body, which were sold to the credulous as endued with specific virtues. See sir Thomas Brown's Vulgar Errors, p. 72, edit. 1686.
2 An agate is used metaphorically for a very diminutive person, in allusion to the small figures cut in agate for rings and broaches.
3 Juvenal occurs in A Midsummer Night's Dream, and in Love's Labor's Lost. It is also used in many places by Chaucer for a young
4 Johnson says that, by a face-royal, Falstaff means a face exempt from the touch of vulgar hands. Steevens imagines that there may be a quibble intended on the coin called a real, or royal; that a barber can no more earn sixpence by his face, than by the face stamped on the coin, the one requiring as little shaving as the other. Mason thinks that Falstaff's conceit is, "If nothing be taken out of a royal, it will remain a royal still, as it was." The reader will decide for himself.
5 An allusion to the fate of the rich man, who had fared sumptuously every day, when he requested a drop of water to cool his tongue.
yea-forsooth knave! to bear a gentleman in hand,' and then stand upon security!-The whoreson smoothpates do now wear nothing but high shoes, and bunches of keys at their girdles; and if a man is thorough 2 with them in honest taking up, then they must stand upon-security. I had as lief they would put ratsbane in my mouth, as offer to stop it with security. I looked he should have sent me two-and-twenty yards of satin, as I am a true knight, and he sends me security. Well, he may sleep in security; for he hath the horn of abundance, and the lightness of his wife shines through it; and yet cannot he see, though he have his own lantern to light him.- -Where's Bardolph ?
Page. He's gone into Smithfield, to buy your worship a horse.
Fal. I bought him in Paul's, and he'll buy me a horse in Smithfield; an I could get me but a wife in the stews, I were manned, horsed, and wived.
Enter the Lord Chief Justice,3 and an Attendant.
Page. Sir, here comes the nobleman that committed the prince for striking him about Bardolph. Fal. Wait close, I will not see him.
Ch. Just. What's he that goes there?
Ch. Just. He that was in question for the robbery? Atten. He, my lord; but he hath since done good service at Shrewsbury; and, as I hear, is now going with some charge to the lord John of Lancaster.
Ch. Just. What, to York? Call him back again.
Fal. Boy, tell him I am deaf.
Page. You must speak louder; my master is deaf. Ch. Just. I am sure he is, to the hearing of any
1 To bear in hand is to keep in expectation by false promises.
2 i. e. in their debt, by taking up goods on credit.
3 This judge was sir Wm. Gascoigne, chief justice of the King's Bench. He died Dec. 17, 1413.